So Frustrated....

jazzie_red
jazzie_red Posts: 180 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
I went up to my Boyfriends house this weekend and I did not plan well. I ate and I don't even know how to begin to log in the calories. It seems overwhelming.

He likes to go out to eat.... I can't seem to monitor my calories when we do.

:(

I know it's a problem, but I am unsure how to fix it. He lives in a small town and they don't have a lot of choices. No big chains that have their calorie listings. We go to one off dining establishments when I am there.

I am back on the bandwagon today, but feel like I am starting ALL over again....

I still need to get me a scale. I think that will help me at least track if I am gaining or losing.

Right now I am really working on saying: At least I am going back on track and I am not just throwing in the towel because I "failed" for a couple of days.

Replies

  • lsorci919
    lsorci919 Posts: 772 Member
    when going out to eat at a restaurant that doesn't show you the calories and you can't look them up, I always try to find something on mfp that is the same or similar and go with one of the higher calorie options of that item just to be safe. I know that doesn't solve all issues but it might help a little.
  • Raynne413
    Raynne413 Posts: 1,527 Member
    when going out to eat at a restaurant that doesn't show you the calories and you can't look them up, I always try to find something on mfp that is the same or similar and go with one of the higher calorie options of that item just to be safe. I know that doesn't solve all issues but it might help a little.

    I do the same thing. I also try to box 1/2 up, so I know that I'm not completely going over.

    And since you don't have any information on what you had, you can't call it a failure. Life is unpredictable, and you have to go with the flow. Just keep going!
  • Kalikel
    Kalikel Posts: 9,603 Member
    Have him take it to go and eat at home. That way, you both get to eat what you want. An occasional meal out (like every eight or ten weeks) is good if he must go sit in a restaurant, but you need to stick with it if you're going to lose and if he cannot support you in your struggle, he's not much of a boyfriend.
  • OnTheGround
    OnTheGround Posts: 78
    Back when I first started losing weight, I would only get salad and I'd get dressing on the side. It's pretty easy to track a salad, no matter where it's from. Sure it's not the most fun thing in the world, but do you want to keep stumbling back every weekend and not make progress? That's what I used to tell myself. Until I was able to get a better handle on portions and estimate calories......I just stuck to salad.
  • jazzie_red
    jazzie_red Posts: 180 Member
    He's a GREAT boyfriend. Very kind, funny, and super sweet. And he's tall and has beautiful hair. Annnd, he is an amazing artist!!

    But he also has aspergers, and has a hard time socializing. He does like to go out and be around people, but it's a struggle for him. He likes to go out when we are together because I will talk to EVERYONE, and that kind of helps he to talk to people too. So I really try to support that. What kind of girlfriend would *I* be if I didn't?
  • bigsistruck
    bigsistruck Posts: 125 Member
    Whenever I'm at a Mom and Pop restaurant I will go with the grilled chicken sandwich (plain with no butter on the bun) if they have one. It's always a pretty safe bet. Usually you can get fruit or cottage cheese on the side with it as well.
  • HeidiCooksSupper
    HeidiCooksSupper Posts: 3,831 Member
    Just behave like you think a slender person would when ordering. And don't try to log the days. This is a life style not a penal sentence. Consider it practice for the future.
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 49,024 Member
    Portions matter much more when eating out. Even a high calorie dish on a 9 inch plate is MUCH better than eating a 13 inch plate of it.
    If you're still not sure, sticking to whole foods and vegetables will ALWAYS be a decent choice. Chicken on a salad (even at McDonald's) isn't a very high calorie meal unless you're drenching it in high calorie dressing.

