Need to vent. Depressed.

amydcarlson

I'm up late. I was hungry, but just had some Healthy Request soup & one of those single-serving popcorn things. Anyway, I struggle with depression, and I am weaning off of Effexor because it made my blood pressure very high and will start Cymbalta next week. Also, it's my time of the month.....so basically I'm an emotional wreck.... :sad:

I just need to ***** about a couple of things:

1) My boyfriend had a Hungry Man frozen dinner, 2 grilled cheese sandwiches, and 2 eggs for dinner, then munched on peanuts until he went to bed. I had oatmeal. I work out almost daily. He comes to the pool with me a couple of times a week. He has the slightest hint of a belly, but otherwise is built like a bronzed god. I'm fat. HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE??? This is just not fair! Can anyone out there relate?

and

2) I keep seeing posts from people talking about "I just can't eat all of my calories" and "I'm too full"....WHAT???? I wish that was my problem. I am just on the verge of hungry all day, and very hungry at night. Add some insomnia to that and by 1:30 a.m., I am freaking FAMISHED!

I am so jealous it drives me nuts! Does anyone else feel like this? I just had to get this crap off of my chest. Sorry it's kind-of a downer of a post....

Thanks for being there, everybody. I really need the support of this community. I'm so glad I found this place.

sara_m83

I hate that in addition to having a higher daily calorie allowance than me, my boyfriend burns more calories working LESS hard at the same exercise we both do (ie: going for a bike ride together - i have to put in more effort to keep pace with him and at the end of the ride he's burned 200 more calories than I have!)

koops5

I know what you mean. My husband is a very slight man. He eats like a horse and I'm the one who's over weight. It just doesn't seem fair. :sad:
I also suffer from depression and my moods effect my eating. I'm in a good place mentally though at the moment so I think I'm just gonna go for it and lose this blubber.

LoseItCorinne

Try and keep your head up sister.. You have lost 4 pounds so far.. Think about it.. thats 4 1lbs of ground beef.. thats a lot. You have the right to feel this way, to cry. to be upset. Its called being human.

You are beautiful and im sure have an amazing personality and always positive when you comment on successes or struggles your friends on here have had, That shows you are a caring person.

And for your bronze god.. Hes with you and loves you for you. Thats your god swimming with you a few days a week. And we all know how much easier it is for men to burn calories than it is for us ladies.

Im happy you vented. its a good thing. It lifts a weight of your chest. :0)

So long story short.. Cheer up Buttercup!

You are fabulous!

Corinne :0)

Natolee72

SIGH....:flowerforyou:

dkat426

you're not alone!

shaunarlr83

My husband can eat like a horse and gain absolutely nothing!!!!!!! I met him in mid Sept. 2008 and 2 months later of eating like him, I couldn't fit into my favorite pair of jeans, now 2+ years together I have gained 30 + lbs. and that is with trying sporadicly to eat less and exercise......haha ( he just called me from the road to tell me he bought himself some subway cookies) lol anyway I was going to add the worst part is hearing him gripe that he can't gain weight, he thinks he is too skinny ugh, I could only dream of such problems......and I have late night hunger cravings EVERY single night, so you are not alone!!!!!

Jena_72

My husband Big Buff dude gains 10-15 lbs THINKS about losing it.... 5 mins later... it'a gone!! :huh: WTH!? He eats CRAP all the time! But nothing happens I just LOOK at his hostess cupcakes I gain a pound! Now I don't know enough to tell you if you should eat more I can't view your diary, but if you are working out you need to eat. BUT it is what your eating that is important too. You mentioned soup and late at night canned soups are VERY high in sodium, probably not the best choice for late at night although it was probably low in cals you don't need all that sodium at a time you will be going to sleep an d won't be drinking water. I normally would say being a little hungry late at night before bed is a not a terrible thing, for most people its just go to sleep and you wont feel hungry anymore. But if you are having insomnia issues, and you WONT be going to sleep anytime soon then yes you should eat something but a better choice might be an apple and 1 tbspn of peanut butter or almond butter.
YOU ARE DEFINATELY NOT A LONE!! It is time to feel like we match our men!! :drinker: Good luck with your weight loss!

thnksfrthmmrs

You certainly are not alone! Im terrible for snacking at night, nothing better than a bag of crisps and a can of coke when i sit down to watch Eastenders. So i know how you feel, infact i think all us ladies know how you feel.

