I think my mother is trying to stop me from losing weight

SingRunTing

I agree with everyone else that you don't have to eat it. It's your choice what you eat. If it just sits there not being eaten, she will stop buying so much of it.

Another option (the one we use with the goodies my MIL pushes on us when we visit) is to wrap up individual servings and freeze them. So its, "Thanks MIL for the chocolate cake. It was thoughtful of you!". Then we bring it home, slice it up, wrap the slices in saran wrap, and pop them into the freezer. The fact that you need to defrost it before you eat it means you can't just mindlessly munch. I will have some cake sometimes. But its when I have the calories for it and I plan for it by defrosting the cake.

RheneeB

You sound like my sister....always fussing at how every time she tries to lose weight, mom cooks her favorite meals and invites her over for dinner. My advice to my sister is always the same "just say no". Pretty simple...."sorry mom, I have plans tonight but how about you and dad coming over tomorrow night for some grilled salmon and fresh asparagus".

I live in a different state than my parents but recently went for a visit. Now according to my mom, she has stopped buying junk food and sweets because of my father's recent doctors' visit and being told he is borderline diabetic....however, I arrived at their house to find mom had gotten ice cream, 3 varieties of pound cakes and a huge blackberry pie to celebrate my 4 day visit. Now my mom knows that I have made changes to my eating habits (aka dieting) so my "sabotaging" alert button immediately began ringing in my ears. I quieted the alert by simply acknowledging that I had a choice...she wasn't going to force feed me this stuff....I had a choice. So when the pound cake and coffee got served for dessert, I opted out. When the ice cream got scooped and drizzled with Hershey's chocolate, I opted out....when the blackberry pie was sliced, I said "just a sliver" (ok...so I had a sliver of blackberry pie) but the point here is that you have choices...make them wisely!!!

JoRocka

Whenever I start watching what I'm eating my mother always ends up buying tons of junk food for me. Things like Cake, Doughnuts, Tons of chocolate etc. She says she buys them because I like them, but I find it suspicious that she does it whenever I want to start losing weight. When I tell her to stop, she tells me to stop being ridiculous, and that I don't need to lose weight

I know that I can refuse what she buys, but then I'd feel bad for not eating any of it because she went to the trouble to buy it for me.

In another thread you say you are 5' 10" and 150lbs. Why are you trying to lose weight?

Cause I'm not happy at this weight.

Im 5'10" 150# female. Are you unhappy withy the weight (which is slim for a female) or your body composition?

My thoughts exactly- i'm 5'8" and 160- and I think I look pretty dayum good.

I suspect you aren't happy with your body composition- do you work out? run? lift weights?

losing weight isn't always the answer- sometimes it's actually putting weight on i.e. building some muscle.

PS_ don't let your mom boss you around- you're a grown *kitten* man.
man up and move out.

Original_Sinner

For those insisting he should move out - maybe stop to consider it might be beyond him due to circumstances, finances, etc. Sadly, in this big bad world of ours, things go wrong in life and you need to rely on others for a while. Don't be so judgmental, unless you want people to look down at your whenever you require anyone's help.

Going back to the original question, you don't have to eat what people buy you - sorry, but that excuse about politeness/obligation/etc isn't going to wash. Either turn it down or as someone else has suggested, accept it and bin it. I appreciate that when something is placed in front of you it can be a challenge to your will power. Because it's supposed to be, nice stuff is always tempting. You just have to ask yourself what do you want more, to lose weight or to eat the sickly, nice things.

I completely understand about wanting to losing weight, even when you're at a weight others think you should be happy with. I've gotten as low as 9:9 lbs and felt like I'm too heavy, when you know - you just know. You just have to go steady with weight loss and you'll know when you've reached the right number. I'm going to avoid patronising you about eating disorders and credit you with enough intelligence to know what will be a good, healthy weight for you to be going off the mirror, scales and measurements. All the best.

if that's the case and he's dependent upon her good graces for help,

then grow some gratefulness back and quit whining.

