This lifestyle change is murdering me mentally

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  • Pimpmonkey
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    I've been through it. My husband needed to drop below 1000 MG of sodium for a period at the advice of his doctor. His family actually called the police and told them I was trying to starve him to death (never dropped below 1600 calories mind you, just a sodium limitation not food itself). Needless to say we don't eat at their house anymore but we kept at it and it nearly drove us crazy between family and figuring what he could nd couldn't have and adjusting our entire way of looking at food. You can do it, too, I know you can.
  • yo_andi
    yo_andi Posts: 2,178 Member
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    Life happens, your numbers are going to be in the red, your sodium will be all over the place. It.Takes.Time. No really, say it with me, It.Takes.Time.

    Keep doing the work, eventually you'll get into a rhythm and before you know it, BAM, no more low sodium diet and just regular old watching what you eat and moving around a bit more will help you stay at a healthy weight. The most important thing you can do is to focus on the forest, not the trees. Don't get so mired in the details that you eventually lose sight of the important things.
  • marimeg
    marimeg Posts: 19 Member
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    You guys are very perceptive in catching the Anxiety-riddled nature of this post. I do have General Anxiety Disorder (aren't I a hot-mess of ailments?).

    Again, THANK YOU. Reading this thread has been such an EYE opener, you have no idea. I'm not going to say it will stop the obsessing because if I could figure out how to stop the anxiety I would have done it in other parts of my life by now ;) but I now have something to go back and read. A whole log of encouragement and practical advice and I can't tell you how much that means to me.

    You all rock so much.
  • catthecar
    catthecar Posts: 1 Member
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    I'm sure this has been said before, but it gets easier! Give yourself time to get used to entering everything. Before long, it will be instinctual, and you won't have to worry about everything you eat. Eventually, you won't mind the red numbers, because you will anticipate them before you see them (because occasionally it's just worth it), and you will know that you'll do better next time. Everyone is in the red sometimes. Just think of it as a good reminder.
  • MelissaPhippsFeagins
    MelissaPhippsFeagins Posts: 8,063 Member
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    Thank you all so much for your words of support! I have a sneaking suspicion that this Doctor will roll her eyes and tell me to suck it up, that it's for my health and don't I want to be healthy?

    Perhaps I'm just being a bit negative about the whole thing right now. This is a wonderful community, thank you!

    I fired a doctor.for telling me to suck it up and hired one who cares about my health and listens to me. I understand that wanting to you to lose is better than one who thinks you're too limited to do anything except take drugs for the rest of your life, but your doctor's job is to help you meet your goals, not to make you stress over them. Be honest with your doctor when you go back and ask for a more moderate sodium goal.

    To lower your sodium intake without making yourself and your family crazy, eat more fresh fruits and veggies. Steam the veggies and replace added salt with pepper.or other spices that you like. Saute them in olive, canola, coconut or sesame seed and pull yours off the pan before adding salt for the family. (Or just skip it, flavorful oils and spices do wonders in a saute pan. Save the salt for tendering meats.)

    Good luck on your journey. I'm living proof you can do it and maintain it.
  • VelveteenArabian
    VelveteenArabian Posts: 758 Member
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    Are you eating a lot of packaged meals? If so, that will absolutely make it difficult to keep your sodium low.
  • joannlohr9
    joannlohr9 Posts: 17 Member
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    I was in a similar situation when I first started stressing about what food I eat, I tend to be very stubborn and didn't want to "fail" at it. I realized two things which is why I joined here..one was that there will be days when you eat things you shouldn't go over you calories etc and its ok you are making the effort you are aware that where your strayed and your calories start over in the morning so you don't have to be perfect at it. The other was if I took the time a few minutes every day or 20mins at the beginning of the week to prelog my food for the week it was so much easier for me, I knew what I was going to eat, and what I needed to buy at the grocery store so I wasn't wasting money or going back to my comfort zone and picking up the high calorie food I used too. I hope that helps!
  • LAT1963
    LAT1963 Posts: 1,375 Member
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    I would really encourage you to speak to your doctor about these feelings - that is not normal. I mean, when I was losing, it would kinda bug me to see the red numbers, but it definitely shouldn't make you feel like all your meals are battle grounds. It sounds like you're developing an unhealthy relationship with tracking and with food, and that can be a dangerous line to toe. I mean, lots of us can relate to wanting to whine a bit about stuff regarding our journeys, but yeah - this is all very concerning to me.

    1200mg sodium is VERY low. If you go above it a little bit, it's not going to be the end of the world - I promise! And if it is a serious problem your doctor will give you some pointers on how to make improvements. You've been at this a week and a half, no one is an expert in this stuff from the get-go.

    Shoot me a FR if you need support.

