No motivation after knee surgery... help :(

TaLisa08

I'll start by getting right to the point. I'm the most overweight I've ever been in my life. I'm also the most depressed. Prior to where I am now I was doing crossfit 2-3x a week and walking on my treadmill 1-2x a week. I have terrible eating habits and I think I'm addicted to food. I chronically overeat and eat WAY too much sugar, yet I can't stop. In May I injured my knee, what I now know was a torn ACL. I finally had surgery August 21st and am on my 4th week of physical therapy and recovery. For those of your who aren't familiar with ACL reconstruction surgery timelines they are lengthy. Full recovery is around 9mos to 1year. At 12 weeks I might be allowed to run and at 16 weeks I might be allowed to do other physical activities. Anyways, since surgery I have zero motivation to feed my body right and I haven't done anything physical because I feel like #1. I can't because my leg hurts and #2. I shouldn't and #3 what's the point? I'm 5'5'' and when I graduated college two years ago I weighed 150lbs I now weigh 165-170. I felt huge at 150 and now I feel so huge I want to wear nothing but sweat pants. My sex life is out the door with my long time boyfriend. I just feel so stuck. I don't know what to do to get the motivation to feed myself right. In the past I have done many diets... Paleo a lot, advocare 24 day challenge.. Etc you name it. I used to consistently log my food on myfitnesspal but haven't in ages. I always make it through the first 10ish days of a diet and then blow it BIG TIME on something like a burger and fries or ice cream. And I always feel guilty yet I can never get the thoughts of those foods out of my head. Anyways sorry this turned into kind of a ran but I need help big time. I need advice on what I can do physically right now to work out or feel physical and how I can get motivated or the help to feed myself correctly. Any advice really is truly appreciated.