Morbidly Obese and looking for support and help

Theotherkels

Add me . I started out with over half my body weight to lose....slowly chipping away at it. I've been where you are, with the foot and joint pain and limited exercise options.

The other posters have it right, start small...it'll get easier and friends here can help you on your way

pennyk54166

You have been given so much great advice already. Above all, be kind to yourself. Anyone who judges you does not deserve your time or energy. Find people that you want to be like and befriend them. Have you tried any movements in a pool? the water can be very kind to joints etc.
Any change in life is scary. That is human nature. BUT think of your life a year from now if you don't change a thing. That is what scared me into starting my journey. Remember this is not a temporary thing, it is a lifestyle. Good days, bad days, etc. We are all here to support you and cheer you on. Please send me a friend request if you would like.
When you stand at the bottom of a hill, and you look up, it is so overwhelming. That doesn't mean you don't go up the hill. And if you get a flat tire on your car, do you honestly think, o well and slash the other 3??? I hope not. One step at a time. Even a novel has chapters.
Changing your lifestyle is not punishing yourself. It is treating yourself with the respect that you deserve. No matter what happens...never ever ever give up!!

dejatoo2

I'm not a forum person but I saw your post and had to reply. Don't give up! Don't be afraid to start! I have at least 70 pounds to lose and I've already knocked off about 20 plus pounds--but it's been agonizingly slow, but steady. But I've dropped two dress sizes already and the health benefits have been astounding. My cholesterol is now within normal ranges. I have arthritis and my inflammation levels are now perfectly normal--they used to be 3x normal. And who cares what anyone thinks? At least you're out there trying. I'll echo what everyone else here has said. Log everything you eat & drink--it really makes a huge difference. Log your exercise time too even if it's really minimal (like walking the dog). I found out that I'm actually a really competitive person and that I like knowing I can beat my set calorie count each day (I don't always, but I strive for it). Same with my exercise log. Start slowly-make simple changes--like changing from white bread to whole-grain. I went from colas to diet colas to green tea. Just simple exchanges at first made it easier for me. And if you have a setback, recognize it for what it is--a temporary setback-it does not mean you've failed. I blew out my knee a few months ago and that really slowed down my exercise time and weight loss but I never gave up watching calories and I was able to maintain while my knee recuperated. No, it's not going to be easy or instantaneous,it's a work in progress--but you can do it.

davidgaia

You've done the right thing by just being here!

Follow the other posts here,

1. Count Calories and ensure you don't up your sugar intake by eating low fat food.
2. Learn about the nutritional composition of the foods you eat
3. Talk about the way you feel and ask yourself why, when and how much you eat.
4. Chart!!!!!! It really helps with motivation...
5. Weigh yourself regularly (once a week same time)
6. Get active, walk a little extra each day
7. Set yourself achievable goals
8. Prepare for the bad days
9. Set yourself realistic goals
10. get a stepper (like fitbit)

I've managed to reverse Type 2 diabetes by going Vegan, I have lost 5 stone since Christmas last year, by restricting Calorie intake to 1200 a day ( If you want to go for a better pace, then you should calculate how much you eat daily at the moment, BE HONEST!! Then set yourself a target of around 1500 a day for a woman) I restricted my daily intake by this amount because my initial challenge was to get blood sugar under control, this has been accomplished, and my HbA1C is now 5.2...this is normal..

Set yourself a target of getting to Gym and consider joining classes, if you want there are plenty out there, and it always helps with motivation.

Imagine the body shape you want to have and believe in attaining it, you will achieve it.

Have fun and good luck!!

davidgaia

Totally understand, remember you are who you are and this will never change, you are merely changing the body to allow who you are to shine even more, and for longer...

trm68

go to youtube, look up Leslie Sansone: one mile walk, 2 mile walk,3 mile walk, etc. She only walks with some extra cardio thrown and it works and you do not have to use a gym, works for me....

katrinadulce

I am starting by walking, flat walks first so that it doesn't strain on my hips as much, as well as the food intake.
I am scared.. does that make sense? I am scared people with poke fun at me, I am scared that I am so used to the person that I am that I will not like the person whom I am going to change into....

I lost 112 pounds with diet, time, and walking.
The bad news is that you will get the occasional look from some idiot who wonders what you are doing in a gym or walking around in public in workout clothes. But honestly, most people won't say anything to you. If anyone actually does, it will likely be a fleeting remark by someone whom you will never see again.
The good news is that most people are too wrapped in their own **** to pay any attention to anyone else.
Also, once you start walking and keep walking or if you go to a gym and KEEP GOING, anyone who sees you will eventually recognize you as a regular walker, as a regular gym member, as someone who is serious and committed to moving more, and you will eventually become just another face in the crowd.

