New and in need of support/suggestions

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Hi everyone...I'm new to the community and I was hoping to find support and suggestions. I am newly engaged and I think this may be the point where I decide enough is enough. I am not looking to turn into a model, but I don't want to feel ashamed of how I look in a wedding dress. I also want to be healthy enough to have a full life and eventually a family. I weigh 290 and I've struggled with mental illness for several years. Between medication and deteriorated eating/exercise habits, I am feeling really overwhelmed and not exactly hopeful. If anyone has been in the same boat, I would love to hear how you got started on the path to a healthier life. I know I'll need to take it one day at a time and go in baby steps, but even that is easier said than done! I'm going to look around the boards for helpful info, but in the meantime, I would so appreciate if someone could tell me this isn't impossible, silly as that might sound.

Thanks in advance!!

Replies

  • ivygirl1937
    ivygirl1937 Posts: 899 Member
    Options
    I don't know how much I can help yet because I'm just starting too but good for you for deciding to change yourself!! I would definitely reiterate what you said - read, read, read the forums. Some of the stuff is people goofing around, because we all need a little of that sometimes, but a lot of the long-time members have great advice. My favorite thing that they have reiterated over and over is that sugar/fat/take your pick is NOT horrible - just keep your calorie intake under your calorie goal for the day and you will still lose. You don't have to give up everything you love. Basically, moderation is your friend. But like I said, read the board (the WHOLE thread, they usually evolve a lot over the course of the thread so you get more of the long time members chiming in) and welcome!
  • trogalicious
    trogalicious Posts: 4,584 Member
    Options
    1. don't trust the initial setup that MFP provides. If you put in the wrong/inaccurate information, it'll tell you to eat an amount that may not be applicable.
    2. Make sure you eat enough.
    3. Figure out what works for you and is sustainable/healthy/long term.
    4. avoid fads. don't buy in to any "Hey, try the twinkie and vodka diet"
    5. Don't cut out anything now that you don't plan on literally giving up forever.
    6. GET A FOOD SCALE. Weigh everything. No, seriously.
    7. Get an HRM with a chest strap. You'll at least have a better idea of what you're burning. It'll be more accurate than the generic info in the exercise database.. and even more than the cardio machines. This is great for steady state cardio (run/walk/etc)
    8. Don't go balls out. You'll burn out. I see 300 lb people show up here, instantly start working out and cutting their intake SEVERELY... trying to cut out all of their carbs at once.. whatever. Take it slow. Figure out how much you need to eat FIRST in order to lose.. then incorporate exercise.
    9. Don't cardio yourself to death.
    10. Take the information on the forums with a grain of salt. A lot of people that have been here for a while.. and have been successful, may seem jaded. They give out GREAT advice day after day, only to be met with people that refuse to listen.
    11. Eat real food. Not diet food. Not "low fat, sugar free, now without X." It's easier to get/find/count.
    12. don't set time restrictions.
    13. measure yourself weekly. Don't just weigh. Measure and take pictures.
    14 BE PATIENT.
    15. Avoid forum topics that have "1200" in the title. It's just full of butthurt. Lots of it.
    16. If you ask a question on the forum, give as much information as you can ("yes, I have a food scale and weigh my food" is worlds better than "I eat a palm full of miscellaneous boiled chicken parts..sometimes.")
    17. Be honest with yourself and honest with us.
    18. This isn't a game, it's about changing your lifestyle. Do that.

    pretty much that.

    ...and don't fall into the "1200 calorie" vertigo of suck because of:

    the typical MFP users does this:
    1. I wanna lose weight, let's try MFP.
    2. OH! Wow, it tells me I can lose 2 lbs a WEEK? AWESOME!
    3. I just sit at a desk when I'm not working out, I guess I'm sedentary.
    4. MFP tells them 1200 calories, and they don't even eat that.. then they work out on top of it.. creating an even bigger deficit.
    5. Lose a lot, fast, brag about 1200 calorie success.
    6. Come back in a few months trying to figure out why they're dizzy, tired, not losing weight.
    7. Get on the forums, ask why they aren't losing.
    8. Get two responses (I eat 1200 and lose) (I eat 2200 and lose)
    9. Argument ensues about who is right.

    Now. That being said. These threads happen hundreds of times per day. Most times, and I mean really.. seriously.. 95% of the time.. people get the 1200 number because they don't put the right information in when they set up the account. There are a great number of people that are trying to help. I'm one of 'em.

    I'm a hardcore advocate of actually finding out what works for the individual.. by means of other calculators, averages, time, practice, and patience.

    Blanket prescriptions of 1200 calories "because it worked for me" is more harmful to the generic new user than the "figure out what you need to eat." Unfortunately, one is a LOT easier to type.