    A.C.E. Certified Group Fitness and Personal Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • stacyjh1979
    stacyjh1979 Posts: 188 Member
    It doesn't make you a bad girlfriend to think of yourself as well. Your health/weight is as important as his Aspbergers. That is great that he wants to go out (my step son has it as well and doesn't do well in social setting but he's still a child) and I think it's wonderful that you want to support him in that manner. Relationships require compromise. Maybe you can limit the number of meals that you go out for or you can find other social outings like taking a walk at a park. Planning ahead is most important so if you know you are going out to eat plan on getting a salad or grilled chicken and try to eat light the rest of the day. You can have a life and still lose weight you just have to be prepared to do whatever it takes.
  • cstroh13
    cstroh13 Posts: 24
    Back when I first started losing weight, I would only get salad and I'd get dressing on the side. It's pretty easy to track a salad, no matter where it's from. Sure it's not the most fun thing in the world, but do you want to keep stumbling back every weekend and not make progress? That's what I used to tell myself. Until I was able to get a better handle on portions and estimate calories......I just stuck to salad.

    this :happy:
    There are usually tons of different varieties of salad and so long as you get your dressing on the side it shouldn't have too much of an impact on your calorie allowance. I know when my husband wants to go out to this expensive restaurant where we live I will order a steak salad. It's a giant salad (so it will fill me up), it looks like too many calories, but it has vegetables and lots of lettuce and those things are actually low in calories. They cut up the steak in thin slices so, there isn't as much on the plate, but it's enough to leave my taste buds satisfied. plus I can "afford" a glass of wine to go with! What I am saying is that salads don't have to be boring. Get one that is exciting and pleasing to your eyes and know that it's probably not going to send you over your allowance.
  • yopeeps025
    yopeeps025 Posts: 8,680 Member


    He likes to go out to eat.... I can't seem to monitor my calories when we do.


    I tell him this is an issue I am working on. If it was so bad I ask for help? Small portion sizes since these places have no nutrition facts. Eat slower. You ever notice how the side salad can come out first? That would help to eat more nutritious foods.
  • jazzie_red
    jazzie_red Posts: 180 Member
    I think I may just go the salad route, or a stock based soup route. It will be easier and I already order my dressing on the side because they tend to drown the salads and I don't like that.

    The half portion thing is what I need to do too. I know that will help. I didn't have good snacks with me and I inhaled my meal because I was so hungry. BAD mistake there too. I guess it's just not going to happen overnight. I will work on it.
  • yopeeps025
    yopeeps025 Posts: 8,680 Member
    I think I may just go the salad route, or a stock based soup route. It will be easier and I already order my dressing on the side because they tend to drown the salads and I don't like that.

    The half portion thing is what I need to do too. I know that will help. I didn't have good snacks with me and I inhaled my meal because I was so hungry. BAD mistake there too. I guess it's just not going to happen overnight. I will work on it.

    That is all you can do is keep doing it and it might become easier. BTW some salad can be high in calories too. I actually had to change the salad I was eating at a restaurant from before. Just keep trying to make good choices that bring you closer to your goal.
  • HerbertNenenger
    HerbertNenenger Posts: 453 Member
    two words: GET SOUP !! And not chowders or bisques. Everyone has chicken noodle soup, or lentil, or french onion. A bowl of soup is very filling and USUALLY less than 300 -400 calories or so.
  • maidentl
    maidentl Posts: 3,203 Member
    I think I may just go the salad route, or a stock based soup route. It will be easier and I already order my dressing on the side because they tend to drown the salads and I don't like that.

    The half portion thing is what I need to do too. I know that will help. I didn't have good snacks with me and I inhaled my meal because I was so hungry. BAD mistake there too. I guess it's just not going to happen overnight. I will work on it.

    I used to have this problem with eating out when we visited my in-laws. Something I would do sometimes is order a baked potato. If you get the toppings on the side and add them yourself then you can go easy on them.

    Of course, I love potatoes, this may sound appalling to you! :laugh:
  • WeepingAngel81
    WeepingAngel81 Posts: 2,232 Member
    I have not been to a restaurant that doesn't have healthier substitutes, such as steamed veggies or fruit rather than fries. Or salads. However, be careful with the salads! I once went to chili's and ordered what I thought was a healthy salad. I didn't plan it ahead, and I didn't have my phone on me to look it up. It ended up being 1,100 calories :noway: I was shocked! Learned my lesson big time there! Also, try going for soups now that it's getting into fall. Chicken noodle or veggie soup is really awesome!
  • darkbrownsuga
    darkbrownsuga Posts: 11
    Don't worry about it. The most important thing is to get back on the horse, which you have already done. We all have those days. I like to exercise more on those "fat days." Just keep looking forward, you will make it. =0}

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