*Focus on nutrition and habit forming first:
Don't try 50 things at once, don't try crazy calorie restriction or magic potions. Eat real food and enjoy what you eat.
*Add things before you take anything away:
Plan once a week or twice a month to add one new thing to your diet. Make cauliflower rice instead of grain rice, and see how you like it. Try tofu in a way you have never had it before. Buy a curry a friend recommends. Keep the things you like and think will fit into your lifestyle, and scrap the ones you don't. After you have a wider variety of new and interesting and healthful and REAL foods to choose from, start reducing and/or eliminating things that no longer fit into the life you are making.
*Get moving and keep moving:
Pain is something you will have to live with for now, but you can't let it stop you from moving. You are going to have to push yourself, but you don't want to derail your efforts by ignoring it entirely and hurting yourself. I would suggest shorter distances more often. I don't care if you walk 2 miles or 1/2 a block. Get up and do it twice a day, and build up to 5-6 days a week if you can. TALK TO YOUR DOCTOR. Tell him/her that you are moving more and that you may need help trying to distinguish between pain and injury.

*Finally, Be not afraid:
"Wherever you go, there you are." You can change what you do, how you act, how you move, and how people see you, but you don't really change who you are. I always felt as if being morbidly obese forced you into this odd place where you were either invisible or a spectacle. Often both at the same time. Most of that is due to how people treat you, but some of it is how you allow yourself to be treated. Either way, it is restrictive. I feel better now than I have in my entire life. I always felt confined before. I have less back pain and more mobility, I am less insecure and more confidant. I less restricted in what I can do, less restricted in what I can wear, and no longer concerned with or limited by the perceptions of others. I am FAR freer to be who I am and have always been, and finally comfortable with who that is.

let1179

You can add me, I'm in the same morbidly obese category, just getting walks in for now. Some days come easier than others, as with everything in life. It's not easy, but it will get easier and better! We will do this!

Florida_Superstar

I just wanted to encourage you and wish you the best in making progress toward weight loss and improved health. I agree with what everyone else said -- especially that most of weight management happens in the kitchen, not the gym, so focus on diet before exercise. But one thing that no one mentioned (or I didn't see at least) is maybe you should consider talking to someone about why you overeat...so you can deal with the underlying reasons. You mentioned budget, but if there is money for this, I think it could be helpful. I'm glad you found the My Fitness Pal community. Good luck! :flowerforyou:

happyfeetrebel1

I'm going to echo the others. I had such horrible knees and feet that I could barely move. Leslie Sansone has some great videos for walking, it's her 'walk of the pounds' line, and they're fairly inexpensive on Amazon. I did those in my living room when it was yucky outside, and I walked my street when it was nice.

I also did the aqua aerobics for cardio, to take the impact off my feet, is there a pool somewhere you can use? Even 'running' across the pool will be helpful, and it won't hurt you.

Lastly, log everything you eat and keep it to a reasonable goal. Don't set up something you can's stick to. I am extremely carb sensitive due to a pancreas surgery, so I eat a LOT of cottage cheese, greek yogurt and chicken. See what works for you.

Good luck

persistentsoul

I started MFP 7 weeks ago at 23 stone and am now hovering few pounds above 20 stone. I cut out highly processed foods and am doing a high fat low carb food plan that is mostly paleo and Ketogenic in nature. Years ago at 21 stone my doctor told me i should have gastric surgery to lose weight which would mean i could only eat a tiny amount at any one time after. I really did not want that so i joined a militantly strict 12 step eating disorder group similar to alcoholics anonymous, I was put on a 1200-1500 calorie a day whole food diet. I went down to 13 stone in well under a year. It was very hard because i was ravenously hungry and an emotional wreck a lot of the time. It did not really work for me hence being 23 stone 7 weeks ago. However from that past experience I at least know it can be done without surgery.
Another time when i was much younger i did a meal replacement program which was given the ok by my doctor at 500cal a day, that I found i could not stick to. I was told that as long as nutritional needs are met it is ok for someone who is morbidly obese to start with a bigger than normal calorie deficit. The shakes were horrid though and the personal underlying issues were not addressed.

Since all of that I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. An assortment of medications did nothing to stabilise it and i ended up having a serious mental breakdown and losing almost everything and everyone in my life. One good thing that came out of that was that by then I had messed up my life so much that I was signed off as being unfit for work and finally had the time i needed to do some healing and get help. I had some charitable counselling and NHS therapy. That helped me come to terms with some stuff. More medications for bipolar failed to help. while looking for alternative treatments for bipolar I came across a recommendation for Ketogenic dietary treatment. I decided to give that a shot as it also was touted is being of benefit for various other health problems I have. It is too early on to say if having an impact on most things but it is definitely helping me to lose weight without being hungry all the time so I am happy with it. I have played with it a bit , I tried adding in semi fasting days of eating 500-600cal but that gave me a really bad gallbladder attack apparently due to bile stagnating in gallbladder while not eating so no more fasting for me. Mostly I have been eating between 1000 and 1600 calories a day and that suits me. I am not able to be very active due to long term chronic fatigue and fibromyalgia. For me i am having to rely primarily on dietary changes at this stage but do a bit of walking when I can. I am very pleased with the progress I have made so far.

