Is love enough?

AtlantisLoss

So I'm back to Mfp after a year.

I gained back my weight plus extra and actually felt more comfortable and secure after putting the weight back on. Recently I've actually found a mutual love interest which has destroyed the illusion of my fat being like a security blanket.

Now (at the heaviest I've ever been), I want to lose weight in order to feel attractive and gain my confidence back. I know I am blessed that he accepts me at the weight I am BUT I don't feel I can love him wholeheartedly when I cannot love myself the same way.

Will this be motivation enough to get me though this weight loss journey this time around?

sensitivefool

You should consider your attitude. It isn't a weight loss journey. This is about living a healthy and active life. Love grows over time. It should have nothing to do with your weight. Even in your own mind.

mzbek24

I think if he accepts you as you are (Which is awesome! very happy for you!) over time that may or may not lead to becoming a little less motivated to make the changes you want for yourself...

I met my partner at my heaviest weight and I did manage to lose some for my health, but I did put it back on a couple of years later. Eventually yeah, it was easy to become complacent when you know someone loves you just the way you are. It was always something I wanted to do, but I just seemed to lack the drive. Also, as he was not losing weight or doing any physical activities, it was easy to rub off habits onto each other and I found I'd be just relaxing with him on weekends, eating what he eats, going out for dinner a lot and following what he does, as opposed to my goals. Unfortunately his metabolism is a lot higher so he stayed slim, and I did not lol :P This time I have managed to do it, and make lifestyle changes and yeah it has had some benefits for our relationship...definitely has spiced things up a bit, and I am feeling more comfortable and confident with my body.

That said, everyone is different. I think you'd benefit by having a think about your goals, what you really want. Write them down if you want to, make them exist in more than just your mind (Which can get distracted) and be able to be seen. The strength of and ability of your motivation being able to be sustained, depends if you can really justify it to yourself, are open with your partner and family etc about any lifestyle changes or healthy habits, eating etc that you're trying to incorporate, so that he can hopefully accept, support and encourage you. It also makes it easier to stick to! And also, keep seeking new motivational cues constantly throughout your weight loss journey ( Things to work towards, Such as a new outfit or sexy something to wear for your partner, a goal weight, lowering health risks, pants size, fat percentage, or a specific achievement like a fitness goal-I got into running and having events to work towards really helped me) If you can keep moving towards something, it is more likely that will keep you going in the right direction Best of luck!