    Find out what you need: http://scoobysworkshop.com/accurate-calorie-calculator/

    and make sure to read: http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1080242-a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants

    ...and here's another approach.

    Block off 6 weeks. log EXACTLY what you eat for those six weeks, weigh at the beginning, weight at the end. If you've lost, you're eating under your TDEE. If you haven't lost, congrats.. you found your TDEE, if you've gained... then you're above TDEE.

    From there, look at how much you lost or gained and you have a rough estimate of how to shift your intake to balance it out.

    Online calculators are great, but they're just estimates. They give you decent ideas for starting points. From there, it's on you to fine tune it.
  • ivygirl1937
    ivygirl1937 Posts: 899 Member
    Options
    1. don't trust the initial setup that MFP provides. If you put in the wrong/inaccurate information, it'll tell you to eat an amount that may not be applicable.
    2. Make sure you eat enough.
    3. Figure out what works for you and is sustainable/healthy/long term.
    4. avoid fads. don't buy in to any "Hey, try the twinkie and vodka diet"
    5. Don't cut out anything now that you don't plan on literally giving up forever.
    6. GET A FOOD SCALE. Weigh everything. No, seriously.
    7. Get an HRM with a chest strap. You'll at least have a better idea of what you're burning. It'll be more accurate than the generic info in the exercise database.. and even more than the cardio machines. This is great for steady state cardio (run/walk/etc)
    8. Don't go balls out. You'll burn out. I see 300 lb people show up here, instantly start working out and cutting their intake SEVERELY... trying to cut out all of their carbs at once.. whatever. Take it slow. Figure out how much you need to eat FIRST in order to lose.. then incorporate exercise.
    9. Don't cardio yourself to death.
    10. Take the information on the forums with a grain of salt. A lot of people that have been here for a while.. and have been successful, may seem jaded. They give out GREAT advice day after day, only to be met with people that refuse to listen.
    11. Eat real food. Not diet food. Not "low fat, sugar free, now without X." It's easier to get/find/count.
    12. don't set time restrictions.
    13. measure yourself weekly. Don't just weigh. Measure and take pictures.
    14 BE PATIENT.
    15. Avoid forum topics that have "1200" in the title. It's just full of butthurt. Lots of it.
    16. If you ask a question on the forum, give as much information as you can ("yes, I have a food scale and weigh my food" is worlds better than "I eat a palm full of miscellaneous boiled chicken parts..sometimes.")
    17. Be honest with yourself and honest with us.
    18. This isn't a game, it's about changing your lifestyle. Do that.

    pretty much that.

    ...and don't fall into the "1200 calorie" vertigo of suck because of:

    the typical MFP users does this:
    1. I wanna lose weight, let's try MFP.
    2. OH! Wow, it tells me I can lose 2 lbs a WEEK? AWESOME!
    3. I just sit at a desk when I'm not working out, I guess I'm sedentary.
    4. MFP tells them 1200 calories, and they don't even eat that.. then they work out on top of it.. creating an even bigger deficit.
    5. Lose a lot, fast, brag about 1200 calorie success.
    6. Come back in a few months trying to figure out why they're dizzy, tired, not losing weight.
    7. Get on the forums, ask why they aren't losing.
    8. Get two responses (I eat 1200 and lose) (I eat 2200 and lose)
    9. Argument ensues about who is right.

    Now. That being said. These threads happen hundreds of times per day. Most times, and I mean really.. seriously.. 95% of the time.. people get the 1200 number because they don't put the right information in when they set up the account. There are a great number of people that are trying to help. I'm one of 'em.

    I'm a hardcore advocate of actually finding out what works for the individual.. by means of other calculators, averages, time, practice, and patience.

    Blanket prescriptions of 1200 calories "because it worked for me" is more harmful to the generic new user than the "figure out what you need to eat." Unfortunately, one is a LOT easier to type.

    Find out what you need: http://scoobysworkshop.com/accurate-calorie-calculator/

    and make sure to read: http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1080242-a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants

    ...and here's another approach.

    Block off 6 weeks. log EXACTLY what you eat for those six weeks, weigh at the beginning, weight at the end. If you've lost, you're eating under your TDEE. If you haven't lost, congrats.. you found your TDEE, if you've gained... then you're above TDEE.

    From there, look at how much you lost or gained and you have a rough estimate of how to shift your intake to balance it out.

    Online calculators are great, but they're just estimates. They give you decent ideas for starting points. From there, it's on you to fine tune it.


    ^ THIS. Seriously, this. Read it about 5 times. No, really. I'm pretty sure I read this in another thread somewhere and it is the best advice.
  • leomcdee
    leomcdee Posts: 60 Member
    Options
    Hey!

    Welcome and well done for signing up, the first step is always the hardest!

