Honest Opinions Please

nicola8989

I've just added a photo to my profile for a reality check (sorry I can't figure out how to add it here). The photo is my starting weight- I've since lost 9lbs

Now I KNOW I'm overweight of course - but do I look obese? I'm not talking about the BMI numbers etc but just how I look.

blakedebo

Why does it matter if people think you look obese or not? just curious

LoraF83

How we think you look isn't important. How you *feel* is. Do you feel like you need to lose weight? Do you feel like you could improve your health and fitness?

Subjective opinions about your body aren't going to help you. Setting personal goals and striving to meet them will. Do that for yourself and no one else.

Congrats on your success so far!

nicola8989

I just personally feel like the numbers on the scale and what I see don't quite add up??

Hornsby

I'm not sure why you would want to know that. If you are asking, you probably know the answer already. The good thing about that is that you can end all those thoughts and get yourself to where you want to be if you stick to a plan.

Liftng4Lis

It doesn't matter what other people think, its what you think that's important. Ask yourself why you are here and what you're willing to do about it. Then just do it!

nilbogger

I just personally feel like the numbers on the scale and what I see don't quite add up??

So do you think you look obese but your BMI does not indicate that? Or the other way around?

Sued0nim

I think you know the answer too

But well done so far, and good luck with the next 60-odd pounds

Fedup23

Yes. I am too.. but you are in the right place to change it.

Salvi30

Just keep working hard and keep your goals, because 6 to 12 months from now you will be happy you did.

LivingtheLeanDream

keep up the great work and keep taking pics every month of yourself and you'll see your body diminishing before your eyes
You don't need us to tell you how you look, you know yourself from the size of clothes you wear now etc and how you feel when you look in the mirror. Each of us have a size we want to be. Aim for that, keep going and you will love seeing your new shape emerging.

shexy16

That's kind of a dangerous question to ask people! It's like if I asked my man "hey, do these jeans make me look fat?" He knows to say "NO" whether or not the jeans make me look fat or not. He'd be an idiot to say "yes, you look like a porker".

I'm not saying you look obese or not, what I am saying is that everyone on this planet has a different idea of what the perfect body looks like, what's too big and what's not, what's too skinny and what's not, regardless of what the "official" scientific doctor weight charts and BMI charts and all that looks like. Everyone carries their weight differently, and what might look fine to me might look really too big to someone else.

maidentl

I just personally feel like the numbers on the scale and what I see don't quite add up??

Obese isn't a personal judgment, it's a medical term that indicates that your BMI is above a certain number. That's it. It doesn't matter if you "look" obese, you either are or you aren't.

ETA: I should clarify - above that number with an excess of body fat. Obviously, some very lean people have high BMIs due to muscle mass.

Discoqueen77

Perspective is everything. I've been 128lbs for a decade. 140 for another decade. 180 for another. Now I am in the 'hitherland' and I've noticed that after I have been a larger size for some time, my body and mind sort of 'acclimate' to the larger size. It was only when I saw a photo of myself compared to others and other things did I realize my true size. We are here to get healthy. We can take all kinds of good 'selfies' - but we are here for a reason.

independant2406

I think I understand what your getting at. (You look like an average adult woman to me by the way...not obese.)

I'm about your age and we have a similar build. Some days I look at the scale and then at the mirror and can't imagine they're the same person. I've had several people express shock when I tell them my actual weight (because apparently I carry it well or maybe I hide it with clothes? Either way people don't seem to think I look as heavy as I actually am (and I'm built like you).

Most days I look in the mirror and I feel HUGE and I hate what I see. Those days I feel like the scale is right. I feel ugly. I make myself miserable wishing for a body like my friends had in high school. What I see is not the reality of what other people see though. And often what I wish for is not even realistic for my body build.

We all may have our days when we feel awkward or uncomfortable in our bodies, but the key to developing positive body image is to recognize and respect our natural shape and learn to overpower those negative thoughts and feelings with positive, affirming, and accepting ones.

Applaud yourself for the progress you've made so far (which is fantastic by the way!). Don't go crazy thinking about your looks/criticizing yourself or worrying about what other people think. It'll only hold you back.

nicola8989

thanks guys - I guess you're right - I think sometimes I maybe have a skewed idea of how I look and what obese looks like?

LoraF83

I just personally feel like the numbers on the scale and what I see don't quite add up??

