I want a life!!! Please support

Whos_Rose

Hey all,
So I'm 19 a female and 5'7 ish. When I started this weight lose journey on about June 30th I was weighing in at 350 pounds. I was so embarrassed. That wasn't even my heaviest but I avoided scales like they were the plague. I felt like I missed out on my entire freshman year of college. I didn't join teams, avoided many social interactions, didn't rush a sorority like I wanted, didn't go on spring break or summer trips I sidelined myself for an entire year! Back home I was already used to being the big girl, but at a whole new university I felt like a walking joke! There was a fitness center on campus that I tried exercising at but was so embarrassed by the states and jokes made at my expense that I completely gave up. Ultimately I transferred from that college, not just because of that but because I didn't fit in at all. But I'm afraid I'll never fit in because I don't know who I truly am. I'm almost a month into this journey and weigh exactly 320 pounds today. I've gone from eating over 3200 calories a day (sometimes way more than that) to between 1200 and 1500 a day and try to burn between 800 and 1000 calories a day. The biggest problem for me is I don't know what I'm doing, most of my workouts are walking and things I see on Instagram and as far as eating I'm nearly clueless. I've had nothing but eggs chicken and veggies for a month. Also I have no support system. The closest thing I had to a support system was an emotionally abusive ex and my mom who is an extreme bully about my weight. She's 5'4 295 pounds and is getting gastric bypass in a few months. It's hard because she likes to joke how I'll be the only fat one in the house after her surgery. Long story short I just want a chance to be a teen, I want to feel healthy and strong. I don't want to worry if I'll fit or if I'm too heavy for a chair. I don't want to tuck my stomach into my jeans or be embarrassed in fitting rooms. But as hard as I try I can't do this alone. If you guys could friend me and encourage me and just give me some advice. I know I can do this with a good support system.

Whos_Rose

Any advice or even just a follow would help

sandymayhew2014

Rose
I so know what you are going through especially about the lack of support from people. Though I am older, 58, my mom was my worst enemy for me. It seems she was never satisfied on how much I weighed. I was never as good as she was. The rest of my family has never had a weight problem but I do. Right before she passed away I had lost down to a size 8-10 and kept it off for a while but then my husband became an enemy as well. He loves to eat and eat sweets and at times would get upset if he wanted an ice cream cone or a snack and I didn't so to save the sake of arguments I would eat. I was a smoker as well and that was part of my comfort. Years ago I gave it up and the weight came on very quickly and I ballooned to a size 22W and heading to the next size. I too can no longer enjoy the simplest of things such as riding rides with my grandchildren for fear of not fitting in a seat. I wake up each day with aches and pains in my joints. I no longer have any cartilage in my right knee so I am in constant pain. My back at times feels like it wants to break in two. I am a teacher and a coach of sports at a high school and by the end of each day I am exhausted and ache. I can not show my teams what exactly to do for fear of embarrassment. I went to the doctor back in mid July and when I saw it in writing "morbid obese" and she talked about weight loss surgery I decided it was time to do something. That day I weighed in a 243, the heaviest of my life and I am only 5'1". I battle each day with my weight. I battle with fitting in each day. A social person I am not especially in the summer time and wearing shorts. We go to Aruba once a year and I feel okay there since no one knows me there but I still am self conscious that people are staring at me at all times. I am a health teacher and a gym teacher so I know what is good and bad decisions on nutrition and exercises and I teach that to the kids but I myself am a mess. The day I came home from the doctor I found this app on my phone and have begum using it. The doctor asked me 'who was I accountable to for my weight" and I had no one who really cared. So she wanted me to call in at the beginning of each month my weight. I have still be unable to do that since I live in fear of gaining it back and then some more as the past has indicated. But with this program I have lost 14 pounds since mid July and I am proud of that but I struggle each day.
I know you can do it just like I am trying to do it.
We both just need to take one day at a time and I actually take one meal at a time.
I have tried to get my husband on board since he himself has health issues but he is reluctant to change his ways and he still tries to say it's okay if you have this or have that. NO it is not I say!
Yesterday we went out to celebrate our 37 year anniversary to a nice steak house. I went way over on calories and feel so guilty but today I am trying hard to compensate for it and no I should of made a better choice on my meal. So too have a long ways to go. I do not want surgery by any means.
Lets work this together and reach our goals - one step, one meal, and one day at a time.!!!!

Alex

Welcome to MyFitnessPal! Thank you for sharing a bit of your story with us. Your freshman year in college sounds awful and yet I am impressed with you that rather than use it as a reason to give up, you are using it as motivation for change.

There are lots of wonderful, supportive people in our community. Make friends. Don't give up. Don't stop logging. Failure isn't falling down, its not getting back up the next day.

As for specific advice, I will leave that to our members... although it does sound like you aren't eating your exercise calories back which is what we recommend. I imagine people will have lots of guidance for you, but here is one of our more popular getting started links: http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1080242-a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants

Best of luck to you on your path.

crpeterson84

Hey!
Today is the first day that I am REALLY starting this weight loss journey. Holding myself accountable and all of that.

Pinterest of all things is such an amazing resource. You can search for low carb or Paleo recipes and end up getting meals with TONS OF flavor. This morning I sat down and made a menu for a week. My husband is at the grocery store now shopping. You can also get a lot of low cost food by shopping at local Farmers Markets and stuff. You get a low price and quality ingredients!

