Dating advice needed!!

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2

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  • ican♥and♥iwill
    ican♥and♥iwill Posts: 176 Member
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    Thanks everyone for the advice!! Can I just say that I HATE dating?! And men think women are complicated?! Holy crap! I really appreciate your thoughts and opinions!


    ETA: I really really LOVE the man perspective!! He's 27, btw.
  • tissyazd
    tissyazd Posts: 221 Member
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    Firstly in my humble opinion men and women think differently and even if they try to take on the others point of view it's not the same. So I'd listen to the male advice in this thread. I am not saying ignore the female advice by the way.. Any idea of the age? To me (being a man, now aged 38 and having had and lost a few girlfriends I bet he's early 20's) it seems like he's working through trust issues. Don't chase, don't call him immature, don't blame him, don't say he has trust issues. Just drop it. He'll contact you and when he does just state the facts. You weren't available, I didn't want to stay in by myself so I planned to hook up with friend and his boyfriend as they're good friends. We like facts. We don't like being told we're wrong. You know you're right, he know's you're right and he'll sulk if you tell him.

    Up to you if you think he's worth helping him work through it.

    OOH yea, listen to him! Then. if he is still being shady, let him go! Good advice! Do you mind consulting with a few of my friends ;)
  • chelekaz
    chelekaz Posts: 871 Member
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    My first instinct is to say say to hell with him. But, if he is someone that is special and you feel that there is a strong connection then I would talk to him and explain. I would not just show up at his house though. Call and leave a voicemail if he will not answer. And I would say I saw your post and I wanted you to know that my friend is engaged to another man and that we are friends. You didn't let me know if you wanted to do something and I didn't feel like sitting home. If you want to call me and talk about it then my phone is open.

    Don't beg for his understanding, do not apologize for anything.
  • binary_jester
    binary_jester Posts: 3,311 Member
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    My first thought was...what a girl. Second thought was...gosh he gives up easily. To me, a month in should allow someone the chance to explain themselves before flying off the handle. It is easy for me to pass judgment though. Maturity was not a strong point at that age.
  • Dreamerlove
    Dreamerlove Posts: 441 Member
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    Girl--if he is already acting like that, and being immature by not communicating, I would just let him go on by. Men don't change unless God intervenes. If you like him because he showed interest in you, let me tell you, you are beautiful and tons of guys are going to like you. Just don't worry about i. Show the power you don't need him and let him crawl to you, saying he is sorry for putting it in FB. I am happily married for 2 yrs now, and let me tell you--his actions now will be the same always.
  • daniface
    daniface Posts: 338 Member
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    I would ignore him until he contacts you again, seems like he's really imature and seeking attention. dont feed the monster. Go out and have fun with your gay friend tonight, they're more fun anyway.

    C will be calling you in a couple days, if not tonight. once he contacts you, you can explain yourself or really you should be letting him expalin himself- think of it as laying some good groundwork for the future, that is if you'd like to continue things with C, it's important to let him know you won't put up with that kind of needy bull****.
  • lilRicki
    lilRicki Posts: 4,555 Member
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    My first thought was...what a girl. Second thought was...gosh he gives up easily. To me, a month in should allow someone the chance to explain themselves before flying off the handle. It is easy for me to pass judgment though. Maturity was not a strong point at that age.



    so when does maturity occur in men? because my man is 32...and he gets his feelers hurt VERY easily:ohwell:
  • ME02134
    ME02134 Posts: 26
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    The fact that he decided to update his status about "it being over" is ridiculous especially if it's only a month in. I think that's just screaming he wants attention because he knows you're giong to see that. I wouldnt contact him at all. If he calls you, you can explain yourself and take it from there but if not he doesnt seem worth it in my opinion! Go out and have a good time with your friends-- good luck!
  • sillygoose1977
    sillygoose1977 Posts: 2,151 Member
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    My first thought was...what a girl. Second thought was...gosh he gives up easily. To me, a month in should allow someone the chance to explain themselves before flying off the handle. It is easy for me to pass judgment though. Maturity was not a strong point at that age.



    so when does maturity occur in men? because my man is 32...and he gets his feelers hurt VERY easily:ohwell:

    My boyfriend uses the word feelers too.

    Maturity in men occurs in their 70's about 5 minutes before they start regressing back towards childhood. :wink:
  • brittlynne3579
    brittlynne3579 Posts: 217 Member
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    Ugh, I don't like that at all. I would let it go!

