Today is a "fat" day

mkeithley

Today I just feel yucky about myself. I have days where I look at myself and am proud I am healhy and have made positive changes for me and my family. Today was not one of those days. Today was a day where I was repulsed everytime I bent over and there was that hunk of fat, loose jiggly skin hanging over my waistband. My arms had jiggly wings and I was constantly aware of my thighs rubbing toether. Everytime I went in the bathroom I pulled up my shirt, turned sideways and was disappointed with the image in the mirror, then the front pose, why the lovehandles???Then the side pose again, ugh!!! I know it's negative self tapes that I need to replace and usually I can. I don't know why somedays I can get rid of the ugly thoughts and some days they consume me. Today was a day where I wondered if my perception of my physical self image is distorted and today I was seeing myself for how I really look. Am I really not as healthy as I think? Even though I run is it not fast enough/hard enough? For as much as I run I should be in a lot better condition physical appearance wise. The weights, are they making me bigger. I eat clean so why do I feel my middle is getting bigger. Why do I feel like my love handles are always hanging out where ever they can get some free space? Am I insulin resistant?(At least if I was I'd have an excuse for not being "cut"). Has my body not leveled out yet from quitting smoking?
ICK!!!! I feel like I am at least 10 pounds up, maybe 7, but definitely more than 5. Is it water? Or is it really fat? I feel like Ms. Potato Head, skinny long arms and big ole body. My skin looks saggy, my face looks haggard, I'm getting the jowls on my cheeks-ARGH!!!(If you are over 35 you know what I'm talking about with the jowls).
I don't feel good at all. I'm tired and I hate having a belly that won't go away!!!!
Sorry for the "Woe is Me" act and the not very uplifting post, I just needed to get it out.

BTW- I wish the message boards had spell check for the posts

mkeithley

Today I just feel yucky about myself. I have days where I look at myself and am proud I am healhy and have made positive changes for me and my family. Today was not one of those days. Today was a day where I was repulsed everytime I bent over and there was that hunk of fat, loose jiggly skin hanging over my waistband. My arms had jiggly wings and I was constantly aware of my thighs rubbing toether. Everytime I went in the bathroom I pulled up my shirt, turned sideways and was disappointed with the image in the mirror, then the front pose, why the lovehandles???Then the side pose again, ugh!!! I know it's negative self tapes that I need to replace and usually I can. I don't know why somedays I can get rid of the ugly thoughts and some days they consume me. Today was a day where I wondered if my perception of my physical self image is distorted and today I was seeing myself for how I really look. Am I really not as healthy as I think? Even though I run is it not fast enough/hard enough? For as much as I run I should be in a lot better condition physical appearance wise. The weights, are they making me bigger. I eat clean so why do I feel my middle is getting bigger. Why do I feel like my love handles are always hanging out where ever they can get some free space? Am I insulin resistant?(At least if I was I'd have an excuse for not being "cut"). Has my body not leveled out yet from quitting smoking?
ICK!!!! I feel like I am at least 10 pounds up, maybe 7, but definitely more than 5. Is it water? Or is it really fat? I feel like Ms. Potato Head, skinny long arms and big ole body. My skin looks saggy, my face looks haggard, I'm getting the jowls on my cheeks-ARGH!!!(If you are over 35 you know what I'm talking about with the jowls).
I don't feel good at all. I'm tired and I hate having a belly that won't go away!!!!
Sorry for the "Woe is Me" act and the not very uplifting post, I just needed to get it out.

BTW- I wish the message boards had spell check for the posts

beep

Oh, my poor bean friend

I think you look beautiful, and you have an infectious smile that could make a professional mourner laugh. Stop this. Don't make me come up there.

iluvsparkles

ditto my dear on almost everything you said! I tend to also have OCD at times when it comes to doing the mirror routine..feel you there. I also go throu the days where i feel great and healthy and encouraged and ready to go..and it seems like the next day is the complete opposite "its not working, i might as well give up" etc..
You are not alone..just trying to keep your chin up, and knw tha the plan will work, but you have to make i work, and if you are like me, the ocd will do the rest, you just have to have patience and trust in yourself that it is all worth it, and is working!!

mkeithley

I'm going to bed. just sitting here with my belly sprawled out on the couch is not helping the situation. Maybe I'll wake up and have abs you can bounce a quarter off of:laugh:
Maybe tomorrow I'll feel better about the whole body image deal.

PrincessLaundry

AWWWWWWWWWWW!!! Your picture is so sweet and cheery. You have done such a great job. I hate days that are tough. I hope tomorrow feels better! YOU LOOK Marvelous!!!

:flowerforyou: