Embarrassed to be seen running!

euronorris

This is why I decided to try out a local, female only (beginners) running club last night. I'm glad I did because I didn't feel at all self conscious with the other ladies there, and there was a real mix of ladies in the group too. Some very slim, some overweight, and one who was obese (who, incidentally, has more stamina than I!). Everyone was just very supportive of one another.

Have you checked your local area for groups like that, to help you get started and build your confidence?

jpjd123

Why embarrassed - why care what other people (whom you might not even know) think????? They may not actually think anything!

We tend to put too much weight on the possible thoughts and views of other people!

dianesheart88

I used to feel the way you do. I started running in the gym on the treadmill. I don't run the whole time.. I can't yet due to how high my heart rate goes, so I run for a few minutes then walk for a few. Here's what I know... I've only been going to the gym for about 2 months and usually what I think isn't even close to what others are thinking. Two other ladies have approached me and commented on how hard I am working out.
Most people will look at you and wish they could get themselves to where you are. Feel PROUD about running and be yourself! Good luck!

AlexRiddy

I have never met a mean runner that feels like commenting in a negative way. I would not worry ! mostly i find I get encouragement !!

sunglasses_and_ocean_waves

Chances are, those runners think what you're doing is awesome! When I first started running, I had an 80 year old man blaze past me on the trail. At first I was kinda butthurt, but he turned around and gave me a thumbs up and I felt really encouraged to keep going. Just keep on keeping on!! And good luck with your running, it's the best thing I've ever done for myself!!! :flowerforyou:

This. Absolutely.

I seriously have nothing but respect when I see a newbie out there. Anyone who runs knows it's friggen hard to start out (heck the first 10 minutes are hard for me every time I run).

Most of running is in your head anyway. It's just as important to derail the negative thoughts as it is to condition the legs. So getting past the embarrassment is all part of training. You got this

TriShamelessly

Many of us started out in the same boat you did. I started out with the c25k program last March. I will be attempting my first marathon in November. My most common thought when I see larger folks out running is now: "Good for you! Keep at it!" and a quick thumbs up as I pass. So get out there and run!

VanillaGorillaUK

I had this too, it's completely normal, so don't feel like it's just you.

One thing I kept telling myself that got me through it was, no matter what I think or how I feel, I will get it done. I can feel embarrassed, weak, out of place - but it will be completed anyway.

tjsoccermom

I was there when I first started, too. I was running on an indoor track at my Y that goes above our pool, with windows around part of it, so there's the other runners AND the swimmers that see you. I could see my reflection, too. I struggled with that but I also knew that if I didn't do it, I was hurting myself. So, I decided I didn't care. Funny thing is, I know some of the lifeguards and they have commented to my daughter about my weight loss as they have seen me running my circles the past 21 months. It's all worth it in the end. Before you know it, you'll be slim and fit and encouraging other runners. I find that running takes the weight off the quickest for me, so when I need to jump start myself again, I run again (I also love to bike). Best advice is just do it. Most people really aren't paying attention, those that are really just do think that you're doing a great job, and those that have other thoughts aren't worth even a thought, they're just insecure jerks themselves. Best of luck, you've got this!!

Maestairs

Those that care are glad to see you run .Who cares about the rest ?

20yearsyounger

It's all internal. They may not say it but they are impressed with you taking up the challenge!

fleetzz

Don't worry about it. Real runners will be supportive and any that give negative comments are not worth paying attention to.

I suggest that you go to a 5K or 1/2 marathon race--you will see people of all shapes and sizes running. Not surprisingly, most of the runners at the head of the pack are slender (helps them to be wicked fast!), but there are people of all sizes running all paces.

Read ThickMcRunFast's guide to starting running, which is now a sticky at the top of the fitness forum. I wish I read it when I started. She has great advice.

ShannonMpls

PLEASE go do a search on "fatty running on the Westview track". I re-read it EVERY time I go work out in public.

Am I the only person who finds this incredibly gross? From the patronizing tone, to the ridiculous suggestion that the runner must be paying off a "debt." Maybe the other runner is avoiding the author's gaze because he's a damn creeper who is judging his or her every move? I don't see how this is supposed to make a person feel better about exercising in public. Instead, it seems to confirm people's worst fears: other people are judging.



