Too Many Comments @ my weight loss

Wookinpanub

So it took like forever to get any comments and but the last 2 weeks they are almost constant. I probably get 2-4 a day depending on work, family or social interaction. I am a private person and was always really embarrassed about my weight. I never liked attention either. I know everyone means well but it can be too much for me. It just validates how much of a fat body I was and how people saw me. I guess weight plays that much havoc with your brain.

invisiblelo

Totally been here. I don't like people noticing. It makes me feel really paranoid and I don't know what to say back especially when it is my family. I know they mean well but I am so embarrassed by how fat I had got it brings it all back with every compliment.

Wookinpanub

Thanks invisiblelo - I went to the dentist last week and the hygienist who hadn't seen me for 6 months or so which is when I was at my heaviest said "it looks like you left the other half you at home" Not sure that is a compliment or a rude statement.

WolverhamptonFitness

When it happens it happens... people dont notice 1-3 pounds, but 5-6-7-8-9 people get it!

NewLIFEstyle4ME

So it took like forever to get any comments and but the last 2 weeks they are almost constant. I probably get 2-4 a day depending on work, family or social interaction. I am a private person and was always really embarrassed about my weight. I never liked attention either. I know everyone means well but it can be too much for me. It just validates how much of a fat body I was and how people saw me. I guess weight plays that much havoc with your brain.

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{ Hugs }}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} I hear the pain and annoyance/embarrassment in your post and I'm so sorry:flowerforyou: What you have accomplished (looking at your number line is absolutely tremendous and kudos to/for you--especially since this progress and goal accomplishment was a long time coming). Here's some things to consider/meditate on, that I hope will help you endure this, even though people mean well, is stressful to/for you--I am sure you are so grateful for the super hard work you've accomplished, but these quotes, may help cement that gratitude and/or help you see people's unwanted attention in a different perspective :

"Develop an attitude of gratitude, and give thanks for everything that happens to you, knowing that every step forward is a step toward achieving something bigger and better than your current situation." Brian Tracy

" Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend." Melody Beattie

" 'Thank you' is the best prayer that anyone could say. I say that one a lot. Thank you expresses extreme gratitude, humility, understanding." Alice Walker

" Gratitude is when memory is stored in the heart and not in the mind. " Lionel Hampton

" Joy is the simplest form of gratitude." Karl Barth

seltzermint555

Thanks invisiblelo - I went to the dentist last week and the hygienist who hadn't seen me for 6 months or so which is when I was at my heaviest said "it looks like you left the other half you at home" Not sure that is a compliment or a rude statement.

I think its maybe not "rude" but definitely tacky and crass.

Sorry you are dealing with this. I know how it feels, but I have found that it comes in waves. You will get this a lot for a few weeks or months and then silence when people start getting used to the slimmer you.

Wookinpanub

Thanks y'all ^^^^. I will tell you being self conscious about being over weight is worse then being self conscious about potential comments about my new appearance. I can deal with the positive comments.

BEVERLYSTEEN

I can only hope the person that made that comment about 'the other half' didn't realize how hurtful those words were and if you would have had the nerve to state your feelings an apology would have been given. That being said most people are only trying to encourage you to keep going on your success because they themselves cannot get on track.

Good Luck and just accept it or it will drive your crazy.

1HappyRedhead

So it took like forever to get any comments and but the last 2 weeks they are almost constant. I probably get 2-4 a day depending on work, family or social interaction. I am a private person and was always really embarrassed about my weight. I never liked attention either. I know everyone means well but it can be too much for me. It just validates how much of a fat body I was and how people saw me. I guess weight plays that much havoc with your brain.

