Quick questions for the ladies. Please help

StrawberryJam40

My solution appears to be not hanging around such awful people. Seriously. Where are you finding these people?

Agree.

AllOutof_Bubblegum

My solution appears to be not hanging around such awful people. Seriously. Where are you finding these people?

This. There's only one person in my world that would ever dare speak to me in such a fashion, and guess what? I cut him out of my life. People will only give you as much guff as you allow them to. Demand more respect for yourself and you'll see a sharp decline in people who show disrespect.

rachelrb85

1. Smile and nod
2. Make sure you have the right size bra, try doubling up if you have to. Either two sports bras, or one normal bra under a sports bra.
3. Tell them your body will unfortunately lose weight where it wants to and you have no control over that
4. Yes. One time I was out on a run and had to poop so bad I stopped inside a Burger King. *kitten* happens.
5. Pop a Midol, double up if you have to (tampon and panty liner) and suck it up. No different than any other time of the month for me.

Jerseygrrl

1. How do you handle back handed compliments? Do your best to let them roll off. Either they genuinely mean well, and they deserve a break for trying to be kind, or they are being passive aggressive, and they don't deserve your time.

2. For the bustier women do you feel like regardless of what work out you're doing your back and shoulders just aren't getting enough support? I've tried MANY bras. I have simply ended up wearing two. It's odd, at first, but I really don't notice it anymore.

3. How do you handle people who tell you not to lose your breasts or butt? Haven't had this experience.

4. During workouts do you ever get an overwhelming feeling of needing to poop? Yes. I try to "stay on schedule" with all of that by eating regularly, but, sometimes, it happens.

5. Any advice for the time of the month? If you feel good enough to work out, by all means, work out. If you feel miserable, don't punish yourself. A day or two isn't going to make that much difference in the long run. Drink lots of water and up your fiber.

marissanik

1. Don't take them to heart. People don't realize what they're saying half the time and how it may impact you.

2. Never have I ever found a good sports bra. Wearing two bras has been the best solution for me.

3. Lots of people have said "wow you've lost your boobs eh". Not true. I am the exact same cup size. My rib cage got smaller, and so it makes them appear smaller but the cup like I said hasn't changed. Still a D, and actually the girl said I could wear a DD in the less fuller cups. Again. Don't let it bother you. You're not any less of a woman because you lose some curves.

4. Have not experienced this one. When I have Quest bars that are extremely high in fibre before my workout... then yes.

5. Continue with the regular exercise and food routine. I never let it get in my way. Suck it up buttercup!

Allterrain_Lady

1. I take those for what they are. A compliment, somehow. Try to not read to much into it. Most of the people are actually trying to be nice whilst honest. Take the good part and leave the rest. For example "You have a pretty face" means they actually think you have a pretty face. If someone were to compliment your legs would you think "what about my face"?

2.Can't answer that. I'm considered somewhat busty but never had trouble carrying it. Wish they were bigger actually.

3. Depends on the person. To someone who's trying to be considerate for what they consider my assets, I'd try to educate them about weight loss (no spot reduction, overall bodyfat %,...)
I happened to have this conversation with someone who was only trying to make me feel worried about the ultimate results (because of their own insecurities most of the time) I said "I'm doing the best thing for myself in the long run. Health and fitness and weight loss are adding quality to my days and most likely days to my life. I can buy boobs back if I miss them and create a booty that you would dream of with the proper exercise regimen. There is no issue here to be discussed"

4. Never. You can probably do something about this by twisting your diet. Maybe not to much fiber before cardio?

5. TMI messes with everything. My mood, my energy, my cravings. But I'm also ok having it. That's part of what my body is supposed to experience. I'll probably miss it when menopause kick in.
That said, try to recognize what works for you. I'm pretty sure it's a case of 'to each girl her own medicine'. Mine is: cutting salt completely for two days, indulging a bit more with pleasure calories (normal time 80% healthy / 20% treats each day) and quit cardio for the time.

Hope that helps!

Psychgrrl

1. "You look pretty good for your age." UGH! At what age do we start "adjusting" for beauty? That's also a GREAT song by folk singer Christine Lavin. She's freakin' hilarious. Whether or not I say something depends on my relationship and how bad the "compliment" is. A lot of times I'll ask--"what did you mean by that?" or "was that intended as a compliment? because it didn't sound that way."