I have found what works for me is eating whole foods, without any artificial sweeteners or highly processed foods. I have found that eating high fat and low carb has killed my cravings and hunger between meals which is verging on miraculous to me. As I have been told by doctor that a large calorie deficit is ok for me (considering I am morbidly obese) I am not worried about eating below what MFP standard settings tell me. I am not willing to eat anything as low as 500cal a day again but I feel fine between 1000-1500 cal and allow myself to fluctuate within that zone depending on how i feel. As I am not able to be very active I do not eat back activity calories and do not log activity.

Reading on these boards it is clear that what works for different people is very varied and there is not a one size fits all perfect plan. I think it is just a matter of persistent experimentation to find what works for you. You can definitely do it if you really set your mind to it and refuse to give up. If what you try goes wrong then honestly assess why and make adjustments and changes until you find what works, If what works stops working then again honestly look at why and change what needs changing.

Edit
PS . I have had nasty little ****** be rude to me in street and it is very upsetting but it really does say more about them than me. They know nothing about me. It is so unfair to be treated with such cruelty but honestly I believe they are worse off than I am. As someone else said I always wear earphones with my music playing to distract myself. I also try to avoid places and times that i have found most likely to get trouble. I never go walking on Friday or Saturday evenings as that tends to be when drunk abusive people are out terrorising the innocent.

phyllb

Good luck Hun. You can do it. Being here is a great first step. Make sure you have a good quality pair of shoes , as the weight goes down the pain should improve
You are worth it.

keelybird57

I'm just starting out, too. I have 100# to go. I walk some. When I do, nordic poles help keep my knees from hurting. Swimming is my preferred exercise. Talk about embarrassing! 250+ pounds in a bathing suit! But it is easiest on my joints and I get great results! I know that as long as I track, I'll lose. Good luck! Count me as a friend.....you'll be my first.

Leenda62

Log all that you eat and drink on your MFP diary. Get some good supportive friends on MFP and make sure that you support them also as it is a two way thing, You will be surprised how motivated that make you when someone gives you positive feed back. Have an open diary so that your friends can help you with food choices and and alternatives. It takes a little while to get used to the site but if you have friends on here they will help you out. You have come to the right place for one it is free and very supportive the best things to get you started

very good luck

Carol

I could not agree more about the supportive friends. All of my real people friends I have a history of eating and laying around watching TV with. My MFP friends are fresh and have similar issues and goals. Very motivating. Any one feel free to add me.

Leenda62

I was 107 lbs overweight when I started. I have lost 27 pounds, (20 on MFP) It has been SLOW but I am still 27 pounds lighter than I would have been if I had given up because it was taking to long. I have an artificial, hip, arthritis, and fibromyalgia so I have joint pain as well. I had to learn that I could not shield myself from the pain. I was going to hurt regardless of whether I was working at my goal or sitting on my *kitten* on the couch. I found that even though I still have plenty of pain at least now I feel stronger. More unstoppable and more like an athlete. I thought I could do this without exercise but just could not. Keep adding a little bit at a time. It is a feeling that builds on itself. And the eating habits kind of go hand in hand with that for me.

I agree with these other people. LOG EVERY THING! It will help and keep you from being in denial. It is an eye opener as well. I have found for me a diet where I do not eat any sugar or really any grains helped because it keep me full longer, and crave less. Plus it seems to help the pain (some, it is not a miracle cure, I was hoping to feel 20 again). That works for me but a lot of people are different. Don't expect it to happen right away. Any progress is good progress even if it is just better eating habits and exercise habits. Best of luck to you.

Aishteru85

Feel free to add me... I started last year and have never looked back since... i still have a lot to lose..so lets motivate each other!

emcdonie

I am also morbidly obese, anyone may feel free to add me if they wish.

supplemama

go to youtube, look up Leslie Sansone: one mile walk, 2 mile walk,3 mile walk, etc. She only walks with some extra cardio thrown and it works and you do not have to use a gym, works for me....

Yep! I swear by Leslie, her walks are easy to follow, and they work!

jessiedee28

My biggest advice, please don't let being scared that people will poke fun at you hinder your progress. When i first started going to the gym i was scared i would get laughed at but then quickly realized people are there for the same reason you are, to lose weight. I realize you may not be going to a gym and will be out in public but seriously forget everyone else, you are doing this for you and you alone. I've lost 80 pounds and my life has become better because of it, you can do it too. Please keep us posted on your progress and good luck!

jctackett

Here's some advice from someone who was in your position:

1) Log Accurately. Even if you don't log it, your body still knows you ate it.

2) It doesn't happen overnight. Be patient and it'll disappear.

3) If you fail on one day, write it off, get back on the wagon tomorrow. Don't do the whole "well this whole week is a write off"

4) Find things you like that are within your calories goals and it makes it much easier.

5) There is no shame in walking being your only form of exercise. Took me months before I was comfortable running and even now I have to wear an ankle brace because of the pressure my weight put on my joints.

Good luck.

That's an awesome post, man.