Negative gym experiences
LAT1963
Posts: 1,375 Member
It seems like a lot of people fear going to the gym, fear standing out, being stared at or criticized.
I wondered, has this *ever* actually happened to someone?
The worst things that have happened to me at the gym have been more along the lines of guys hogging the free-weights, not any kind of criticism of my being there.
A gym isn't a high school PE class.![:\](https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/resources/emoji/confused.png ":\")
I wondered, has this *ever* actually happened to someone?
The worst things that have happened to me at the gym have been more along the lines of guys hogging the free-weights, not any kind of criticism of my being there.
A gym isn't a high school PE class.
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The guys definitely hog the weights. Intitally I was stared at as if I am from another planet. But two months into it, most of them are appreciative now and we also alternate weights for exercises now
Everyone falls in line eventually
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- i've had dudebros joke and tell me that the weight machines are in a different part of the gym than where i was.
- i've had a dudebro tell me he was using the bench I was setting up on. on and there was no towel there, no weights on the bar.
- i was once told after a yoga class by some old busy body who wasnt the instructor that i didnt do a certain position right.
- one time in the weight room i think some girl doing floor exercises between the power cages. i warned her that she might want to move. she didnt listen and ended up hitting her head on the barbell and expected me to apologize to her :laugh: and went storming ovr to her boyfriend when i didnt apologize and just put my headphones back on
for the record, none of these things dissuaded me. like any good Cer i welcome any and every opportunity i can tel someone to suck it :laugh:
in over 20 years as a regular gym goer, i've only had 4 negative experiences which makes it a non-issue for me but i could see how others might be dissuaded.
in addition, i purposely choose gyms with good weight rooms so i'm not going to the average meat market type gym. i tried one of those out for a week and never again, it's like mofos thought it was OK to interrupt your workout with some BS pickup line0 -
Well, I caught a dude checking out my butt while I was doing barbell rows, but honestly I considered it an NSV....
Other than, people who make excessive noise for any reason generally get on my nerves, and I've come across that from time to time, but that's about the worst I've experienced.0 -
The "worst" thing that happened to me was when some young guys were hanging around on my squat rack while I went to go fill up my water bottle. Had all my stuff there, so I was like "hey guys, this is my rack" and they laughed and told me that it wasn't actually my rack. So I pretty much said "this is all my *kitten* here, this is my rack. So *kitten* off and get the *kitten* off of my rack." and then I proceeded to get inside the rack anyways and just started squatting.
They left within a few seconds.
So, yeah, sometimes people are douchey or annoying, but as long as you stand up for yourself any time something happens, and realize that you don't need to fear other people/guys, then it's totally fine. If I go up to a guy and ask to borrow a weight, I won't get my head bitten off. I have no problem approaching guys and people now, and they don't seem to have a problem with me. I mean, yeah, I've had guys sometimes ask me if I'm actually using one of the weights at my bench, or I have had guys help (without offering) with deloading the bars or something when I'm handing over the rack to them, or I've had guys help me moving benches before. None of this was done because I asked, I did not display a need for help, they just do it sometimes lol. But often if you go at the same time you wind up working out with the same crowd, and you all become accustomed to each other and I think that helps with being taken more seriously by douchey guys.0 -
i'm certain that bad things can and have happened. and i'm also certain that it's fairly rare.
but you're acting as if an irrational fear can be rationally justified.0 -
I dunno if it's just because of the area I lived in, but I've had a ton of bad experiences at gyms. Everything from someone actually saying "EW" out loud in the locker room when I was changing my shirt, to being told I was too big/not advanced enough to take a zumba class I had been taking for over a month already.
Again maybe it was just the area. I moved further south now most the people I run into - gym and otherwise - are overly friendly.0 -
I'm just there for the racks.0
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None so far. In my current gym they either say hi or are busy with their own stuff. Before joining a gym id say definitely go and have a few visits to make your mind up about the atmosphere and so you pick the right gym for you. They are not all the same.0
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I haven't been to the gym in a couple of years now (been working out at home) but when I did used to go, I can't say I ever had any negative experiences either. The worst was definitely just people who hogged some equipment - like they own the place or something.0
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I've never had a bad experience at a gym, and I was over 400 pounds when I joined my first gym. I don't think anyone at a gym looks down at anyone obese who is taking the initiative to get healthier...on the contrary, I think seeing my big butt sweating buckets on the elliptical probably inspired them!