    I have pretty severe MH problems myself - OCD, depression and anxiety. I went on some tablets last year (with weight gain as a side-effect), and started eating for comfort and must've piled on 14lbs in 9 months. I was already slightly overweight, so it was a bit of a shock to the system.

    I've found that eating right and exercising has made a HUGE difference to how I feel day-to-day. Plus, getting more exercise is knocking me out at night and that quality sleep is priceless.

    Today I went for a massive swim, had a healthy breakfast, lunch and dinner and ate 6 oreos, just because I wanted them. I treat myself to something every day (I have to buy individual portions as I have a tendency to binge. It's something I'm working on) and I refuse to give up the foods I love. But I'm still losing! It's basically a miracle :wink:

    Anyway, congrats on your engagement and best of luck to you, if you really want it, you'll reach your goals. I promise!
  • trogalicious
    trogalicious Posts: 4,584 Member
    Options
    1. don't trust the initial setup that MFP provides. If you put in the wrong/inaccurate information, it'll tell you to eat an amount that may not be applicable.
    2. Make sure you eat enough.
    3. Figure out what works for you and is sustainable/healthy/long term.
    4. avoid fads. don't buy in to any "Hey, try the twinkie and vodka diet"
    5. Don't cut out anything now that you don't plan on literally giving up forever.
    6. GET A FOOD SCALE. Weigh everything. No, seriously.
    7. Get an HRM with a chest strap. You'll at least have a better idea of what you're burning. It'll be more accurate than the generic info in the exercise database.. and even more than the cardio machines. This is great for steady state cardio (run/walk/etc)
    8. Don't go balls out. You'll burn out. I see 300 lb people show up here, instantly start working out and cutting their intake SEVERELY... trying to cut out all of their carbs at once.. whatever. Take it slow. Figure out how much you need to eat FIRST in order to lose.. then incorporate exercise.
    9. Don't cardio yourself to death.
    10. Take the information on the forums with a grain of salt. A lot of people that have been here for a while.. and have been successful, may seem jaded. They give out GREAT advice day after day, only to be met with people that refuse to listen.
    11. Eat real food. Not diet food. Not "low fat, sugar free, now without X." It's easier to get/find/count.
    12. don't set time restrictions.
    13. measure yourself weekly. Don't just weigh. Measure and take pictures.
    14 BE PATIENT.
    15. Avoid forum topics that have "1200" in the title. It's just full of butthurt. Lots of it.
    16. If you ask a question on the forum, give as much information as you can ("yes, I have a food scale and weigh my food" is worlds better than "I eat a palm full of miscellaneous boiled chicken parts..sometimes.")
    17. Be honest with yourself and honest with us.
    18. This isn't a game, it's about changing your lifestyle. Do that.

    pretty much that.

    ...and don't fall into the "1200 calorie" vertigo of suck because of:

    the typical MFP users does this:
    1. I wanna lose weight, let's try MFP.
    2. OH! Wow, it tells me I can lose 2 lbs a WEEK? AWESOME!
    3. I just sit at a desk when I'm not working out, I guess I'm sedentary.
    4. MFP tells them 1200 calories, and they don't even eat that.. then they work out on top of it.. creating an even bigger deficit.
    5. Lose a lot, fast, brag about 1200 calorie success.
    6. Come back in a few months trying to figure out why they're dizzy, tired, not losing weight.
    7. Get on the forums, ask why they aren't losing.
    8. Get two responses (I eat 1200 and lose) (I eat 2200 and lose)
    9. Argument ensues about who is right.

    Now. That being said. These threads happen hundreds of times per day. Most times, and I mean really.. seriously.. 95% of the time.. people get the 1200 number because they don't put the right information in when they set up the account. There are a great number of people that are trying to help. I'm one of 'em.

    I'm a hardcore advocate of actually finding out what works for the individual.. by means of other calculators, averages, time, practice, and patience.

    Blanket prescriptions of 1200 calories "because it worked for me" is more harmful to the generic new user than the "figure out what you need to eat." Unfortunately, one is a LOT easier to type.

    Find out what you need: http://scoobysworkshop.com/accurate-calorie-calculator/

    and make sure to read: http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1080242-a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants

    ...and here's another approach.

    Block off 6 weeks. log EXACTLY what you eat for those six weeks, weigh at the beginning, weight at the end. If you've lost, you're eating under your TDEE. If you haven't lost, congrats.. you found your TDEE, if you've gained... then you're above TDEE.

    From there, look at how much you lost or gained and you have a rough estimate of how to shift your intake to balance it out.

    Online calculators are great, but they're just estimates. They give you decent ideas for starting points. From there, it's on you to fine tune it.


