I changed my life.
VialOfDreams
Posts: 217
I reached my goal after a 9-month journey, that started on January 15th, 2010. I am 5'6" and back then I weighed 217lbs according to my doctor. When I asked one of the nurses at the clinic what I could do, he told me it's age, and there was nothing I could do. I wish I could show this guy how very wrong he was back then.
Today, I weigh less than 130lbs. (Between 128 and 130 depending on when I weigh myself.) I want to go down to about 117 lbs, but last time I was at 119 I looked pretty unhealthy, so I may just stay at this weight.
It hasn't been easy at all. I've always either been on the very top of the BMI scale, overweight or obese. Yes, I tipped my BMI scale at 35. Obese begins at 30. I've been on diets for as long as I can remember. Even in middle school. I've tried not eating after 6pm, Weight Watchers, doing silly workouts that didn't really help along with extreme diets (even the one that tells you to only eat lettuce and avocado). Nothing worked. I kept relapsing after a maximum of three months, and gained all the weight, plus more back. Then, I moved to Austin when I was hired on by Blizzard where I had my daily free sodas (all three of them), Pluckers, fast food and hot chocolate. Around the same time, I started taking Depo provera. The result: 60 lbs gained within a year. Even after becoming vegetarian, I was still unable to lose the weight, because my diet was messed up. Instead of meat, I had plenty of dairy, fries, grilled cheese sandwiches and veggie burgers on white bread with lots of mayo, salty sweet potato fries and sodas.
Seeing all the thin Hollywood actresses and skinny every-day people walking down the street caused great depression. My self esteem was low... actually, I didn't have one. One thing I am grateful for is that I wasn't suicidal, otherwise bad things would have happened. The internal struggle was immense. I felt trapped in my own body. I wanted to escape to be someone else, I wanted to get rid of my body and replace it with something lean and pretty, like in the not-so-good movie "Surrogates".
This had to stop. When I weighed in at 217 lbs I felt lousy, ugly, disgusting and a true failure. Looking in the mirror on a daily basis was terrible, and not being able to fit in my old clothes was even more difficult, but I kept holding on to the hope that some day I'd be able to drop all that weight. There was a beautiful and inviting gym across the street from me. I kept wanting to check it out, but the procrastinator in me prevented me until a couple days after my doctor's visit.To further motivate myself, I spent a grand total of $500 on a Weight Loss program. I wasn't about to waste all that money, so I had to go through with it. After 12 weeks of intense workouts, I lost 42lbs, the person with the most weight lost in the class. My trainer and my nutritionist told the class that this wasn't temporary. If we wanted to keep the weight off, or if we wanted to keep on dropping weight, we had to change our lifestyle. No more dieting. Instead, we needed to go through an overhaul in our lives. They had us throw out all the junk from our pantry and fill out fridge with healthy foods. In addition, they advised we worked out at least 5 times a week.
After class ended, I panicked. I thought I couldn't do it alone. Especially when I'd hit days when I wouldn't lose weight, I felt I failed again. But just as I was about to quit, I asked myself: "who is in-charge of my life?" The answer was obvious: it was me. I was and I am in-charge of my life. It was finally time to make good use of my stubbornness. A trait that people can find difficult to deal with gave me strength to overcome negative feelings and keep moving on. Take that, cravings and sense of defeat! Yes, I may be stubborn, but you cannot control me! I am in control of my own life, so if I say I will lose all the weight, you should be damned convinced that I WILL! Trust me, I even remember the numbers when I had such moments: 187lbs, 173lbs, 158lbs, 153lbs, 148lbs, 139lbs, 137lbs, 133lbs... But stepping on the scale days later and seeing that I had dropped more weight made me even more motivated. I wanted to keep on going! It gave me strength.
This is truly an amazing moment. I haven't weighed this little since before high school. Is it over, yet, though? No, it's not, because like I said, this was a change of lifestyle.
Today, I weigh less than 130lbs. (Between 128 and 130 depending on when I weigh myself.) I want to go down to about 117 lbs, but last time I was at 119 I looked pretty unhealthy, so I may just stay at this weight.
It hasn't been easy at all. I've always either been on the very top of the BMI scale, overweight or obese. Yes, I tipped my BMI scale at 35. Obese begins at 30. I've been on diets for as long as I can remember. Even in middle school. I've tried not eating after 6pm, Weight Watchers, doing silly workouts that didn't really help along with extreme diets (even the one that tells you to only eat lettuce and avocado). Nothing worked. I kept relapsing after a maximum of three months, and gained all the weight, plus more back. Then, I moved to Austin when I was hired on by Blizzard where I had my daily free sodas (all three of them), Pluckers, fast food and hot chocolate. Around the same time, I started taking Depo provera. The result: 60 lbs gained within a year. Even after becoming vegetarian, I was still unable to lose the weight, because my diet was messed up. Instead of meat, I had plenty of dairy, fries, grilled cheese sandwiches and veggie burgers on white bread with lots of mayo, salty sweet potato fries and sodas.
Seeing all the thin Hollywood actresses and skinny every-day people walking down the street caused great depression. My self esteem was low... actually, I didn't have one. One thing I am grateful for is that I wasn't suicidal, otherwise bad things would have happened. The internal struggle was immense. I felt trapped in my own body. I wanted to escape to be someone else, I wanted to get rid of my body and replace it with something lean and pretty, like in the not-so-good movie "Surrogates".