Sounds like you're having some body image issues. That combined with your post about self-loathing yesterday is going to make me suggest that you find a support group or professional to talk to. I think you're dealing with some emotional issues about your weight and you need some help with that.

nicola8989

Thank you. I did have an eating disorder in the past - I think I will look for a professional to help me on this journey.

nicola8989

I think I understand what your getting at. (You look like an average adult woman to me by the way...not obese.)

I'm about your age and we have a similar build. Some days I look at the scale and then at the mirror and can't imagine they're the same person. I've had several people express shock when I tell them my actual weight (because apparently I carry it well or maybe I hide it with clothes? Either way people don't seem to think I look as heavy as I actually am (and I'm built like you).

Most days I look in the mirror and I feel HUGE and I hate what I see. Those days I feel like the scale is right. I feel ugly. I make myself miserable wishing for a body like my friends had in high school. What I see is not the reality of what other people see though. And often what I wish for is not even realistic for my body build.

We all may have our days when we feel awkward or uncomfortable in our bodies, but the key to developing positive body image is to recognize and respect our natural shape and learn to overpower those negative thoughts and feelings with positive, affirming, and accepting ones.

Applaud yourself for the progress you've made so far (which is fantastic by the way!). Don't go crazy thinking about your looks/criticizing yourself or worrying about what other people think. It'll only hold you back.

you've just summed up exactly how I feel x

Kalikel

I didn't have to look at the pic to know if you looked obese or not. All the responses of people not saying No made it obvious that you were.

If you're fat, you can't hide it from the world. People see it. They know it. They may say you aren't, but they of course know you are.

When you're thin, you won't be able to hide that, either. Everyone will see that, too.

But honestly, you should be doing this to please yourself. Consider seeing a therapist who specializes in eating disorders. They can help you work through a lot of these emotions you have that are tied into food and your weight.

vismal

thanks guys - I guess you're right - I think sometimes I maybe have a skewed idea of how I look and what obese looks like?

Obese doesn't look like anything. It's a medical definition. Different people who are both obese could look very similar, or very different. If your BMI is 30 or higher you are by definition obese. You can even be obese with low levels of body fat. I am overweight according to BMI but most my most recent body fat analysis puts me at around 12%. It's somewhat arbitrary because a BMI of 29.9 is not obese but will yield a very similar outward appearance of a BMI of 30 which is obese.

All in all it really doesn't matter. Obesity, or BMI in general is meant to show trends over a population. It doesn't mean that if you personally reduce your BMI from 30 to 29.9 that all of a sudden your risk factors for diseases are greatly reduced. You should know if you are a healthy weight, you should know if your weight is currently, or is likely to in the future impact your health and make you prone to disease. If you do not know, I would encourage you to talk to your doctor about it. They will be able to tell if your weight is currently a health problem or likely to become one. Don't focus so much on what obese looks like because at the end of the day, this guy is obese:

SLLRunner

I just personally feel like the numbers on the scale and what I see don't quite add up??

Sounds like you're having some body image issues. That combined with your post about self-loathing yesterday is going to make me suggest that you find a support group or professional to talk to. I think you're dealing with some emotional issues about your weight and you need some help with that.

This exactly.

SLLRunner

Thank you. I did have an eating disorder in the past - I think I will look for a professional to help me on this journey.

From a girl who dealt with an eating disorder, I say, "You Go!" Get the help you need and love your body no matter what size you are. In my opinion, self love is one of the most important tools to losing weight and keeping it off.

Tbaby1514

Obese is a medical term based on BMI. If you're asking if you look big, yes you do. I'm not trying to sound like a ****, but I'm not going to write an entire essay beating around the bush.

earth_echo

comment deleted. wrong thread. my bad.

shifterbrainz

Obese is a medical term based on BMI. If you're asking if you look big, yes you do. I'm not trying to sound like a ****, but I'm not going to write an entire essay beating around the bush.

That was helpful. No need to try.

nicola8989

Thank you everyone - I think I'll take the pic down now but I'll take it all on board x

wellthenwhat

http://www.mybodygallery.com/

This is a good place to see what other people of varying heights and weights look like. Sometimes it's easier to see in other people.

newhealthykim

Any other girls or bi/gay guys really happy with the eye candy vismal put up? I'm not one to normally swoon over muscles, but dang...