    This. But don't shoot me a friend request because at the moment I'm at capacity for giving my friends the level of attention they deserve.
  • lisabinco
    lisabinco Posts: 1,016 Member
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    It IS difficult to get a diet on low sodium.
    You'll get there, though. I keep my sodium around 1000 mg/day because of high blood pressure issues, and I am able to stay off of any pills at all. For me, getting the excess sodium out of my food was the key to normal blood pressure.
    It took me several months to really get a handle on how and what to eat (and not eat) to keep my sodium intake low. But I did it and now it's second nature to me. You will do it, too, if it's important enough to you. MFP is a great tool for tracking sodium. It really makes you see where the sodium really hides in all sorts of foods.
    You will eventually notice that your taste buds have changed. You will actually taste so much more than you did before. That surprised me. Now my food is so flavorful, fruits are sweet, vegetables have unique flavors. Who knew? I'm very happy with the change.
    Hang in there. As with most things, if you want it bad enough, you'll get there.
  • alligatorrawr
    alligatorrawr Posts: 144 Member
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    Hello, all.

    I just need a moment to whine a little. I started out at 275lbs, I'm 26 yrs old, and I'm on high blood pressure medication (a water pill). A little about myself, as well. I have severe scoliosis in the reverse 'S' shape. The curves in my spine are 70 degrees and 90 degrees. I am very limited on what I can do in core work outs and one lung is severely squished into my ribcage. This isn't an excuse as to why I'm this morbid size, but just an indicator of my limitations. I work through them! My first doctor was happy to just put me on the medication and call it a day, but I recently switched care providers due to insurance, and my current doctor was like 'You're morbidly obese, you need to lose at least 100lbs, you're going on a low sodium diet.'

    I am currently working on a 1200mg a day sodium diet. My Fitness Pal has me at 1440 calories intake a day and I'm usually well below that (doc said 'at your heavy weight, I would really like to see only 1200 intake, but I guess that will do for now.) It has been ten days and I've lost around 9 lbs. So why is this so challenging?

    I am stressing so MUCH about EVERYTHING that goes into my mouth. I'm on this website more than anything, looking up calories and sodium, that I have successfully annoyed my mother to the point of remarks such as 'Rome wasn't built in a day, you have to stop obsessing so much, you'll be fine.' But I have to show this diary to my doctor on October 6th and I want to do well, I want to show her that I am doing well.

    What started off this rant and why do I say it's murdering me mentally? Because I feel like a -failure- when my numbers go red, like they did today in sodium. I know I have to add a little more to it, and that just makes me so sad. I am currently at work, so I haven't exercised yet but right now, at this very moment in time, I feel like I should run myself into the ground and drown myself in 12 cups of water so I can balance out going over in the sodium category. I am so stressed. Every single meal is like a battle ground, strategically advancing until I'm cornered in and shaking because I know I have to eat, but in doing so the numbers won't be right and then I'll have less progress to show my doctor. Adding on to that is the fact I have alienated my whole family with 'how much sodium does it have?' that I'm getting that LOOK. That look that means they are disgusted and tired of hearing the word -sodium-. They want me to reach my goals. They love me and are proud that I'm working on it, but they think I'm being too extreme, when I'm really just being healthy. I mean, if you look through my food diary, it's not the diary of someone with an eating disorder.

    In controlling what I eat and watching every single ounce, I feel like I'm slowly going mad. The more control I gain over how and what and how much I consume, the less in control of everything else I feel.

    if your sodium intake is a little high, relax it could have been lower yesterday! and just drink another glass of water and flush it out. sodiums just salt! it makes you retain water so if you drink a little extra water it'll flush out! or sweat extra. I get dehydrated so easily that I don't mind a little extra sodium it keeps me from passing out
  • Icandoityayme
    Icandoityayme Posts: 312 Member
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    I can totally relate to this. Some days it makes me miserable because when I see those numbers in the sodium go red and I get really upset about it or when I go over on calories at all. I am not on a low sodium diet myself but something about those red numbers just bothers me to death. I know I am irritating people because I get so picky on what I am eating but not being picky to begin with is what got me in this mess. I am starting to get better with not letting it make me so upset I want to cry because it doesn't look perfect to me and it's been 3 months of me doing this. Don't give up on this. In the long run this won't be a problem anymore. You will know what to do and how to do it and you know there are supportive people here who want to help and encourage. It will get better.
  • alligatorrawr
    alligatorrawr Posts: 144 Member
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    It IS difficult to get a diet on low sodium.
    You'll get there, though. I keep my sodium around 1000 mg/day because of high blood pressure issues, and I am able to stay off of any pills at all. For me, getting the excess sodium out of my food was the key to normal blood pressure.
    It took me several months to really get a handle on how and what to eat (and not eat) to keep my sodium intake low. But I did it and now it's second nature to me. You will do it, too, if it's important enough to you. MFP is a great tool for tracking sodium. It really makes you see where the sodium really hides in all sorts of foods.
    You will eventually notice that your taste buds have changed. You will actually taste so much more than you did before. That surprised me. Now my food is so flavorful, fruits are sweet, vegetables have unique flavors. Who knew? I'm very happy with the change.
    Hang in there. As with most things, if you want it bad enough, you'll get there.

