feel like i have lost myself under the layers of fat

cazziecoo
cazziecoo Posts: 29 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
I don't know if anyone can relate but I feel like expressing my feelings, I have done an ok job so far during my 6 months now on MFP and lost 23lbs, i know its not the best loss for 6 months but I said from the start I was going to be realistic and to be slow and steady.

I have spent the day with my younger, blonder, skinnier, taller, prettier, more stylish sister today for a day of shopping. I am feeling bummed out right now. She is only 3 years younger than me and her life isn't too dissimilar from mine and probably those are the reasons we get along as well as we do. However I feel like I'm 15 years older and I know I am about 30lbs heavier and it all just makes me feel like a massive frump.

I feel like I have completely lost myself more and more as I gained more and more weight over the years, It hasn't always been this way, I was the skinnier and more confident sister about 5-10 years ago, I was always a very skinny child and she was a very chubby child. I am so proud of my sister for working hard and losing her 50lb+ of excess weight however my weight has gone in the opposite direction. She was busy buying great clothes all day and styling outfits and talking about how she had her hair done yesterday and I just felt totally rotten about myself as I ignored all the clothes I know I am too large or too self conscious to wear and instead spent my money buying household items from the bargain shops!

I must add that I am only 23 and have no kids or anything however I feel awful about myself - It has at least given my the motivation to work harder on my weight loss to try and feel like the old me.

Meh! Can anyone relate?

Replies

  • Chrisparadise579
    Chrisparadise579 Posts: 411 Member
    Absolutely! I felt that way about my brother who for years was thinner, more muscular and "better looking" but as I lost the weight I stopped feeling that way. But it wasnt because I lost the weight really, it was because I realized that I am not him and never will be so I just wanted to be the best version of myself I could possibly be. Since then I am more confident in the best shape of my life and all around happier than ever. So you see its great that you are losing the weight, but you have to stop comparing yourself to sommeone who isnt you, because in the end no matter how similar you may be, she is not YOU, be proud of YOU and you will be much happier :)
  • galprincess
    galprincess Posts: 683 Member
    My sis is my twin and I was skinnier one when younger but after 3 children I gained weight im about 1 dress size bigger than her now but I know she has hang ups im 5ft 5 shes 5ft 10 so yup im smaller wouldn't say shes prettier but she is more confident but we will get there hugest hugs hun , use that emotion on hard days it pushes you on xxx
  • Cheekies_
    Cheekies_ Posts: 319 Member
    Absolutely! I felt that way about my brother who for years was thinner, more muscular and "better looking" but as I lost the weight I stopped feeling that way. But it wasnt because I lost the weight really, it was because I realized that I am not him and never will be so I just wanted to be the best version of myself I could possibly be. Since then I am more confident in the best shape of my life and all around happier than ever. So you see its great that you are losing the weight, but you have to stop comparing yourself to sommeone who isnt you, because in the end no matter how similar you may be, she is not YOU, be proud of YOU and you will be much happier :)

    ^^^^ Yes, yes, yes!

    Love you for YOU, Girly!
  • Calahonda1984
    Calahonda1984 Posts: 46
    I can definitely relate to this.

    My sister is a couple of years older and I always used to be the slimmer one. I'm now around the same weight as her even though she is taller, I hate the fact I compare myself to her all the time.

    She has had two children and I have had none, she has done so well with losing weight after giving birth and is now back down to her wedding weight! I just feel so frumpy next to her.

    I think the other thing is is that she has much bigger breasts than me, I have always been hung up about the size of mine.

    So, I think it's only natural to compare yourself to a sibling once in a while but it can become an unhealthy obsession! I'm working on it though, good to know I'm not the only one x

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