Does anyone feel like their goals are a million miles away?

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Replies

  • stacyjh1979
    stacyjh1979 Posts: 188 Member
    I work in 10 pound increments. For example, my current weight is 192, so my next goal is to get into the 180s. Next goal after that is the 170s, and so on. i started at 203, so my first goal was to get to ONEderland. Set small goals that will help you meet your long term goal.

    I started at 203 also and I was thrilled to get into the 190's then the 180's and now working toward 170's. For me ten pounds at a time makes me feel like I'm getting somewhere rather than focusing on what I have to lose in total.
  • yeah, you aren't alone...
  • newhealthykim
    newhealthykim Posts: 192 Member
    Does anyone else feel like their goals are a million miles away?

    My first goal is to lose 14lbs by mid November. It sounds so achievable but previous failures make me feel like its year away and I am afraid of failing again.

    I am only one day in and this worry is hanging over me.

    Anyone else feel the same? Anyone overcome this feeling and won? My diet perspective is seriously warped after years of the same cycles.

    Do I feel like my goal of losing 102 lbs is a million miles away? Yes. And that goal of running a half marathon next December? Yes (that one I'm actually happy is a million miles away :P ). My other short term goals? No, those are just around the corner.

    I broke down my goals into smaller goals. I now have 5 weight loss goals and 5 fitness goals. None of those goals have time limitations on them except for the half marathon (it is a specific one held annually that means a lot to me). I don't like putting a timer on myself. I certainly didn't put a timer on myself when gaining all this weight. If I missed a weight loss goal on some timer I put on myself, I would feel very discouraged. Without that timer, I know I'm going to hit it. It's only a matter of when.

    I've done the lose weight-gain weight cycle about 3 times now. I'm done. No more yo-yo diet for me. This plan will work. I've seen it work. I also know I'm not going to fail. I had that revelation this weekend, and it was so tremendous for me, I literally cried for a good hour. I'm never going to be at this weight again. I won't let myself. I believe in myself, because I want it that bad, and it's all about choices. The weight gain isn't something that just happens. It's a choice. As much as I've been dodging that realization, it's true. I chose to not watch what I was eating or exercise, and I gained weight. Now I'm chosing to eat selectively and exercise for life. I'm not coming back here ever again.
  • likitisplit
    likitisplit Posts: 9,420 Member
    That's 2 pounds a week and extremely aggressive. From experience, I'd focus on the things you can control: logging every bite that goes into your mouth and getting at least 30 minutes of vigorous activity five days a week.

    The weight will come of in it's own time - you'll have days up and down. But, if you DO everything right, you'll lose the weight.

    And yes, when I started out, I was obsessive at the math. When could I reach my goal weight? What if I did this? What if I did that?

    The thing is that the first 10% of your body weight is a HUGE change. Halfway there is a HUGE change. Goal is kind of meh, and you'll probably have new, improved goals by then anyway. So focus on getting the most out of where you are right now.
  • AglaeaC
    AglaeaC Posts: 1,974 Member
    Does anyone else feel like their goals are a million miles away?

    My first goal is to lose 14lbs by mid November. It sounds so achievable but previous failures make me feel like its year away and I am afraid of failing again.

    I am only one day in and this worry is hanging over me.

    Anyone else feel the same? Anyone overcome this feeling and won? My diet perspective is seriously warped after years of the same cycles.
    I stopped plotting my weight into the calendar like appointments. It created nothing but stress to me, expectations that I was unable to meet, and I was miserable. It's good to have a realistic idea of how quickly/slowly it is possible to lose weight, but what I prefer now is to view the whole lifestyle change and realise that my weight is only an indirect effect of it; I don't put too much focus on what the scale tells me now.

    As for being able to remain patient and committed, I think it is beneficial to look both backwards and forwards. If you only ever remind yourself of what is still left undone, you will never be proud and happy of already achieved things. Celebrate also non-scale victores (NSV). And go to the source of why you have excess weight currently, aim to prevent anything that could cause your weight to increase in the future (= permanent lifestyle change).

    Just remember the perspective and pat yourself on the back.
  • TheSatinPumpkin
    TheSatinPumpkin Posts: 948 Member
    Just over 13 months ago when i started my WOE and joined this forum i recall setting up my ticker and seeing those daunting 200lb+ digits to reach my "goal".

    Just took it one day and lb at a time and before i knew it... its now.
  • Kalikel
    Kalikel Posts: 9,603 Member
    Yes and no. Yes, I realize that the end goal is going to take forever to reach. There's nothing to be done about it, so I just don't think about that. :)

    Everything I do is to reach that end goal, but I concentrate on the now. What do I have to do today to make this happen?

    Little things come up that make me happy, so I think more about those. "Ooh, I can't wait until..." things. I can't wait until I wear that pair of shorts I kept all these years. I can't wait to change the 2 in 200 to a 1. I can't wait until I hit these big mile markers (e.g. 175, 150.) Every ten pound marker, every new size I fit into...it all becomes part of the fun and the focus.

    Exercise. What can I add.? How does it feel? Can I do something I couldn't do when I was 250 pounds of fat? Do I like it? How can I make my body better? Should I go back to the weight machines? Should I try running? It all adds variety and is good for my body. :)

    Right now, I still am not sure what my end weight will even be. Still too fat to carve that number in stone. But at 181.8 (for three damn days straight!), I'm really excited about hitting 180. And the big 175 is coming up, so I'm jazzed about that. I'm even looking forward to having 150 as my next mile marker, lol. And getting into size 14. It's about to happen.

    I have added new exercise like planking. I do crunches and six inches every day and feel my abdomen being stronger, less of a drain on my back. I pull heavy weight through the water. I signed up at a gym again (God help me.) As the weather cools off, I'll get out and walk more. :) I feel good. I'm proud of me.

    I gross out at myself every day. So much fat. And the loose skin is really bugging me (it cannot be fixed! Argh!) I think about how much I've lost and how fat I still am. Occasionally, I think about how very much harder it will be to lose the second half of my weight than it was to lose the first half. But I know I'm a work in progress and that it will happen...and I go back to making it happen.

    At the weight I am now, every ten pounds shows marked improvement. That, in itself, is a huge accomplishment. I used to go 20 or 30 pounds and say, "I just don't see much difference..." Because there was so much fat! It didn't MAKE much difference. But NOW! Now it does. I did that. I got to the point where it really shows. So, yay! That's much more fun to focus on than, "OMG, I'm so fat."

    And I will get to the point where I'm thin. I'll say, "I'm as good as I can be. I did it." I know I can get there,because I got here. So, the long term goal...I'm working on it every day.

    Don't know if any of that helps.
  • MeanderingMammal
    MeanderingMammal Posts: 7,866 Member
    Anyone else feel the same? Anyone overcome this feeling and won? My diet perspective is seriously warped after years of the same cycles.

    I started with wanting to lose about 20 lbs, and was doing that using diet and exercise. Watching what I was eating, and starting to increase my phys. At the time that was running as it fitted neatly into my life at the time, in a way that other options didn't.

    20lbs seemed like a lot, but it really was a question of one day at a time and tracking the progress. For me it became more important to start thinking about my running performance as it was more tangible and I could see both near term goals and longer term. I'd found the weight loss goal not all that motivating and a bit arbitrary. I used a Couch to 5K plan to get running, so over that 9 weeks (12 in practice) there were lots of smaller goals; run for 5 minutes, run for 12 minutes, run for 20 minutes until I could do 30 minutes continuously. I then used an improver plan for a bit and then set my objectives a little higher, 10km distance and then 10km within an hour.

    Now I'm nearing the end of a half marathon plan and it's been the same. Keep stretching, keep pushing the boundaries.

    Break it all up into easily achievable chunks, to make it more manageable, and try to find something meaningful to you. Also time bound it, so that you can see when the steps are working.

    Equally, be prepared for the unexpected that will disrupt your progress. Don't let it derail you. I mentioned taking 12 weeks to complete a 9 week plan. A couple of times I had stuff that just got in the way of running, mainly work related, so I had to step back once and repeat a week, and also missed a week. In the last month I've not been too well and my training mileage has halved, so I've reset my expectations of the race I have coming up.
  • srdeaver
    srdeaver Posts: 38 Member
    Yes, I do! It comes off so slow.
  • StaciMarie1974
    StaciMarie1974 Posts: 4,138 Member
    Many of us have the on-again, off-again relationship with weight loss. My suggestion: don't try to do what has failed for you in the past.

    Set different goals. Either smaller goals (5 pound increments) or for the first 2-4 weeks don't focus on weight at all. Focus on logging daily & being consistent. Or focus on getting X fruits and Y veggies per day. Or 8 cups of water. Or a certain # of steps per day, exercise minutes per week. Set goals for fitness/nutrition/accountability to start with to get the ball rolling.
  • nicsflyingcircus
    nicsflyingcircus Posts: 2,848 Member
    When I started, my goal seemed pretty daunting. And it did take a while. I did what others said, though. I broke it up into smaller goals, and I knew if I didn't start, by that time the following year I would probably be heavier and wishing I had started.

    With 220lbs to lose, even a very optimistic outlook says it will take 110 weeks, or over two years. So I set smaller goals for myself and it's working for me. If anything, the "plan" I am following seems easier than it did earlier on. I am used to it now, got some good habits set and just trucking along :)
  • brightsideofpink
    brightsideofpink Posts: 1,018 Member
    For me its all about choices.

    Being 1000 miles away is far. I can't argue that.
    But it is better than being 1001 miles away.
    And even better than that? Being 999 miles away. Or 990. Or 950...

    There are so many motivational quotes like this that I like.

    A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.
    I may not be there yet, but I'm closer than I was yesterday.
    Do something today that your future self will thank you for.

    The distance is there. I can choose to accept it, increase it, or decrease it. And remind myself that every day the distance gets smaller.
  • Lizzy622
    Lizzy622 Posts: 3,705 Member
    Read today's blog from Coach Stevo.
  • bumblebreezy91
    bumblebreezy91 Posts: 520 Member
    I get so stoked about reaching my goal and then I'm hit with the realization that it's going to be months before I see my end results and that is very discouraging. I've been trying to make it a day to day thing and that helps. All I can focus on is today. I broke down my goals into smaller ones, so my first goal is just to keep fighting to get under 200 (about ten pounds or less away). Today I focused on increasing the time I spent on the treadmill. One day at a time.
  • Yup. Even though I'm an advocate of being patient. Even though I shoot for small goals, I still get overwhelmed at times. Just push through and don't give up.
  • emmabanks87
    emmabanks87 Posts: 86 Member
    YES!!!!!! I get annoyed sometimes as im running on the treadmill and working so freaking hard but I feel so fat!! :( I try to tell myself it wont always be like that
  • Ruzuki
    Ruzuki Posts: 136 Member
    I need to lose like 130+ pounds, it feels like its going to take forever...
    But I have a habit of sticking to something if I really put my mind to it, so I'm going to finally stop making excuses and just watch calories and exercise more. And this morning when I stepped on the scale and realized I was 10 lbs lighter than when I started this a month ago, it was a really good feeling.
  • NK1112
    NK1112 Posts: 781 Member
    Does anyone else feel like their goals are a million miles away?

    My first goal is to lose 14lbs by mid November. It sounds so achievable but previous failures make me feel like its year away and I am afraid of failing again.

    I am only one day in and this worry is hanging over me.

    Anyone else feel the same? Anyone overcome this feeling and won? My diet perspective is seriously warped after years of the same cycles.

    Yep ... I can relate to that feeling. But it's not something I dwell on cause I don't want to put any more stress on myself than there is already. There are a lot of us on here who, I am certain, have lost and gained and done it again many times over. The trick to finally making some headway is to figure out what works and what doesn't for you .... and certainly logging into your journal for food and exercise (if you do any) is a good thing to do. You can print off, or save to your computer, reports from your food journal that can help you analize what you were eating and doing in the weeks you had good results and in the weeks where you were unhappy about them ... and compare.

    Good luck.

    Oh, yes .. my own journey has been slow but I have been successfull in getting off about 30 pounds and keeping them off ... and it's been a slow ride for me. Lots of weeks on a maintenance like level before the weight starts to drop off again because of all the yo-yo dieting I have done that upset my metabolism and hormones. But I have every intention to keep at it for as long as it takes to get to where I want to be.
  • Yes. I think we all do, sometimes. You are not alone. I find it easier to focus on how good I feel when I eat properly, than to focus on my desired end result. Last October when I started going to a gym, I could barely walk (osteoarthritis in both hips), and the medical system was failing me. I signed up at a gym, got a personal trainer, learned what to eat and WHY, and found foods I liked that were in the "healthy" category. I learned exercises that help me with mobility. Bit by bit, things have improved. I can now walk almost properly again, and I've lost almost 20 lbs. That may not seem like a lot to lose over almost a year, but I feel 100% better than I did last year. And I did it by taking baby steps. My goal is to get back on a motorcycle (had to sell mine last year because I just couldn't ride any longer).