    my favorite part about the healthy routine is when you crave something you actually need it. right now I crave bad foods and if I give in I feel worse after. but when I was healthy I craved something, (usually Milk) gave in, and it felt like I had just taken the worlds most refreshing nap!! Can't wait for those feelings again haha
  • alligatorrawr
    alligatorrawr Posts: 144 Member
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    Take the red numbers with a grain of salt.

    (sorry I had to)
  • mimiteh35
    mimiteh35 Posts: 486 Member
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    I too am working on reducing my sodium, my getting healthy started because of my high BP and dr. telling me either lose weight or get on BP meds.

    So, in response to this, I know it sounds mundane, but maybe for a while you should pre-plan meals? Especially breakfast and lunch? Take day when you have some time off and go through some of your foods that you could eat every day for a week that won't make you go MEH and figure out the sodium, then do the same for lunch (or whatever meal is one you can pre-prep for yourself) and then you won't have to worry so much about the sodium because you'd only have to worry about 1 meal a day for sodium intake, especially if you keep your breakfast/lunch meals and snacks very low sodium.

    It will be a pain in the butt to eat the same things, but after a while you will notice that when you DO have high sodium, you feel so bloated that you don't want to put that much into your body! That's what helps me! I stopped cooking with salt, or very very low salt if I have to cook with it. I have discovered other seasonings that are delish!

    Also, beware of things that are "low fat" or "fat free" because sometimes they have more sodium!! I've learned that the hard way myself! Also, of course, food eaten while dining out tends to have a ton of sodium, too. I try to choose salads when eating out if my sodium level is already too close to the red.

    You CAN do this! Even if you ARE obsessing, its because you want to get healthy, and instead of giving you "the look" maybe your family can help by watching the sodium some themselves. What I do with my family, I cook without the salt, and they can add the salt to taste later, and no one has complained because they know I'm trying to reduce my sodium.

    Just some suggestions from someone else who is working on reducing the sodium! Good luck, hang in there!!! You're doing great so far!

    I get you about seeing that red, but while I'm kind of disappointed that your family is giving you "the look" I also know from my end that no one realizes HOW much sodium is in every little thing!! I didn't even realize the more SWEET something is, it usually has a lot of sodium, who knew???
  • TatianaMacKenzie
    TatianaMacKenzie Posts: 23 Member
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    Did your Dr. recommend going to a nutritionist? Perhaps consulting one might help re choice of food and especially meal planning? And take it one day at a time. Just because you might go "red" in a category one day by a few numbers, does not mean that over time there will be no progress. Congratulations on your progress so far. I tell myself that Rome was not built in a day (it helps as I do not lose quickly but the trend is downwards)!
  • Skout528
    Skout528 Posts: 17 Member
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    I can tell you as a health professional that doctors are going to give you this number to shoot for that they KNOW will produce results, but they will not (and usually cannot, since it's not their training) give you the slow, healthy path to get there. Doctors are good for medication and overall LONG TERM goals, but they are not good at telling people how to achieve them. Listen to your doctor about certain things, do NOT obsess because they have a dictionary in their brains of numbers, like 1200mg sodium. My whole outlook this time is: every healthy thing I am doing counts. Today, I had McDonald's fries with dinner. In the past I would have gotten so upset at myself for 'cheating', I would have bought the entire combo just to punish myself, then given up my diet completely. But, I just bought the fries and a diet coke, and I'm not upset about it.
  • chickwithpencil
    chickwithpencil Posts: 26 Member
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    Doctors did the same to my dad once, and it made him completely miserable. They basically just restricted him from everything, but never actually told him what he could eat, so he tried eating less of the same foods and without adding any salt. It didn't work out very well. Myself, I'm on a fairly restrictive diet - lactose-intolerant, sensitive to beef, eggs, artificial sweeteners, MSG - so I understand how rough it can be, especially at first. Lots of label reading, groaning, family getting frustrated with "well, what CAN you eat?" that kind of thing? It does get a lot easier, though, as time goes on. Eventually, you'll get into a bit of a routine with it, and the cravings and taste for things (salt, for example,) will go away.