And as for the male part - its a right pain. My partner also eats what the hell he wants and although has a slight podge never puts on as much as i was.

As the other lady said, you have lost 4lbs so far, you are on the right track so hang in there! Youll do great. X

izzycoyote

I also suffer from depression, and as it's 1am, my insomnia is showing, too!
On point #2: TOTALLY agree! What the heck's the secret?? And can I sign up for that?
I hope you've heard from all of these awesome posts that you're not alone in your feelings or your situation. You hang in there, and I will, too

jenblwr

I can totally relate to what you're saying...I had a really "down" day yesterday myself.

I met my fiance almost 4 years ago, and I was a UK size 8....I started eating like him and within a few months, I was a size 12...then a 14...I've been trying on and off (with exercise and diet) to lose the weight for about a year now, but I never seem to get anywhere...and meanwhile, he sits there eating what he wants, doing no exercise and not gaining any weight!!

I spend all my time hungry now..even when I've just eaten a meal...so you aren't alone.

Like others have said - you're doing really well so far...stick with it, and I'm sure you'll get there and start feeling more positive soon! :flowerforyou:

pamp1emousse

You know what, your boyfriend might have it easy now, but come 40 he's going to get middle-aged-man syndrome and balloon, and YOU will have 20 years' experience in how to eat healthily and look after yourself and you're going to look AMAZING. And he'll have no idea what hit him. HA. Us girls get the last laugh, don't you worry

And yeah, all this "I can't eat all my calories" makes me jealous too... I just don't read those posts lol.

Good for you for venting, and I'm sorry you're feeling down :flowerforyou:

backinthenines

I met my other half through sport as we were both training for the same triathlon.

He weighs about 76kg at 6'2", and it's all lean mass - you can't pinch an inch. He eats like there's no tomorrow. I am convinced he has hollow legs!! :huh:

But.... having said all that... when I stop making excuses I can see that he puts in many more miles and hours than I do, and he's also a lot faster. Maybe if I put that much effort in I could be as lean as him... hahaha

EvelynForsyth

I feel your pain!
I struggle with being hungry ALL THE TIME.Thats the worst thing about this process,i enjoy exercise and i drink alot of water but i just can't seem to deal with being hungry.

How does everyone else deal with hunger? i've been having hot drinks etc. but they only help for a little bit!

I IWSH i was full or had calorie count left over...argh!

TiffanyAml

You are doing awesome! We all have been at a constant gain until we changed our lifestyle. You have lost 4 lbs - great! Another way to look at it, you could have gained 4 lbs in that time like you used to, and be 8 lbs heavier than you are now. Instead you are on your way! The people who can't eat all their calories are fakes. Just eat your healthy foods from the earth. Nuts, berries, fish, veggies, spinach! You will shed shed shed and your skin will glow! Have a nice cup of organic acai berry tea at night, it creates glowing skin, tastes amazing and then head to sleep early. When you want to snack late at night - shut everything down. Have your tea, or a glass of water. Maybe some raw mushrooms and a hand full of nuts and brush your teeth and head straight to bed. The more sleep you get, the more weight you lose, the sharper and healthier your brain is. The less time you have to eat at night too I am 5'9 and was 190 lbs. I am 152.8 right now (hopefully tomorrow 151!) I joined mfp about a month ago to lose the last 15 ( I was 161 when I joined) or so lbs. The calorie counting works. Stay focused, plan out your meals and snacks at the beginning of the day. You can do this. You are going to get your hot *kitten* body back. I am married to a man who is 5 years younger than me and he just lost 22 lbs in 6 week by doing MFP and I lost 8 lbs in that 6 weeks. Don't focus on the comparison. Everyone will go at a different rate and their bodies will looks different. Ignore that or it will be too challenging. You can't help that your body functions different, but you can help what you focus on to change our body. Focus on the healthy new body you are creating for yourself.

When it is late at night. Shut it all down and go to sleep (ignore the time stamp on this lol). You will feel your best when you sleep 8 hours, and you will eat less and weigh less because you are in bed and not eating or even thinking about it. After time, your body won't want to eat as much. It will get used to the amount of food you are eating. Eat your proteins and fibers and fill up on the good stuff. Soon you won't want to snack as much, you will be fulfilled with your smaller portioned healthy choices. Go to trader joes tomorrow and grab some healthy low cal snacks to fill around the house, it will help. Snacks we love, Raw almonds, white mushrooms, raw blueberries, cherries, bakes potato chips (not too many!), peanut butter on rice cakes, celery sticks. Organic everything if you can. Oh, Trader Joes has those great organic apple slices bags. Easy to reseal and grab a few slices when you are urging to snack. Toss all the bad foods. Fill up on the foods from the earth. You can do it! Just think, in 4 weeks you will be 10 lighter. That's 14 lbs lost instead of 14 lbs gained. DO IT.

In the words of the great late Michael jackson: You are not alone.

bjshooter

You know what, your boyfriend might have it easy now, but come 40 he's going to get middle-aged-man syndrome and balloon, and YOU will have 20 years' experience in how to eat healthily and look after yourself and you're going to look AMAZING. And he'll have no idea what hit him. HA. Us girls get the last laugh, don't you worry

And yeah, all this "I can't eat all my calories" makes me jealous too... I just don't read those posts lol.

Good for you for venting, and I'm sorry you're feeling down :flowerforyou:

Looool this ^^ I love the term middle aged man syndrome

I hope this happens to my recently ex b/f. Thats a bit mean isnt it? But argh how do these people eat so much rubbish, never move a muscle and still stay so thin

I feel your pain though, I am also depressed and on anti depressents that make you put on weight I am recently dunped and a single mother and I am dying to be one of those people that use it to get thin and amazing the 'breakover' but I just want to eat, ALL the time and preferably chocolate

FK1983

Hey! don't go picking on men! it isn't easy for us either!
I know how you feel though, seeing other people being able to eat ANYTHING and not gain ANY weight at all, I've had to avoid so much stuff to lose the weight I have so far, it is tough and not always fair!

amydcarlson

Thank you so much for all of your support and suggestions! I LOVE YOU ALL!!! Last night was rough for me, but thanks to all of of you, I finally fell asleep (with a smile on my face, in fact!) and woke up with a much better attitude today.

Thank you for being there. :smooched:

izzycoyote

TiffanyAml's post was awesome (thank you!!), and the only thing I would add is that I know how I WANT to eat (like TiffanyAml!), but I've tried transforming my eating habits overnight, and--for me--this causes a rubber band effect: I end up splurging on something "bad", which just causes me to feel awful about myself & my progress, and I just tumble on down the hill back towards where I was (or worse). I now know that I need to make those changes incrementally, step by step, or they won't stick. An example: The doc just told me to remove these items from my diet: dairy, pineapple, banana, almonds, peanuts, garlic, glutin, eggs, and possibly sugar cane. Overwhelming, right? So I've split it into 3 phases (dairy/pine/banana/almonds/pnuts first, then garlic/glutin/eggs, then sugar cane). I'm starting stage 2 and it feels really good--like I've accomplished something, and I've had time to realize how great the changes make me feel. Be patient with yourself

improvstitute

You know what, your boyfriend might have it easy now, but come 40 he's going to get middle-aged-man syndrome and balloon

It all comes back to you. I am now "that guy" mentioned above. I will be 40 in April and it is harder to lose the weight these days. Hang in there, Amy and know at 2am there are a ton of us out here battling the urge to eat. As they say...nothing good happens at 2am! We've got your back!!

amydcarlson

You know what, your boyfriend might have it easy now, but come 40 he's going to get middle-aged-man syndrome and balloon

It all comes back to you. I am now "that guy" mentioned above. I will be 40 in April and it is harder to lose the weight these days. Hang in there, Amy and know at 2am there are a ton of us out here battling the urge to eat. As they say...nothing good happens at 2am! We've got your back!!

Maybe I should have him read your post :laugh: In the meantime, I will try to enjoy his sexy a** before it all goes to hell in 10 years, Lol!

izzycoyote

LOL!