As far as exercise- you are ahead of me on that one. I was in an accident a few weeks ago and am stuck on crutches for a couple of more weeks. So my exercise is limited. Even before I suffered with my weight I wasn't someone who enjoyed the gym. I do love hiking, golfing and just being outside. So that is my plan. Walk to different parks- find rose gardens to walk through, drive to a park and hike. I have always found that if I'm being active and enjoying it- I'll stick with it way more then being active out of obligation. Hopefully you find some form of activity that you enjoy.

Your story was important, it is nice to see that other people share similar struggles. It will inspire us all on our weight loss journey. I can't wait to hear about your success though!

Whos_Rose

Thank you so much! I've started and stopped so many times that I know this is it! I'm proud of you and your decision to start on this journey and I feel together we can encourage one another to get to where we need to be. So far mfp has been the big difference for me because it helps with my being accountable and having a support system.

angela233Z

Rose - congratulations on getting started. I wish you lots of luck.

Angela

MarcieColley

Welcome and congratulations on taking that step to better yourself. You have to do it for you. I have struggled with weight loss my entire life (since elementary school) so I know what you are going through. I am 39 years old with three kids and within the last year of feeling like I didn't even know who I was anymore I made the decision to make a change in my life and losing weight was a priority. I haven't had a great weight loss since starting MVP 95 days ago but I am feeling better about myself. I just made my meal portions smaller and I try to walk 1 or more miles a day. I don't weigh myself often because the scale is my enemy but I know that there has been changes in my body because I feel it. All I can say is just take it one day at a time and just love yourself. This site has been wonderful. I have a lot a family support but sometimes I just need someone else to talk to who feels the same way or is going through a similar situation and this site has been a great support for me. So keep it up and know that you can talk to any of us without any type of judgment. Good luck on your journey.

Cindy632014

Rose,

You have taken your first big step with MFP, asking for support.

This is my first also... first time making a post ( sorry, just read, my second post,old brain,lol). This 63 year old is not very computer smart. I started my journey with MFP June 5th and am down 11 lbs. I find it hard, boring, work but if I can get my Diabetic A1C down , it will be well worth it.
Keep at it, you can do this..... it is your life alone and your responsibility .....claim it!

ghosthackexe

WELCOME TO THE CLUB!

nwright77

Hi there,

I just read your profile. I am the only one in my family who has truly had problems with their weight. While I was growing up, my mum's siblings would have a go at her because of my weight. At the start of this year I finally decided to do something about my weight as I had reached over 230 lb. I am following a program called The Dissident Diet. It is more a lifestyle change than a diet, if you treat it as a diet then you are more likely to fail. I can't praise Dawn Waldron enough for her advice.

Before I started on my new eating plan I was hardly eating anything during the day (mostly I sit on my butt at a computer!) and the only exercise I was doing was walking the 30 minutes to work and back. My weight has slowly been creeping up on me since 2005 so a couple of years back I decided to go to the gym, unfortunately I was still not shifting the weight. So far, since January this year, I have lost almost 40 lb which is a huge step in where I want to be with regards to my weight.

It would be interesting to see what you eat on a day to day basis. I know you mention that you eat proteins and veggies, but it may be the type of veggies you eat. The reason I ask is you may be carb sensitive like I am. Any carb-rich foods such as potatoes, rice, bread make me gain weight like nobodies business. The Dissident Diet follows a High fat, moderate protein, low carb regime. There are more vegetables listed as zero carb (of which you can eat unlimited amounts of) in The Dissident Diet than the Atkins diet. I have tried Atkins myself and failed after only a week as it left me very lethargic. Since being on The Dissident Diet I have loads more energy yet I'm still only getting my exercise from walking to and from work!

I have listed below items considered zero carb on The Dissident Diet:

asparagus - aubergine - avocado - bamboo shoots -broccoli - cabbage - cauliflower - celery
- chicory - courgette - cucumber - endive - fennel - garlic - herbs - kale - leeks - lettuce - mange tout -
marrow - okra - pak choi - parsley - peppers - radicchio - radish - rocket - spinach - spring greens -
sugar snap peas - Swiss chard - tomatoes - watercress.

Low carb vegetables (limit of 150g a day)

artichoke - bean sprouts - beetroot - broad beans - Brussels sprouts - carrots - celeriac - edamame
beans - green beans - Jerusalem artichoke - mushrooms - olives - onions - pumpkin - peas - rhubarb -
swede - squash - turnips - water chestnuts - you can even include sweet potato due to some of the sugars being indigestible


I hope this helps and good luck

Natalie

crpeterson84

Thanks Rose, I am really glad I joined. It really does seem like a great resource!

LivyMarie93

Rose, (beautiful name btw), I don't have much support either, but I know if I can just stick to it everything will pay off later. We're all in this together and I would love to join you in your journey. I can feel where you're coming from as far as the fitting room drama. I'm sick of it. When I start my journey tomorrow all I will think about to keep me going is "I will get back into those cute ripped skinny jeans I bought 2 years ago" lol. I'm taking baby steps. I have 4 weight loss goals. Like between August and October I want to lose about 10 pounds or more, then I go on from there. That has always helped me but I usually end up losing motivation to keep going once I accomplish the 1st goal. But I'm tired of keep restarting and feeling like crap because of it. Now I'm ready to really lose weight because the family and I are going to Jamaica next year and I really want to be able to feel amazing when that day comes. You have my support. It's always nice to have motivational people behind you .