    Maybe try to look at the restrictions you have as an opportunity instead? Look up new recipes and try them, along with trying new healthy foods (for example, I found I love kale and sweet potatoes, but also discovered that I think quinoa tastes a little like cardboard.) Attempt to bake your own bread, or make popcorn the old-fashioned way - for me, the whole "learning a new skill" made it even more satisfying. Experiment with spices other than salt. And above all, try not to stress over it (and yes, I know this is hard.)

    Your doctor. Wow. My suggestion is that if she's not at least somewhat supportive and happy over the 9 pounds (you've no doubt already lowered your BP a bit with that,) and doesn't respond to your concerns of stress over eating, it might be time to find another doctor. There's a fine line between being blunt, and being a bully and from what you say, she seems to be straddling it a bit. Negative reinforcement doesn't work for everyone, and above all, you need someone who will listen to your concerns and someone who won't do you more harm than good in the long run. <3
  • DanaLash
    DanaLash Posts: 59 Member
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    Hello, all.

    I just need a moment to whine a little. I started out at 275lbs, I'm 26 yrs old, and I'm on high blood pressure medication (a water pill). A little about myself, as well. I have severe scoliosis in the reverse 'S' shape. The curves in my spine are 70 degrees and 90 degrees. I am very limited on what I can do in core work outs and one lung is severely squished into my ribcage. This isn't an excuse as to why I'm this morbid size, but just an indicator of my limitations. I work through them! My first doctor was happy to just put me on the medication and call it a day, but I recently switched care providers due to insurance, and my current doctor was like 'You're morbidly obese, you need to lose at least 100lbs, you're going on a low sodium diet.'

    I am currently working on a 1200mg a day sodium diet. My Fitness Pal has me at 1440 calories intake a day and I'm usually well below that (doc said 'at your heavy weight, I would really like to see only 1200 intake, but I guess that will do for now.) It has been ten days and I've lost around 9 lbs. So why is this so challenging?

    I am stressing so MUCH about EVERYTHING that goes into my mouth. I'm on this website more than anything, looking up calories and sodium, that I have successfully annoyed my mother to the point of remarks such as 'Rome wasn't built in a day, you have to stop obsessing so much, you'll be fine.' But I have to show this diary to my doctor on October 6th and I want to do well, I want to show her that I am doing well.

    What started off this rant and why do I say it's murdering me mentally? Because I feel like a -failure- when my numbers go red, like they did today in sodium. I know I have to add a little more to it, and that just makes me so sad. I am currently at work, so I haven't exercised yet but right now, at this very moment in time, I feel like I should run myself into the ground and drown myself in 12 cups of water so I can balance out going over in the sodium category. I am so stressed. Every single meal is like a battle ground, strategically advancing until I'm cornered in and shaking because I know I have to eat, but in doing so the numbers won't be right and then I'll have less progress to show my doctor. Adding on to that is the fact I have alienated my whole family with 'how much sodium does it have?' that I'm getting that LOOK. That look that means they are disgusted and tired of hearing the word -sodium-. They want me to reach my goals. They love me and are proud that I'm working on it, but they think I'm being too extreme, when I'm really just being healthy. I mean, if you look through my food diary, it's not the diary of someone with an eating disorder.

    In controlling what I eat and watching every single ounce, I feel like I'm slowly going mad. The more control I gain over how and what and how much I consume, the less in control of everything else I feel.

    Girl! Those ARE some major obstacles! Have you thought about just setting little goals as you go? Like, breakfast goal: this many calories, this many mg's of sodium. Morning workout: this many minutes. When you achieve that, set the next goal. Just take it a goal at a time. You are doing this for YOU. If your doctor says you're doing things right and that you're doing this the healthy way, then just keep on keeping on. That is all you can do. I'm sure your family is proud of you, but you can't expect your family to truly understand a situation that they've never been in. Be open with them. Tell them what you need. Let them know that their support is important to you, but be careful not to ask for something that they can't provide. Maybe just ask them for words of encouragement. You should be proud of your hard work. You go girl. Message me anytime, I'd be happy to chat with you! I think it is really impressive what you're accomplishing! :)
  • kmash32
    kmash32 Posts: 275 Member
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    I think your doctor needs to update his knowledge, there have been a few recent studies over the last several years that state that lowering your sodium intake doesn't have as much of an effect on your blood pressure as they thought, that weight is far more important. Also the CDC says you only need to go as low as 1500 so not sure why your doc says 1200.

    I agree with everyone that says work your way to 1200. I see a nutritionist as I have insulin resistance and PCOS and need to lower my carbs. She said instantly trying to drastically reduce something in your diet is a sure fire way to fail. She has me working on switching everything to complex carbs and slowly lowering my carb count over time.