As someone else said though, the only read bad experience at a gym is waiting for equipmen! I know Planet Fitness has built their entire business model around the "no lunkhead" concept, but personally I'd MUCH prefer working out with an entire gym full of 'lunkheads'. Guys who stick to the mirrors and freeweights grunting away makes it much easier for me to do my workouts than all the 'friendly' people hogging the treadmills just so they can talk to each other at 2mph!0 -
i created my own bad experience just last week - i moved a few months ago, and just joined the local gym last month. Loving it so far, but have been a cardio queen and wanted to get back into strength training. I'm not ready yet to go into the free weights/do heavy lifitng/ etc - all the stuff everyone is always recommending, I want to build up a little strength and some confidence before I do that. So I was going to use some of the weight machines, one of the gym trainers had put together a program for me to follow and showed me how to use the machines - but when i went to do it on my own for the first time the other day, I chickened out. There were lots of guys nearby on the freeweights and a few using the lat pulldown machine and I just felt so self conscious about not just being on the machine but how 'light' my weights are I couldn't do it. I knew they were unlikely to laugh at me but I just felt too embarrassed and self conscious. I know I have to start somewhere and that I shouldn't worry what people think of me, but in that moment I forgot that common sense - will try to put my brave face on and try again this week.0
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Other than my workout partner not liking how I wipe down the machines, no, I've never had any people problems at the gym.It seems like a lot of people fear going to the gym, fear standing out, being stared at or criticized.
I wondered, has this *ever* actually happened to someone?
(Well, there are the guys who grunt, and the guys who slam weights, and the people who don't wipe their equipment, but nothing directed at me.)
But there was a guy who objected to my workout partner wiping down the machine he'd just used (the guy had used it & not wiped it down), and the guy took the bottle of cleaner & sprayed it in my friend's face. He wasn't apparently hurt, but I did tell him to go wash his eyes out, & I called the police to report the assault. Unfortunately, the officers did not arrest the jerk, but did explain that he could have been arrested, jailed, etc. The jerk has pretty much behaved acceptably since then.
Oh, and I've surprised my workout partner a couple times (he really should know me better by now!) with how much I'm lifting. His surprise surprises me, because I've always thought of him as being much stronger than I am.
(ETA: in fact, one of those times a gym staff member, female, was nearby. She heard me ask him to bring me a 45 lb plate, him saying, "you can't lift that much", then had a satsified smirk when I walked over & got the damn plate myself, went back to doing the back extensions I'd been working on.) :bigsmile:0 -
You're right - everyone has to start somewhere. :flowerforyou:i created my own bad experience just last week ...
when i went to do it on my own for the first time the other day, I chickened out. There were lots of guys nearby on the freeweights and a few using the lat pulldown machine and I just felt so self conscious about not just being on the machine but how 'light' my weights are I couldn't do it. I knew they were unlikely to laugh at me but I just felt too embarrassed and self conscious
Unless someone walks by & looks at the machine, nobody is going to know what you're lifting.
If you're worried about it, pull the pin when you leave the machine so nobody knows whether you were using 10 lb or 100.
Or move it from 10 to 100, just to play with people's minds. :laugh:
You don't have to "lift heavy", just lift.wanted to get back into strength training. I'm not ready yet to go into the free weights / do heavy lifitng / etc - all the stuff everyone is always recommending, I want to build up a little strength and some confidence before I do that
When it gets easy to do 2 sets of 12 repetitions, increase 5 lb & go back to doing 8 repetitions.
The second part of my blog post about exercise talks about weightlifting basics.