2. I wear two for my high-impact cardio.

3. If it's a guy, ask him about taking Viagra or getting a penis ring. It's the same thing as asking a women to "keep" her butt and breasts when she's losing weight. It's dehumanizing and reduces you to just a sexual object. I'm also the person that when a guy mentions "chick flicks," I say "oh, as opposed to a '**** flick?'" When they say they want to go to Hooters "for the atmosphere and the food" I say, OK, then let's go to this great sports bar with terrific wings I know of where all the waiters are hot guys dressed in tight white pants with bulls-eyes painted on their crotches called "****'s." If you're in it for the atmosphere, then the wait staff shouldn't matter, should it? If you want to look at boobies, just admit it. Don't say you're reading Playboy for the articles, no one believes you. Just like no one believes supermodels when they say they were ugly in high school. But I digress .....

4. Squats can do that to people, I've seen. Might depend on what you eat and where you are in your digestive cycle when you workout. Maybe take a look at your log and what exercise and what urges you're having and try tweaking a little.

5. Sorry--I'm one of those girls everyone hates.No problems there. Don't notice a change. Again, sorry. (Though there's been some interesting research on the impact of a woman's hormones on hydration during exercise recently.) Using interesting piece of info to try and make up for my lack of suffering.

seltzermint555

1. How do you handle back handed compliments?

<> I generally say "thank you" to acknowledge the nice part about it...and then laugh/smirk privately at that person for their rudeness or lack of tact. If someone says something I really don't like, such as "I bet you feel SO MUCH BETTER now that you lost all that weight!!!!" I will politely but bluntly set them straight in a hurry by saying something like, "Actually I don't. I felt really good before honestly! But my health risks are much lower now, so I'm pretty happy about that."

2. For the bustier women do you feel like regardless of what work out you're doing your back and shoulders just aren't getting enough support? (I've invested in some really awesome sports bras that keep the girls in place during the workout but still can't escape achy back and shoulders)

<> I am pretty busty - 36DD at 5'8" 173 -- but honestly I have never had an issue with pain or lack of support etc. I just wear underwire 24/7 though including during exercise. Have yet to find a sports bra that was right for me but still on the lookout! They are always so tight they hurt, or too loose to provde ANY support.

3. How do you handle people who tell you not to lose your breasts or butt?

<> I have never had anyone tell me this. When I first started losing weight my husband joked a lot about not losing my butt because he is a hips-and-bum fan and mine are large. But now he just comments that I've kept my shape and he's really happy. I know that he was mostly joking though in the past. Honestly I am such a modest & nerdy type of lady that I can't even begin to imagine anyone in my life (besides my husband) commenting on something like that to me ;-)

4. During workouts do you ever get an overwhelming feeling of needing to poop? (So TMI SORRY)

<> actually no...perhaps I am not working out hard enough LOL

5. Any advice for the time of the month?

<> I am fond of generic Midol and plenty of sexytime to ease the troubles. I don't exercise on my heaviest crampy day but the rest of the time I'm good.

Ainevethe

I mostly silently seethe and wish I could handle them internally with as much grace as I somehow manage externally. It's tough some days. And I have heard that before ("you would be so pretty if you were thin!)". Remarkably, I lost a ton of weight for a while after my son was born and you know what I heard? Not that I was suddenly pretty, oh no. Instead I got : "Wow, you got so thin! Are you sick? You looked healthier before!! " Despite walking 2+ hours a day (son had horrific colic and walking was the only way to help the constant crying <from both of us some days lol>) and the healthy diet I was on....people didn't credit it as the hard WORK that it was. I earned that! And yet....

Moral of the story? There may potentially *always* be someone like that in our worlds. You know that saying "Other people's opinion of me is none of my business" ? I try to remember that. It isn't always easy though.

That time of the month: more flow-based (oh what a bad coincidence THAT is) based activities instead of jumping based stuff. And advil when I need it. Yes to the boob issues too. I can only say when I lost the weight I had less pain. I had less breasts though of course.. I tried to embrace the ballet dancer look with my tragic barely- B's at the time but I missed them. Of course, they are big again and my neck/back/shoulders hurt too. This time, I will embrace change. Besides, if I miss them THAT badly (doubtful), I can buy them back. =D

VeggieKidMandy

I tell people to mind their own damn business, but usually what helps with that is not telling my business. I found out a long time ago, to avoid negative comments ( at least a majority of them ) was to not to clue people in about what I am doing. That way people cant really have a comment about my weight loss or an opinion about my health. Once you give people the opportunity to have an opinion about YOUR health and YOUR weight its an open door for a lot of unneeded comments. While some of them may be helpful , most you either just need to take with a grain of salt. Since it seems like these comments are upsetting you, I would make it a point NOT to discuss your weight loss or health with others. Some people just dont know what to say to people when they are confronted with someone heavier than them, or someone who has never had a weight issue themselves. ITs hard for them to be in your shoes. Keep your head up, your doing a great job.