To the OP:
I struggled with this in the gym at first, walking in weighing more than 300 pounds wearing big tshirts and pajama pants. I could have been ashamed or felt self-conscious. Instead, I simply decided to not give a *kitten*. I didn't care if people were judging or staring or mocking. I had a job to do, and I was there to do it.

Turns out no one stared or mocked, and if they judged - I still don't give a *kitten*. My workouts have exactly nothing to do with them. There were certainly times other gymgoers commented to me - but it was more of a "wow, I see you here all the time and your transformation is stunning" - nothing like the "dear fatty" letter above.

And just so you know, now that I no longer weigh 300 pounds and I am one of those fit runners out there, I smile at runners I pass and don't think a thing about whether they're unfit or overweight or anything like that. The way I see it, we're all in it together.

JupeJones

Imagine there was someone--let's call him Karl--who was an illiterate adult. At some point he got sick and tired about how his inability to read and write was holding him back, and he decided to do something about it.

So now he goes to the public library and studies. Mostly children's books for now, with plenty of pictures. It's pretty obvious to anyone seeing him there what he's doing and why.

Now imagine that you walk into the library to pick up a book for yourself to read. Answer these three questions:

1.) Would you even notice Karl in the first place? (Probably not.)

2.) If you did notice him, would you think to yourself "Ha, ha! What an idiot! I am so superior to this loser!" Or would you think "How awesome that he's doing this for himself!" (I would hope the latter!)

3.) In any case, should Karl give a rat's red *kitten* what you or anyone else thinks about what he's doing, positive or negative? Should any of it discourage him or sway him from his path to self-improvement? (Certainly not!)

Same thing with your running. Most people won't even notice you or care that you're running. Of the few who do, most will be supportive and think you're going a great thing. A few jerks won't, but that's life. In the end, "what other people think", doesn't matter one bit. You're doing this for you, and you're correct to be doing it.

The only way to get ahead in life--whether it's health, career, music/art/dance, or love--is to gleefully risk looking like a complete schmuck. :-)

SonicDeathMonkey80

Looks like I'm wearing a tutu for part of a marathon next month. Don't wanna hear it

msf74

“You wouldn't worry so much about what others think of you if you realized how seldom they do.” ~ Eleanor Roosevelt

OP, I hate to break this to you but...you're probably just not that important to the vast majority of people who are too busy dealing with their own stuff internally to notice what you are doing.

Now run.

Run like the wind!

ShannonMpls

The only way to get ahead in life--whether it's health, career, music/art/dance, or love--is to gleefully risk looking like a complete schmuck. :-)

Therealobi1

If you want to do it just get yourself a good sports bra and put your music on, and go for your run no one cares at all. You can do it. x

sjebert

Don't worry about it, I don't necessarily run but I am out walking 3 - 5 miles every day and I see a lot of the same people out walking and running, yeah I am out of shape, but I am out there trying and just last night one of them came running by me and gave me a high 5 and said that he was proud of my dedication to be out here every day and doing something, I don't even know the guy but I can't tell you how good that made me feel. You will be surprised at the support some of these people will give you if they see you out there on a consistent basis working as hard as you can.

BrianSharpe

PLEASE go do a search on "fatty running on the Westview track". I re-read it EVERY time I go work out in public.

I can't speak for non-runners but when I see someone starting out it reminds me that:

a) that was me 7 years ago (everyone starts somewhere)
b) you're making positive changes in your life

When the colder weather hit and I started going out in my running tights (that must have been a sight!) I very quickly realized that runners have become such a part of the urban landscape that we may as well be invisible.

Keep it up!

mkdm291

I didn't read all the responses, so I apologize if this was already stated. When I run, I am in my own little selfish world trying to get fit and listening to my music. It's my happy time. I don't think I would think twice about anyone who runs past me.
However, that being said... and a bit contradictory of what I just said .... If I did notice an overweight person running, I would think "Good for them. They're working hard!" -- Because I was at one point that overweight runner.
Best of luck and enjoy. Exercise should be fun!