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/MKEgal/view/2014-06-08-exercise-6670800 -
I've had a couple of girls laughing about how that "that fat ***** is going to break the treadmill." I think they were irked because there were only two treadmills left, one on either side of me. They wanted to be next to each other, but there I was in the middle. If they had asked I would have moved, but instead they were trying to mean girl me away.
I had taken a beginner's yoga class. I had some minor mobility issues with my shoulder, and talked to the instructor before hand. She said to modify as I needed to. At the very end, we were basically laying down in the dark for a few moments. We were supposed to have our arms in a certain position. I had my arms a different way, but was comfortable and not interfering with anyone else. Without warning or permission, she physically forced my arm into the position she wanted. Hurt like mad, I kinda half screamed. I was told later that I "ruined" the class, and not to come back until I can either "handle" yoga or not be dramatic.
I had a man tell me to get my "fat ***" out of HIS lane in the pool for lap swim. He had been staring at me for a few minutes, standing at the end of the pool, checking his watch and glaring at me. There were three other lanes available. Another situation where a simple, polite request and I would have been happy to move. Sadly, the staff backed him up and told me to move.
That doesn't count the things that might be my imagination, like someone giggling when I get on an elliptical or things like that. Those were also at 3 different gyms in my area.0 -
24 hour fitness, Independence, MO... mid-30s male *staff member*. I'm not sure if we're allowed to give out peoples names on this forum or I would. It was about 2 yrs ago.
I walked in and said I wanted membership information. His response:
- a long "up and down" look at me
- flared nostrils and a stifled gigglesnort sounding thing, followed by a hard swallow
- "sure", followed by a trembling lip
I walked right out of there in tears.
I DO want to go to the gym, but it sure as heck *won't* be that one!0 -
My gym is on my university campus, so there is a lot of testosterone and not enough estrogen, so I would often get gawked at. Which is awkward. I took it as a compliment but it did make me really uncomfortable. Now I couldn't care less though...I plan on joining again and being in my own zone instead of being worried about the guys. There would also be the occasional, perfect-butt girl, who would look me up and down with a majorly judgy face, but whatever. You've got to do what you've got to do.0
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You think more estrogen would solve the gawking?
you're sorely mistaken.
I'd say a good 90% of the fears and insecurity's people have are self driven and come from not knowing what they need to be doing.
Once you know what you need to be doing- going in and doing it is easy. No matter you are- or what gym you go to- if you can find the squat rack and the pull up bar- that's all you'll ever need.
I've never had a gym experience so bad I remember it. I'm sure I have gotten annoyed- I mean it's full of people- and people are annoying- but otherwise- it's a complete none issue- even w/o head phones on (can't do certain things with them due to placement of iPod in my shirt/bra).. I don't get harassed- at wost people come up and tell me I'm shaming the boys- or ask me what I'm training for. But no one gives me *kitten*. Although- I'd be amused to see them try.0 -
I go to a university rec center. There are straight out of high school aged people on up to the Silver Sneakers older folks. I've never had a bad experience there. I was self conscious when I first went but that was my own thing and had nothing to do with the other gym goers.0
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I belong to a community gym on a college campus. All ages, shapes and sizes. If I don't like the music playing, I have my MP3. The gym is a mental game -- act like you belong there, and you do. Some people don't wipe down their machines after they sweat on it. When that happens, I take my towel and wipe it down before I use the machines - saving my energy for the workout instead of a confrontation. Sometimes I make a mistake and hit the gym at 2:30p when the baseball team is loitering around and jesting with one another. Not a problem, other than the fact that they loiter in the areas I need to be. Good news is, they scatter when an older woman gets near. I don't chat much at the gym, usually a smile and nod to the regulars.
Attended a zumba class with a middle-aged crowd. Instructor played really raunchy music. Lyrics created some bad energy with racial slurs and insults to women. Attendees kept giving each other knowing glances. I didn't return. Kinda tacky. There's a new zumba instructor and I may try it again. Interested in PiYo now.0 -
I'm just there for the racks.
In for Cranq's rack...