    I'm still a bit away from that goal, but I keep telling myself - "Maybe next year".

    Don't get discouraged. Just do the best you can, every day, and you'll get to your goal.
  • lorib642
    lorib642 Posts: 1,942 Member
    I don't know what is realistic for me. I am thinking i will celebrate milestones and not how long it took to get there
  • It feels like that for me all the time! I totally understand how you're feeling.
  • WarmDontBurn
    WarmDontBurn Posts: 1,253 Member
    YES!! Almost 7 months in and I cannot lose 20lbs :(
  • Hello, yes, I do feel that way! But I have just began my 90 day challenge, so I am looking forward to some progress! Patience and motivation! :)
  • paulawatkins1974
    paulawatkins1974 Posts: 720 Member
    Felt exactly like this at the beginning (with 121 lbs to lose) Now, almost 7 months have passed, I'm happy with my progress, and it seems like just yesterday I started. Believe me it wil become a lifestyle to you and every lb lost will be a victory and before you know it you will be at goal. I knew I had about a year and a half or more to lose it all but the thing is, a year and a half is going to pass anyway, I can choose to stay the way I am because I'm impatient, or journey along and be amazing in a year and a half. You can do this!
  • cincysweetheart
    cincysweetheart Posts: 892 Member
    Yes... If I think about them. Personally, I try to be more process oriented. I know what kind of a life I want... So I eat and exercise accordingly. A successful week for me is one in which I ate healthy and worked out like I wanted to. It's not about a number on a scale or on the label of my jeans. It's not even about the number on the weights I lift. Focus on the process. On changing your life, instead of the weight you want to be. I saw this quote and it's kinda become my motto... "If you focus on results, you'll never change. If you focus on change, you'll get results."
  • willywonka
    willywonka Posts: 743 Member
    One day at a time, you will get there I promise!!!:flowerforyou:
  • silentKayak
    silentKayak Posts: 658 Member
    No. My goals are:

    - Log into MFP every day.
    - Log everything I eat, or a close approximation of it.
    - Based on what I'm eating, get enough exercise to keep me around 1500 net on an average day of the week
    - Lift enough heavy things to keep from losing too much muscle
    - See downward movement on the scale

    Goals: ACHIEVED today, and every other day for the last 10 weeks.

    Ultimate scale goal - not achieved yet, but I'm heading in the right direction and I have the map telling me how to get there.
  • shifterbrainz
    shifterbrainz Posts: 245 Member
    Yeah but thats probably because I made it my personal goal to be able to see my abs XD

    I could see my abdomen just fine, its my feet I was missing :P LOL

    My goal weight sure seemed like a million miles away until I did some number crunching. It's my understanding that if adding 1lb of body fat takes 3,500 unburned calories, wouldn't adding 300lbs take just over a MILLION unburned calories? :( 300lbs x 3,500 calories/lbs = 1,050,000 excess calories consumed.

    Is that even possible . . . 1,000,000 calories? Is that possible to do in, say 6 years? The math seems to show that 6 years x 365 days/year = 2, 190 days. Divide 1,000,000 calories by 2,190 days = 456.6 unburned calories per day.

    Holy cow, if that's correct, all it takes is to add the equivalent of a single Hostess Fruit Pie or (1) extra slice of a Pizza Hut Bacon-n-Cheese Stuffed Crust Meat Lover's pizza or (1) extra McD's Quarter Pounder to what you already eat every day.

    Well if you want to be a millionaire, there ya go :-/

    To me, the calorie numbers are just that, numbers. But seeing the food that equals those numbers adds a perspective I can do something with.

    Two things I learned: 1.) If it can be added, they can be subtracted and 2.) Given enough time, anything is possible. :)
  • When I first started losing weight I felt like an ant that had to swim across an ocean. I kept trying to set my goals too high and I could not achieve, I wanted to lose 200lbs in one year at the time I was 345lbs I joined MFP when I was 321 I think lol... Anyways that was an unreasonable goal I set myself up for failure. I overcame this with little goals like in 4 weeks I would lose 8 pounds and would check once a month sort of thing. If I failed I just reset my goals.
  • C5North
    C5North Posts: 50 Member
    I'd be a liar if I said I don't think about it but it doesn't really concern me. It took me 15 years to put all this fat on so it is going to take a few to get it off. And I'm not dieting. I have simply changed the way I look at food. I'll be doing this for the rest of my life. The weight will come off in due time.