Feel like I have lost myself under my layers of fat!

cazziecoo
cazziecoo Posts: 29 Member
in Motivation and Support
I don't know if anyone can relate but I feel like expressing my feelings, I have done an ok job so far during my 6 months now on MFP and lost 23lbs, i know its not the best loss for 6 months but I said from the start I was going to be realistic and to be slow and steady.

I have spent the day with my younger, blonder, skinnier, taller, prettier, more stylish sister today for a day of shopping. I am feeling bummed out right now. She is only 3 years younger than me and her life isn't too dissimilar from mine and probably those are the reasons we get along as well as we do. However I feel like I'm 15 years older and I know I am about 30lbs heavier and it all just makes me feel like a massive frump.

I feel like I have completely lost myself more and more as I gained more and more weight over the years, It hasn't always been this way, I was the skinnier and more confident sister about 5-10 years ago, I was always a very skinny child and she was a very chubby child. I am so proud of my sister for working hard and losing her 50lb+ of excess weight however my weight has gone in the opposite direction. She was busy buying great clothes all day and styling outfits and talking about how she had her hair done yesterday and I just felt totally rotten about myself as I ignored all the clothes I know I am too large or too self conscious to wear and instead spent my money buying household items from the bargain shops!

I must add that I am only 23 and have no kids or anything however I feel awful about myself - It has at least given my the motivation to work harder on my weight loss to try and feel like the old me.

Meh! Can anyone relate?

Replies

  • aklharris
    aklharris Posts: 6 Member
    Yeah i can! Im 24, have two kids though. I used to be skinny and pretty, met my OH and am now just over 200lbs!!! I dont feel like me hate shopping, never get hair done or anything, i think its because i feel i dont deserve to be treated. I mourn my 18 year old self.
    Its the motivation i dont have, im a stress eater and 2 kids, uni and job hunting = stress!

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