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Hello Independence. I'm Lee's Summit. I avoid the hard-core gym environment, too.0
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You think more estrogen would solve the gawking?
you're sorely mistaken.
I'd say a good 90% of the fears and insecurity's people have are self driven and come from not knowing what they need to be doing.
Once you know what you need to be doing- going in and doing it is easy. No matter you are- or what gym you go to- if you can find the squat rack and the pull up bar- that's all you'll ever need.
No, I don't think that would solve it :P
And you're right - if you don't know what's what, you're a lot more conscious about other people and what they might be thinking about you. Gym should be all about you, doing what you need to do, and whoever has time to stand around and judge you doesn't deserve to be on your radar.0 -
My problem is ME. I get bored and look for someone to talk to while they are exercising. I even have equipment at home (hubby is exercise guru of sorts). But I just hate it. I would rather mow the grass and or do outside and inside work. As for the other people around me..... You can't scare me! I taught middle school... 0
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I've been going to my gym for 5 years, and except for the occasional injury caused by my own spasticity (like hitting myself in the head doing skull crushers) I've never had a bad experience. Everyone just does their own thing.0
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Have my own gym at home now, but when I used to go, I had no problems hanging with the free weight crowd or any other crowd. The only 'bad' experiences I've had in gyms are the 'smells' - I have the nose of a cat...raunchy perfume (that stinky baby powder/diaper smelling one), body odor...and one dude who used to take a dump every morning like clockwork and leave the bathroom door wide open for his stench to waft throughout the gym..this was a smaller gym...a one-person unisex bathroom...not a fan of unpleasant smells. gagg
Love working out at home!!! :bigsmile: :bigsmile: :bigsmile:0 -
Nope! I don't think so.. Well once there were a small group of people laughing at some guy exercising because he was really banging the plates loudly. But that's all. Our gym is very nice
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i created my own bad experience just last week - i moved a few months ago, and just joined the local gym last month. Loving it so far, but have been a cardio queen and wanted to get back into strength training. I'm not ready yet to go into the free weights/do heavy lifitng/ etc - all the stuff everyone is always recommending, I want to build up a little strength and some confidence before I do that. So I was going to use some of the weight machines, one of the gym trainers had put together a program for me to follow and showed me how to use the machines - but when i went to do it on my own for the first time the other day, I chickened out. There were lots of guys nearby on the freeweights and a few using the lat pulldown machine and I just felt so self conscious about not just being on the machine but how 'light' my weights are I couldn't do it. I knew they were unlikely to laugh at me but I just felt too embarrassed and self conscious. I know I have to start somewhere and that I shouldn't worry what people think of me, but in that moment I forgot that common sense - will try to put my brave face on and try again this week.
You really should start on free weights. Strength machines do not mimic real life, and in my experience they don't really transfer over all that much to progress in the weight room. Just start with really light weights and move up if they are too easy, and just keep adding weight until you are no longer able to meet your rep maxes every set. THen work up that weight until you can meet that rep max, then try adding in 2.5-5lbs to the whole thing and use it until you can reach your rep max (if you can't even get out 1-2 reps though, then you'd deload back to the previous weight). Just set up a program for yourself (full body 3x a week is a good starting place) and log your progress.0 -
i normally have my music on so i dont hear others comments
one day thou, the battery had run out but i kept the head phones on.
i overheard 2 guys discussing how the hell anyone could have sex with me. they eventually decided they would have to do me from behind so they wouldnt have to look at me. i wouldnt have touched either of them with a barge pole
i continued my workout pretending i couldnt hear0 -
You really should start on free weights. Strength machines do not mimic real life, and in my experience they don't really transfer over all that much to progress in the weight room.
I think starting with machines is more to make sure that your form is correct before switching to free weights (if you're new to lifting) so that you don't do an exercise wrong or hurt yourself...but free weights are definitely better.i overheard 2 guys discussing how the hell anyone could have sex with me. they eventually decided they would have to do me from behind so they wouldnt have to look at me. i wouldnt have touched either of them with a barge pole
Wow, how ridiculous! Some people, ugh...0
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