New Again

tlorelle12

Hi my name is Theresia. I am a food addict and am here to start fresh. I have years of programs, pills, yo yoing, diet plans, restricting, and other eating disorders under my belt. I have struggled with my weight since I was at least 5. At the age of 12 I weighed over 250 pounds and by the age of 13 had joined Weight Watchers. At this time I was fresh to the weight loss world and healthy eating was new and exciting. After joining WW I went from 220 to 150 in less than a year. When I was 18 I became pregnant with my son and gained 70 pounds. A couple years after having my son (and many diets, tears, and struggles) I was able to lose all the weight I had gained with an additional 20 pound loss. At the age of 22 I became obsessed with exercise and dieting, leading me to anorexia which graduated in to bulimia. Struggling with very severe bulimia for 3 years, I started to attend OA meetings and also began attending AA meetings. At age 25, with the help of my doctor, therapist, dietitian, and AA I was able to beat bulimia. At this time I was also getting sober from a 2 year long binge of opiates and alcohol. I now have 2 years clean and sober, but am left with extra weight and the occasional binge eating episodes (lasting anywhere between a day and 3 weeks... non stop eating of unhealthy zero nutrition food).

A year ago I was able to make a commitment to stop consumption of all processed foods and more commendable: No sugar. I was able to beat the 3 day mark (which is hell) and continue forth for 3 months without sugar. After putting myself in a very messy relationship I lost all motivation and went on a week long nothing but sugar binge. Since this episode I have not been able to recommit myself to any kind of healthy eating plan or exercise plan.

My weight recently became the highest it has been in 2 years. At an unhealthy 190+ pounds I am ready to take action.

I need to surrender and know that when I restrict, over indulge, or punish myself that I am not learning anything (anymore). I can read, watch, and listen to all the health and diet professionals in the world, but without action this is useless. Faith without action is a dream. Action without faith is setting myself up for yet another failure. When I got sober 2 years ago I was finally able to give my need for control and power over the things I could not control over.

Here I am. Twenty seven years old, obese, and out of ideas. I am re-joining myfitnesspal and holding myself accountable. Trusting that my body will be healthy yet again and I will be able to once and for all lose the weight that leaves me feeling tired, unattractive, unmotivated, and above all else ego driven.

Thank you all for being apart of this website and I look forward to the love and encouragement that will be found on these web posts.

Theresia

KLangleydoula

Hi Theresia! What a journey you have had. Feel free to add me for a friend and motivation.