This had to stop. When I weighed in at 217 lbs I felt lousy, ugly, disgusting and a true failure. Looking in the mirror on a daily basis was terrible, and not being able to fit in my old clothes was even more difficult, but I kept holding on to the hope that some day I'd be able to drop all that weight. There was a beautiful and inviting gym across the street from me. I kept wanting to check it out, but the procrastinator in me prevented me until a couple days after my doctor's visit.To further motivate myself, I spent a grand total of $500 on a Weight Loss program. I wasn't about to waste all that money, so I had to go through with it. After 12 weeks of intense workouts, I lost 42lbs, the person with the most weight lost in the class. My trainer and my nutritionist told the class that this wasn't temporary. If we wanted to keep the weight off, or if we wanted to keep on dropping weight, we had to change our lifestyle. No more dieting. Instead, we needed to go through an overhaul in our lives. They had us throw out all the junk from our pantry and fill out fridge with healthy foods. In addition, they advised we worked out at least 5 times a week.
After class ended, I panicked. I thought I couldn't do it alone. Especially when I'd hit days when I wouldn't lose weight, I felt I failed again. But just as I was about to quit, I asked myself: "who is in-charge of my life?" The answer was obvious: it was me. I was and I am in-charge of my life. It was finally time to make good use of my stubbornness. A trait that people can find difficult to deal with gave me strength to overcome negative feelings and keep moving on. Take that, cravings and sense of defeat! Yes, I may be stubborn, but you cannot control me! I am in control of my own life, so if I say I will lose all the weight, you should be damned convinced that I WILL! Trust me, I even remember the numbers when I had such moments: 187lbs, 173lbs, 158lbs, 153lbs, 148lbs, 139lbs, 137lbs, 133lbs... But stepping on the scale days later and seeing that I had dropped more weight made me even more motivated. I wanted to keep on going! It gave me strength.
This is truly an amazing moment. I haven't weighed this little since before high school. Is it over, yet, though? No, it's not, because like I said, this was a change of lifestyle.
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Replies
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That was so beautiful! I am so happy you were able to find you in all of this! You found strength and perseverance!! Kudos to you and all your accomplishments!0
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Congrats!0
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you sure did! what a nice transformation! this was a good read....especially after all the unhealthy eating I have done this weekend. thanks for sharing and I'm happy for your success!0
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Thank you so much for posting that. I've always been heavy and have always been trying one diet or another. When my boyfriend decided to do this, I was reluctant. Then I started to see results. Then my boyfriend told me that HE could see results in me. I knew I was doing the right thing for my health and my general well being when the man who told me that I was beautiful when I was almost 230lbs was telling me that at 210lbs. I hope to someday reach a goal of 150lbs. It's a little more above what is considered healthy for me, but I think I'll feel comfortable there. Again, thank you so much for sharing! You are now one of my motivators!
Jess0 -
Wow, that is fantastic!!! WTG!!! Keep up the great work.0
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Congratulations!0
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how rewarding your hard work has been! very inspiring.
was the weight loss program through your gym?0 -
You're definitely an inspiration, and I am so happy that you're able to lose the weight; and in my humble opinion, I think you'll have no problem keeping off the weight.0
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You are amazing and an inspiration. I will definitely be taking this message with me. Congratultions on your hard work and success!!0
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Thank you for sharing your story and your life with all of us! And you're right -- it IS a lifestyle change (and not just a temporary "fad").
On an unrelated note: what's the latest word on Diablo III?
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Thank you all for reading my story! I am so happy to have found this website. I'm trying to get my friends to join, because people on these boards truly understand each other and the struggles we all have to go through.
I do have to admit that my weight loss was a bit too fast, because I didn't do it under doctor's supervision. As a result of the rapid weight loss, combined with family history, I developed gallstones, and I spent Christmas in the hospital getting rid of the escapee stones and the gallbladder itself. So, I do strongly recommend that you are supervised by a doctor during your weight loss process.
I respect every single one of you for making a decision to change your lifestyles. I admire your courage. It does take a ton of willpower to do this. So, if you ever need support, or you feel like you can't go on, send me a message. I am here to listen and offer support.
(On an unrelated note: the first rule of Diablo III - don't talk about Diablo III ;P)0 -
That was SO motivating! Thanks for sharing!0
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Congrats! Very motivating and inspiring! More people need to read and understand your journey!0
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amazing journey. Great job0
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amazing journey. Great job0
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This is so amazing. CONGRATULATIONS!!! You will keep it off forever because you are a different person living a different lifestyle. So inspirational!
We started our journey on the exact. same. day.
Charmagne0 -
This is really very inspiring for me. Really, really inspiring. I am currently having a tumultuous journey myself. I joined this site about two years ago, and I've been successful to the point of losing 19 lbs, but I've since gained it all back, and I know why. It's all about accountability, and I've come back searching for the proper inspiration to keep me going. I want to remember that question: "Who is in charge of my life?" Thank you very much! And congratulations!0
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Thanks for sharing your story, truly an inspiration!0
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