Need to vent

pmd14

I feel so disgusted, depressed or maybe it is just sad. I am 100 pounds away from my "ideal" weight. I would like to lose about 70 pounds. I am just so tired of thinking about "dieting" or "changing my lifestlye". Since september I have tried to increase my activity level, added walking and weights, tried to decrease my portions, etc. I have lost a few pounds but????????? I just feel this weight loss thing is such a struggle and I'm not sure I'm up for it. I don't want to have to think about everything I eat and drink. People say it will become second nature but no it doesn't. I still want that whole bowl of pasta and a few beers.
In the summer I belong to a beach club. There is lots of kicking back having fun which includes drinking and eating. I don't want to watch everythng I want to just enjoy. I do walk along the ocean and swim but never enough to counter what I eat.
I don't know. This has always been my problem. I can do well for just so long then get disgusted and give up. It just seems so not worth it. I feel I have struggled so much to lose just a few pounds. They say you didn't gain it over night so you can't lose it quick but you know what it does seem so much easier to gain weight than to lose it.

pmd14

I feel so disgusted, depressed or maybe it is just sad. I am 100 pounds away from my "ideal" weight. I would like to lose about 70 pounds. I am just so tired of thinking about "dieting" or "changing my lifestlye". Since september I have tried to increase my activity level, added walking and weights, tried to decrease my portions, etc. I have lost a few pounds but????????? I just feel this weight loss thing is such a struggle and I'm not sure I'm up for it. I don't want to have to think about everything I eat and drink. People say it will become second nature but no it doesn't. I still want that whole bowl of pasta and a few beers.
In the summer I belong to a beach club. There is lots of kicking back having fun which includes drinking and eating. I don't want to watch everythng I want to just enjoy. I do walk along the ocean and swim but never enough to counter what I eat.
I don't know. This has always been my problem. I can do well for just so long then get disgusted and give up. It just seems so not worth it. I feel I have struggled so much to lose just a few pounds. They say you didn't gain it over night so you can't lose it quick but you know what it does seem so much easier to gain weight than to lose it.

amylynne26

Ok I totally could have written this post.... I have lost about 7 pounds, about 40 to go.... I bust my butt for a couple of weeks and then just fizzle out. People say (about exercise) "find something you enjoy!" well guess what I enjoy watching tv while eating cupcakes. not particularly conducive to a healthy lifestyle....

I keep telling myself that nothing tastes as good as thin feels but you know what? I haven't felt "thin" in so long I don't even know what it is like anymore... and I do love me some mashed potatoes!

So I guess I'm not offering any advice, just letting you know there's someone out there that feels the same. Maybe we are just the type that needs to daily kick our own arses and reach out to all the great people on MFP to kick us a little too. Send me a message ANYTIME maybe we can help motivate each other out of this nasty funk!!

Amy :flowerforyou:

kellch

Tell me about it!!! I've actually lost 20lbs in a year. BUT....I love me some food...And I have a fiance that can eat like a cow and not gain an ounce(makes it even harder):grumble: But ya know, now that I'm finally 20lbs lighter and can see results and wear some of those nice clothes I always looked at but knew I couldnt wear them, I feel so good about it. It's such an accomplishment. And I always take one day every week and eat one meal that I don't worry about the calories. (I try to be reasonable kind of sort of....well not really) But as long as I don't overdo it, I think it's good to treat yourself. Then you don't deprive yourself too much.....OH another thing that's worked for me........GET A DOG!!! LOL I feel bad if I dont walk my dog several times a day and play with him a little bit. And that helped me get started. Now I walk 2-4 miles a day with him and walk on my lunch break......speaking of, I've got 30 minutes left of lunch, I've gotta go walk..........Oh on those days u really really dont want to do anything, force yourself......you feel so much better afterwards... Don't give up and we're here for ya if ya need us.

Benson

You are telling my story!! Don't give up okay? I have been gaining back anywhere from 3-6 lbs almost every weekend. I don't drink and I'm certainly not eating "over" my calories by 20,000!! I chalk it up to the aging experience and tell myself to try harder. I have gained and lost the same darn lbs to the point where, if I could keep them off I would be at goal!! However - I also know that I no longer have to take a handful of antacid tabs to sleep at night and that I am no longer so out of breath just climbing the basement stairs with laundry! Baby steps! My goal for June is to take off 10 lbs.(3 of which are gone - for today) I want to get to one Monday weigh-in that shows a loss and not a gain! I'm hoping that is this monday. We can do this!

Heather

KatWood

I totally understand where you are coming from. I am wondering if maybe you are looking at this too much like a diet instead of a new lifestyle. Don't think of it as trying to reach a specific weight but rather the start of a new healthier lifestyle that will not end when you reach your goal weight. I know this may seem depressing at first, but really it is kind of liberating because it doesn't mean you have to be perfect all the time. You can have a big bowl of pasta and beer every once and a while and not feel guilty about it. Also, it's about substitution. Eat whole wheat pasta instead of white and add a lot of grilled vegetables to the sauce. That way you won't need as much of the pasta itself and will stay full. Also, you need to realize that although eating whatever you want might make you feel good in that moment, it won't last, whereas being healthier and more confident with who you are will improve every area of your life for the rest of your life.

Also, I use to be the queen of excuses. "I have no time to exercise", "healthy food is expensive and doesn't taste good", "I can't lose weight. Maybe I was meant to be this big", "This isn't fair", etc. I decided that unless I stopped with the excuses and admitted that I alone am responsible for my life, body and overall health I was never going to lose the weight.

Hope it doesn't sound like I am preaching. I have just been where you are and this is what has worked for me. Good luck and stay positive. I know it sounds cliche but it does get a little easier.

pmd14

Thanks for showing me I'm not alone.
It's just so frustrating!!!!!!
I have found something I enjoy WALKING. I love it. I'm not working now so no excuses. Everyday I put on my sneakers and walk. Some days a mile or two, some uphill and other day a long walk. Yesterday I walked 8 miles. It was great but...........
You know there is always a but. I ate too much!!!! So yeah I probably didn't gain but I didn't lose either. It's not the sweets or junk food either. I love food!!! I have no concept of prtion control. When I look at 3ounces of protien and 1/2 cup of starch I seriously laugh. ARE YOU KIDDING ME???
I have been tryng to just get under 200 for so long it hurts to think about it.
In the past I had too much stress from work and family to really give it the big effort it needed but since september I have been REALLY trying and net result is 223 pounds. I know it's a loss but I really thought by now I would be under 200!!!!!
My husband is over 300 pounds. I have been trying to get him on board but no luck there.

beep

You may be trying to change too many things at once. I would just keep logging in your food for awhile just to see where you are, so you can make little changes. If you think of it as depriving yourself all the time, you will continue to get discouraged. You can go to those beach parties, just plan ahead for that to be a free day and as long as you're not doing it every day, you should be fine. After a few weeks (and I know this because I had pasta last night, and I make GOOD pasta) you will be able to enjoy a bowl of pasta, and not gain a ton. I had some last night, but got on the scale today after not losing anything for a week and lo and behold another pound gone.

KatWood

I am not sure what your starting weight was but if it helps I started at 245 in June 2007 and it took me until March 2008 to get to 194. I am now at 184. It is a slow process which can be really frustrating.

I agree that you shouldn't take on too much too fast. Start with small changes. Doing to much to fast will seem overwhelming. And although I know it is hard but try not to stress about it too much. If you are making positive changes eventually you will see results. And please please don't become obsessed with the scale. The scale can truly be an evil thing. Increasing numbers does not necessarily mean you are gaining weight and constant numbers does not mean you are not losing weight either.

I too am trying to get the hubby on board. My biggest problem is lack of motivation to exercise and being accountable to someone else besides just myself I know works for me. I had a trainer for a while but I can't afford to keep him :sad: Plus, with an upcoming wedding him shedding a few pounds off his beer belly wouldn't hurt.

pmd14

I have been logging in my calories and about half the time I am over.
I tried to log at the start of the day to sort of pre plan but ......
again with the buts I usually eat more than I should have
I am trying to think of this as a "life change" that's why I am making small changes and not eating boiled chicken and salad.
But when I look at a portion size for protein and see 3 ounces or a starch and see 1/2 cup I can't help and laugh. I am trying to SLOWLY decrease my usual portion size and eliminate heavy fats (no fried food or cream sauce etc,) and increase my activity but the scale is not moving and neither are my measurements. Ok they moved but not fast enough. It's been 7 months now of this "new" lifestyle.
come on now

lessertess

You're on the right track. Make changes slowly. Begin by cutting your portions just a little and make a concentrated effort to always leave something on your plate. How are you doing on water? If you get those 8-10 glasses in a day, you'll automatically control some of your portions. Some other things to try:

* Eat 6 small meals a day
* Always drink a glass of water before the meal and drink a glass during the meal.
* Try eating a large salad or crunchy vegetables about 15 minutes before your main meal.
* Start thinking of your vegetables as a main course and the pasta or lean protien as a side dish.
* Purchase some small bowls and plates.
* Eat with chopsticks

Although I'm not a huge fan of fake food there are some substitues that can help. Even with the same portion sizes you can cut calories:

Low fat cheese, milk, yogurt
Reduced fat sour cream
Reduced fat mayonaisse
Reduced Sugar Ketchup
Reduced calorie breads
Tomato and broth based soups and sauces instead of cheese or cream sauces
Fruit instead of candy
Popcorn (control the oil and butter) instead of potato chips

There are tons more, but you get the idea!

You're doing great on the walking! You have to be feeling good about that.

Don't give up. You can do this.

If you haven't read it yet, I highly recommend "You: On a Diet" and "You: The Owners Manual".

Liana25

I've definitely had one of those weeks especially these last 3 days where I've eaten fatty foods that I know I'm going to pay for. I went a little can't do this anymore when I hit my plateau at 240 and 20 pounds later I want to get below 200 which I haven't been since I was 12 and yet I had a complete I'm tired of the work and of not eating foods and amounts I used to moment and ending up not exercising or eating right but come Sunday I'll get back at it and stick with it for 2 or 3 maybe even 4 weeks then I'll have another few days of not being exact. I know this because it gets tiring but the point is even if I take a week off that I do eventually get back at it. Sometimes you need a little vacation but as long as you decide to get back to the routine you'll make it.