She's a MOM for crying out loud, she isn't trying to hurt him. Ignore the food, or move out.

ksy1969

Whenever I start watching what I'm eating my mother always ends up buying tons of junk food for me. Things like Cake, Doughnuts, Tons of chocolate etc. She says she buys them because I like them, but I find it suspicious that she does it whenever I want to start losing weight. When I tell her to stop, she tells me to stop being ridiculous, and that I don't need to lose weight

I know that I can refuse what she buys, but then I'd feel bad for not eating any of it because she went to the trouble to buy it for me.

In another thread you say you are 5' 10" and 150lbs. Why are you trying to lose weight?

Cause I'm not happy at this weight.

OMG, then I know why she is doing what she is doing. My dad is 5' 8" and he got down to 150 at one point before the doctor said that was to much. He was way to skinny. At 5' 10", my height, nope, not gonna happen :noway:

Michelle_Padgett13

So you're a 5'10" male who weighs 150. According to your profile, you're trying to lose 15 pounds, which would put you at 135 pounds, with a BMI of about 19. This is technically still in the healthy range for your height, but it's at the low end of the spectrum.

My thoughts on this scenario:

1. If I was your mother, I would worry about you trying to lose weight. I'm not sure if I would buy you junk food, but I can understand your mother's desire to entice you to eat more.

2. Are you sure you have a healthy idea of what you should look like? At 150 you are already at a healthy weight. Is it possible you need to talk to a professional about your body image?

3. If you really think you are "skinny fat," then perhaps a program of weight lifting is what you need. Eat lots of good food and lift heavy weights. Build muscle.

4. In my opinion, your calorie goal is too low for a man your height.

My thoughts. Take them or leave them. :flowerforyou:

SonicDeathMonkey80

I'm 5' 10" and weigh 155. You gotta eat, homey. Lift, run, whatever, and eat more.

keitilee

My mom does the same thing! So much that I opted not to tell her I'm working out and such.
But I was just complaining about this yesterday, that whenever I tell my mom I'm trying to lose weight, she makes brownies
or cookies or anything fat, sweet, and triggering. And my uncle told me, "You have to have a stronger will than that," which actually
encouraged me!

Just remember, anytime she buys this stuff...what's more important? Eating junk, or working toward your goal. She can't force you to eat them, so that's the good thing, only you can make yourself choose sweets over health.
Like my uncle said, just have a stronger will, if you want to lose weight, make it happen!

keitilee

Agreed. I'm a recovered bulimic and this kind of hurts to read...people suffer in different ways, maybe not something you agree with but doesn't mean it's not hard on the other person or makes them "less intelligent" than people who don't suffer that way.

Bj0223

Does your mom buy all your food? Are you complaining because she only buys junk? You have someone grocery shopping for you!! Be thankful!!

Go thank and hug your mother. Learn to be grateful and don't eat what you don't want to.

lorib642

I know it is tempting and you don't want to offend her but if you don't want to eat it, don't. Eat something else instead. There is a carrot cake in my refrigerator that is calling me but I am ignoring it. I am not saying it is easy, it isn't. I don't know that you should be dieting but if you want to avoid junkfood you can.

cristacoyote

I think everyone here is forgetting how hard temptation is when you favorite snacks are in the house. My boyfriend used to do the same thing, every time I would lose a few pounds he thought it would be a good idea to buy chocolate and nachos (not that he eats them). Whether you are 6 or 66, temptation is hard. People around us have a difficult time dealing with change and for different reasons. Sometimes they are insecure, sometimes jealous, etc. Maybe having a heart to heart with your mom and letting her know that this is very important to you and you would appreciate her support would work. I told my boyfriend if I came home to one more time to pizza and chips waiting for me he was moving out, it seemed to work.

tabicatinthehat

25 years old why not move out and stop depending on your mom to buy you anything? Isn't it about time to grow up and start standing on your own as adult??? Also accept the personal responsibility on what you choose to eat.

Wow, Judgy McJudgeson.

La5Vega5Girl

my mother does the same thing to me, and I am 43 years old and do not live with her. she buys things that we do not eat (cookies, cakes, breads, etc.) even though she knows that we eat gluten-free and healthy in our home. I would fight her but then decided to just throw everything out after she leaves. it does no good to argue. from where I've been and what I've seen, it does nothing but upset YOU.