    ^ THIS. Seriously, this. Read it about 5 times. No, really. I'm pretty sure I read this in another thread somewhere and it is the best advice.
    :drinker: :flowerforyou:
  • lisanangel
    lisanangel Posts: 148 Member
    Options
    Hi my name is Lisa feel free to add me..I'm on daily trying to lose my last 27 pounds. We can do this:smile::heart:
  • nicoledawn558
    nicoledawn558 Posts: 1 Member
    Options
    This isn't impossible! You can do it! That is what I keep telling myself. I have been slacking off the past few weeks and I can feel the difference. So I made myself get back into the grove of making healthy choices and going to the gym. I'm not going to lie some days I have to give myself a hard talking to! One thing I started doing that has helped me a lot is Ideal Shape. I eat one of their bars for breakfast and drink a shake for lunch and have a healthy dinner. That way I don't have to stress about planing what I am going to eat for two of my meals. I stay busy between work, school, and my two year old so having two meals that are super easy makes my life so much easier! You can add me if you would like :-) Just remember you can do this! Just take one day at a time!

    Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'! - Audrey Hepburn
  • sardelsa
    sardelsa Posts: 9,812 Member
    Options
    1. don't trust the initial setup that MFP provides. If you put in the wrong/inaccurate information, it'll tell you to eat an amount that may not be applicable.
    2. Make sure you eat enough.
    3. Figure out what works for you and is sustainable/healthy/long term.
    4. avoid fads. don't buy in to any "Hey, try the twinkie and vodka diet"
    5. Don't cut out anything now that you don't plan on literally giving up forever.
    6. GET A FOOD SCALE. Weigh everything. No, seriously.
    7. Get an HRM with a chest strap. You'll at least have a better idea of what you're burning. It'll be more accurate than the generic info in the exercise database.. and even more than the cardio machines. This is great for steady state cardio (run/walk/etc)
    8. Don't go balls out. You'll burn out. I see 300 lb people show up here, instantly start working out and cutting their intake SEVERELY... trying to cut out all of their carbs at once.. whatever. Take it slow. Figure out how much you need to eat FIRST in order to lose.. then incorporate exercise.
    9. Don't cardio yourself to death.
    10. Take the information on the forums with a grain of salt. A lot of people that have been here for a while.. and have been successful, may seem jaded. They give out GREAT advice day after day, only to be met with people that refuse to listen.
    11. Eat real food. Not diet food. Not "low fat, sugar free, now without X." It's easier to get/find/count.
    12. don't set time restrictions.
    13. measure yourself weekly. Don't just weigh. Measure and take pictures.
    14 BE PATIENT.
    15. Avoid forum topics that have "1200" in the title. It's just full of butthurt. Lots of it.
    16. If you ask a question on the forum, give as much information as you can ("yes, I have a food scale and weigh my food" is worlds better than "I eat a palm full of miscellaneous boiled chicken parts..sometimes.")
    17. Be honest with yourself and honest with us.
    18. This isn't a game, it's about changing your lifestyle. Do that.

    pretty much that.

    ...and don't fall into the "1200 calorie" vertigo of suck because of:

    the typical MFP users does this:
    1. I wanna lose weight, let's try MFP.
    2. OH! Wow, it tells me I can lose 2 lbs a WEEK? AWESOME!
    3. I just sit at a desk when I'm not working out, I guess I'm sedentary.
    4. MFP tells them 1200 calories, and they don't even eat that.. then they work out on top of it.. creating an even bigger deficit.
    5. Lose a lot, fast, brag about 1200 calorie success.
    6. Come back in a few months trying to figure out why they're dizzy, tired, not losing weight.
    7. Get on the forums, ask why they aren't losing.
    8. Get two responses (I eat 1200 and lose) (I eat 2200 and lose)
    9. Argument ensues about who is right.

    Now. That being said. These threads happen hundreds of times per day. Most times, and I mean really.. seriously.. 95% of the time.. people get the 1200 number because they don't put the right information in when they set up the account. There are a great number of people that are trying to help. I'm one of 'em.

    I'm a hardcore advocate of actually finding out what works for the individual.. by means of other calculators, averages, time, practice, and patience.

    Blanket prescriptions of 1200 calories "because it worked for me" is more harmful to the generic new user than the "figure out what you need to eat." Unfortunately, one is a LOT easier to type.

    Find out what you need: http://scoobysworkshop.com/accurate-calorie-calculator/

    and make sure to read: http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1080242-a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants

    ...and here's another approach.

    Block off 6 weeks. log EXACTLY what you eat for those six weeks, weigh at the beginning, weight at the end. If you've lost, you're eating under your TDEE. If you haven't lost, congrats.. you found your TDEE, if you've gained... then you're above TDEE.

    From there, look at how much you lost or gained and you have a rough estimate of how to shift your intake to balance it out.

    Online calculators are great, but they're just estimates. They give you decent ideas for starting points. From there, it's on you to fine tune it.

    ^So much this. Learn it. Know it. Live it