    If you really feel like this guy is worth it, I would send a brief email or text (since he's too douchey to take your calls) explaining the situation. That would be THE ONLY effort I would make at this point.

    Don't make someone a priority in your life if they won't make you one in theirs!
  • binary_jester
    binary_jester Posts: 3,311 Member
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    My first thought was...what a girl. Second thought was...gosh he gives up easily. To me, a month in should allow someone the chance to explain themselves before flying off the handle. It is easy for me to pass judgment though. Maturity was not a strong point at that age.



    so when does maturity occur in men? because my man is 32...and he gets his feelers hurt VERY easily:ohwell:

    My boyfriend uses the word feelers too.

    Maturity in men occurs in their 70's about 5 minutes before they start regressing back towards childhood. :wink:
    Then we die. goodnight.gif
  • JoyousRen
    JoyousRen Posts: 3,823 Member
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    My first thought was...what a girl. Second thought was...gosh he gives up easily. To me, a month in should allow someone the chance to explain themselves before flying off the handle. It is easy for me to pass judgment though. Maturity was not a strong point at that age.

    So when does maturity occur in men? because my man is 32...and he gets his feelers hurt VERY easily:ohwell:

    My boyfriend uses the word feelers too.

    Maturity in men occurs in their 70's about 5 minutes before they start regressing back towards childhood. :wink:
    Then we die. goodnight.gif
    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • RoadDog
    RoadDog Posts: 2,946 Member
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    Don't set a precedent. He's not asking you to make the rules; you only choice is to play the game or not play the game.

    I'm showing my age, but FB, texting, tweeting, twittering, whatever is no real means of communication. How about sharing real feelings during a real conversation?

    If you live your life doing the things you enjoy, you will meet persons with the same interests.
  • sillygoose1977
    sillygoose1977 Posts: 2,151 Member
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    My first thought was...what a girl. Second thought was...gosh he gives up easily. To me, a month in should allow someone the chance to explain themselves before flying off the handle. It is easy for me to pass judgment though. Maturity was not a strong point at that age.

    So when does maturity occur in men? because my man is 32...and he gets his feelers hurt VERY easily:ohwell:

    My boyfriend uses the word feelers too.

    Maturity in men occurs in their 70's about 5 minutes before they start regressing back towards childhood. :wink:
    Then we die. goodnight.gif
    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

    Yep. It is the truth. Luckily I find the child-like qualities in men endearing...to a certain extent.
  • azalea30
    azalea30 Posts: 19
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    dating sucks i have given up if its meant to be then it will come along just wonder when this will happen ? lol
  • binary_jester
    binary_jester Posts: 3,311 Member
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    My first thought was...what a girl. Second thought was...gosh he gives up easily. To me, a month in should allow someone the chance to explain themselves before flying off the handle. It is easy for me to pass judgment though. Maturity was not a strong point at that age.

    So when does maturity occur in men? because my man is 32...and he gets his feelers hurt VERY easily:ohwell:

    My boyfriend uses the word feelers too.

    Maturity in men occurs in their 70's about 5 minutes before they start regressing back towards childhood. :wink:
    Then we die. goodnight.gif
    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

    Yep. It is the truth. Luckily I find the child-like qualities in men endearing...to a certain extent.
    And it is an awesome attitude like that...that keeps the human race alive.
  • JoyousRen
    JoyousRen Posts: 3,823 Member
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    Yep. It is the truth. Luckily I find the child-like qualities in men endearing...to a certain extent.
    And it is an awesome attitude like that...that keeps the human race alive.
    Not all men can be as awesome as you. :tongue:
  • binary_jester
    binary_jester Posts: 3,311 Member
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    Yep. It is the truth. Luckily I find the child-like qualities in men endearing...to a certain extent.
    And it is an awesome attitude like that...that keeps the human race alive.
    Not all men can be as awesome as you. :tongue:
    My sole purpose in life is to make other guys look better.
  • JoyousRen
    JoyousRen Posts: 3,823 Member
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    Not all men can be as awesome as you. :tongue:
    My sole purpose in life is to make other guys look better.
    That should be C's purpose in life. He is doing a better job than you.
  • binary_jester
    binary_jester Posts: 3,311 Member
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    Not all men can be as awesome as you. :tongue:
    My sole purpose in life is to make other guys look better.
    That should be C's purpose in life. He is doing a better job than you.
    So to clarify...I am doing a crappy job...at doing a crappy job. doh.gif

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