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{ Hugs }}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} I hear the pain and annoyance/embarrassment in your post and I'm so sorry:flowerforyou: What you have accomplished (looking at your number line is absolutely tremendous and kudos to/for you--especially since this progress and goal accomplishment was a long time coming). Here's some things to consider/meditate on, that I hope will help you endure this, even though people mean well, is stressful to/for you--I am sure you are so grateful for the super hard work you've accomplished, but these quotes, may help cement that gratitude and/or help you see people's unwanted attention in a different perspective :

"Develop an attitude of gratitude, and give thanks for everything that happens to you, knowing that every step forward is a step toward achieving something bigger and better than your current situation." Brian Tracy

" Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend." Melody Beattie

" 'Thank you' is the best prayer that anyone could say. I say that one a lot. Thank you expresses extreme gratitude, humility, understanding." Alice Walker

" Gratitude is when memory is stored in the heart and not in the mind. " Lionel Hampton

" Joy is the simplest form of gratitude." Karl Barth

^You.... I like you.... :flowerforyou:

Wookinpanub

When it happens it happens... people dont notice 1-3 pounds, but 5-6-7-8-9 people get it!

After about 25 lbs a couple close friends mentioned something. About 45 lbs is when the comments became almost daily.

numinousnymph

yup, i can definitely relate. i was overweight since i was around 7 or 8 years old, got to my highest at 15 years old, then fluctuated back and forth until september 2013 when i was 167 lbs, and i started seriously sticking to changing my diet, and i'm now the slimmest i've ever been as a teen or adult. i went from 192 lbs to currently 125 lbs, at a 5' 4" frame. all my friends and family were always used to me being overweight... so whenever i see them (which usually isn't too often) they always have to comment on my weight. i've had people say, "where's the other half of you?" "you're skin and bones now!" "i'm gonna start calling you 'Slim'" "you disappeared!" "you're not gonna lose any more weight, are you?". i know some of these are compliments....but all it does is make me feel self-conscious that people are looking at my body, as well as reminds me of how big everyone must have seen me before... it's like, when you're bigger, you try to delude yourself that you're not *that* big, that you don't look *that* badly...but once people comment when you lose weight, it's a harsh reminder that, yes, everyone saw you as the fat person you really were. at least, that's how it is for me.

anyways, now i just kind of give a little uncomfortable chuckle and say "thanks", but try to brush it off if their comment makes me uncomfortable.

sentaruu

I, too, get very uncomfortable when someone acknowledges my weight loss. I get especially uncomfortable when they start asking questions. In one hand I'm happy that people notice, that's the whole point right? but keep it to your damn self!

msiamjan

I so hear you. I hate it when people comment, though I know that for the most part they are trying to be encouraging. The one I hate the most--"Wow, you've lost a ton of weight." Truly, at my very heaviest, I never weighed anything close to a ton.

Wookinpanub

I so hear you. I hate it when people comment, though I know that for the most part they are trying to be encouraging. The one I hate the most--"Wow, you've lost a ton of weight." Truly, at my very heaviest, I never weighed anything close to a ton.

That's funny

MinnieInMaine

You have absolutely no control over what other people think or say. You only have control over how you respond.

So...choose to respond in a more positive way. Regardless of what they say or how they say it, I truly believe that most people mean well. They want you to feel good about yourself and know that they notice your hard work. Many people want this validation when they make lifestyle changes - and without knowing you well enough, they assume that this is how you are as well.

People call me "skinny" and tell me I don't have to lose any more and that I'll be invisible if I turn sideways. While I may not agree or appreciate the words they use, I just say thank you and leave it at that. They're happy. I shake it off and get on with my day.

redromad275

You have absolutely no control over what other people think or say. You only have control over how you respond.

So...choose to respond in a more positive way. Regardless of what they say or how they say it, I truly believe that most people mean well. They want you to feel good about yourself and know that they notice your hard work. Many people want this validation when they make lifestyle changes - and without knowing you well enough, they assume that this is how you are as well.

People call me "skinny" and tell me I don't have to lose any more and that I'll be invisible if I turn sideways. While I may not agree or appreciate the words they use, I just say thank you and leave it at that. They're happy. I shake it off and get on with my day.

This^ is spot on. Worry about what you can control. ^

thatjosiegirl

The constant comments are temporary, eventually people will move on and get used to the new you.

Remember you can't change the past or how people used to think of you, that is out of your control now. The only thing you can control is your future. Let go of old insecurities and keep moving forward, you will be glad that you did. :flowerforyou: