MY HUSBAND

jaydedfaery

My husband is not negative about me trying to lose weight, acutally he is all for it. However, he is not so fast as to getting on the band wagon. He is overweight as well, but, to get him to eat healthy is really hard. Cooking healthy is even harder because he hates any veggies except lima and charro beans. Anyone have ideas on how to get him on the band wagon. Any recipes would be great as well.

Thanks in advance!:happy:

jaydedfaery

My husband is not negative about me trying to lose weight, acutally he is all for it. However, he is not so fast as to getting on the band wagon. He is overweight as well, but, to get him to eat healthy is really hard. Cooking healthy is even harder because he hates any veggies except lima and charro beans. Anyone have ideas on how to get him on the band wagon. Any recipes would be great as well.

Thanks in advance!:happy:

PrincessLaundry

I will hunt down one of my artichoke chicken pasta recipes...DELISH!

My husband is very supportive and I don't know if he has a timer going or something but will even call during the day, ask what I'm doing, ask what we had for lunch, then congrats me on doing so well. I think one of the things I did for the most part, I didn't ask, didn't push, didn't do anything for my DH. He saw me eating right and now has changed his eating on his "own"...I just didn't shop for junk, cook junk, and when he offered to go out for a meal, I said that I didn't want to because I'm working too hard and don't want to mess it up! It took a few weekends of me eating better, and him to not shove chocolate chips on his ice cream for snack, but now he's eating lighter, less, and even offers to help me weigh my foods!

Soo...maybe doing nothing, but sticking to your guns will help! Good luck! Let us know how you do, and if he keeps up with you. Good luck!

LokiFae

My husband wasn't all for it in the beginning either, but then, as I cleaned out our cupboards of all the crap food, and the only option he had was the good for you stuff, he now prefers it.

We made homemade granola the other day (not exactly low in calories, but still REALLY good for you) and we took it on a long car trip. He turns to me in the middle of eating it and says, "You know, I never thought I'd say this, but homemade granola is a lot better than a stinky old bag of chips." :noway: This was coming from a man who used to polish off an entire bag of Cheetos and three or four Mountain Dews when he came home from work.

So I would say, just don't push the issue, and cook only one meal at night. He might complain at first, but tell him that it's important to you that the whole family gets healthy. And he doesn't have to eat a ton of veggies at first. Just make what he likes, but with whole wheat. Whole wheat bread, pasta, tortillas, etc. are a great first way to transition into a healthy lifestyle. Good luck!

pmkelly409

I told my DH that I have 4 prospects on Match.com - since he was not planning on living as long as me I needed to have a backup plan!

Whenever he is a bad boy, I tell him that those match.com men are just waiting for him to kick the bucket!

(of course I was kidding but it just really gets to his ego when I say it...)

eHarris

Mine was the same way! He's hooked on the Atkins diet, wants only meat and broccoli. I'm more along the lines of a balanced diet and told him "You can eat almost anything in moderation, and if it grows in the ground consider it good for you." Now I don't promote eating three baked potatoes each meal....but the man was telling me he wasn't allowed to eat black eye peas and baby green peas for cryin out loud.

He's a very big "Black or White" kind of guy. HUGE. He thinks if a diet says low carb...its better not to eat them at all. But he'll sit down at Texas Rhode House and order a 16oz steak. Thats a pound of steak people! Crazyness I tell ya!!!

Anyways...when we were doing well and we were both faithful (this site is part of my climb back onto the wagon) I would buy healthy stuff to cook. Lean meats, fresh/frozen veggies, fruits, and low carb or low sugar snacks. That was it! No exceptions. And nothing from my kitchen was fried...Nothing!! I made a dinner and we ate off of salad plates to controll portions. But dinner was what I made ...and nothing more. I have too many things to do to prepare a meal for one person.

Cook a nice healthy dinner, tell him to eat what he chooses but thats all YOU'RE making. If he wants something else he will either have to make it himself or buy it himself. The thing is...you can't force him to change his lifestyle. You can't make him want to join you on your journey. What you can do is put the responsibility back on HIM. When you start loosing the weight and he's still stuck in the same place...things will start to change...I promise.

Sometimes it helps to be sneaky.

AJCM

I told my DH that I have 4 prospects on Match.com - since he was not planning on living as long as me I needed to have a backup plan!

Whenever he is a bad boy, I tell him that those match.com men are just waiting for him to kick the bucket!

(of course I was kidding but it just really gets to his ego when I say it...)

You are HILARIOUS.... hahahaha... I love it...
:laugh:

AJCM

Does he like curries? My hubby and kids will eat lots of veg in curry sauces. Instead of the creamy sauces (because we don't do dairy) I make a really spicy and flavourful curry base with a carrots soup (onions, ginger, garlic, curry powder, cumin, and of course carrots and chicken stock) then blend it up until smooth. They will all eat it as soup and as a curry base (through in chicken, snow peas, chick peas, cauliflower or add peppers, broccoli, etc.

There is also a cookbook by Jessica Seinfeld, "Deliciously Deceptive" which has lots of great recipes that sneak veggies into food. A pasta with julienned roasted veggies might work too. You can also puree veg like red peppers (roasted) and carrots into tomato sauces.

Good luck!
:flowerforyou:

kak1018

Keep at him! My husband was the same way, drank over 40 oz of soda a day (regular) ate at every fast food daily. He was facing serious health issues at only 25 years old. 5 years later he is 50lbs lighter, eats sensibly, and is getting ready for an iron man tri. I can't keep up with him anymore! There is tremendous power in leading by example. Good luck to you!

FYI you can sneak veggies in anything if you have a food processor!!!:laugh:

gabi_ele

I told my DH that I have 4 prospects on Match.com - since he was not planning on living as long as me I needed to have a backup plan!
Whenever he is a bad boy, I tell him that those match.com men are just waiting for him to kick the bucket!
(of course I was kidding but it just really gets to his ego when I say it...)
[/quote
I just love that Idea ( hope you don't mind if I borrow it?)
My husband is all for me loosing weight, he on the other hand drinks regular Coke by the case and eats potatoe chips every night. Since he doesn't have a weight problem I let him eat what he wants ,but when I cook, I use lean meat, fresh or frozen veggies and potatoes ( which sometimes I'll eat a little off but I eat mostly the meat and veggies) He doesn't care for whole wheat so I have my bread and he has his, on the pasta I just eat less . I agree with the other Ladies, if you're forcing it on him he will protest, just do your food and exercises and brag about how much more energie you have:laugh: oh and don't forget to go to match.com:devil:

Wizzle

I agree with you. Men have a completely different take on what a "diet" is. My fiancé and I are both dieting, but we do it different ways. I am about balance and moderation (which I see a lot of you saying) and he is about either not eating or eating small amts. , but not always the healthiest stuff. I think it just boils down to that men and women are very different.

A suggestion for your Hubby who is having a hard time. Try making him a homemade pizza. For instance, select an all wheat crust, tomato sauce, cheese made with 2%, and top with his fav. fresh veggies. Most men I know can't resist pizza and this is still a healthy way to get him to eat, but still enjoy the foods he likes.

Also, keep in mind that men have to eat more calories/fat then women a day. So, when I cook dinner for my fiancé and I: I might add a dish to our dinner that I might not have the calories left for, but he does. For example, low fat cheesy string potatoes. They are easy, quick, and taste great.

To help him burn those extra pounds, ask him to take a walk with you after dinner. He might not always say yes, but if he does he is not only burning calories, but spending some extra time with you. I try to work this in with my fiancé. Needless to say it doesn't always work, but sometimes it does.

Keep up the good work. He will eventually start to follow your eating habits. Recent studies have shown that if one partner begins to lose weight, biologically the other will start to follow the same pattern in fear of losing their mate for one reason or another. Look at it this way, son he will warm up to the idea and then you'll have another buddy besides MFP to help keep you on track.






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PrincessLaundry

I told my DH that I have 4 prospects on Match.com - since he was not planning on living as long as me I needed to have a backup plan!

LOL LOVE IT! How funny.

kerrilucko

My fiance is the same way, he eats horribly. he is very supportive in my quest to lose weight but he thinks that since he is thin and relatively fit that its ok for him to binge on cookies and candy and potato chips. I'm so sick of prepping different meals for him everyday, lol :explode:

Sarah_S

My husband and I both need to lose weight, badly. He comes up with every excuse in the book though. Last time I did this (eat healthy, and exercise regularly) he did get on the band wagpn with me, but it took a while. I just started doing this again on Monday. He is not here with me yet but I think over time he will see me losing weight and becoming healthy and join me. I took my son on a walk on Monday, and today I brought my son on a walk, and my daughter rode her bike with me. Eventually he will realize how much fun we have on our walks, and will want to come too. But for now, he will just sit on the sidelines

I hope your husband comes around soon.

cecreech

I was this man. I am a recovering idiot, sad but hopeful. I once saw myself as the invincible skinniness, no cheeto or porkskin could harm me - I thought. Then I turned thirty and I realized that life was good and my weight wasn't that bad, a few extra pounds, nothing crazy. Still felt and ate like a 17 year old soccer star and thought that my work at the hospital would keep me just as fit. Then I hit 40 and my kids were in their teens and I looked in the mirror and did not resemble anything human. I was round. The roundness had crept upon me and I had not really noticed but suddenly I knew it was there. My spouse, the cook of the house, tried to warn me, she had attempted in vain to change my evil and overly carnivorous ways. But I made it hard for her. I told her I didn't want healthy food. Alas, she gave up one day. No longer was I offered cucumber soup or salad but rather mac and cheese and pizza and steak and potatoes and gravy. I ate chips, candy, cookies. I ate all I wanted every day. Now I am approaching 50 and I have repented in sackcloth and ashes. No longer do I yearn for Krispy Kreme. I run the other way from fat. I abstain from foods I think will harm me and I eat everything else in moderation. My problem is that now that I have "a clue" my wife will no longer cook anything healthy any more. She is struggling with more weight than I am. I told her how right she was about eating less and healthier and she just eats more ice cream.
So, the moral of the story is, even if he's that way, don't you be that way. One day you may both regret it.

ohthatbambi

I have been cycling. Hubby started riding with me some a couple months ago. Now he is all into it. Bought both of us new...good bikes. He even registered on this website last night to track his food intake. I never thought he would. I never asked him to. He just started making changes. He was asking me all sorts of questions last night about what he should eat. I showed him this site and he was all into it. Don't know if he logged anything in yet today. So we will see. Just keep encouraging him and maybe he will make changes.

eHarris

cecreech: I'm so sorry to hear that your wife seems to be down. Maybe you could try offering to cook with her. Look up recipes on line you find interesting and the two of you get the supplies and cook together. Maybe make it a fun/romantic date night. You cook dinner together, eat by candle light, and see where the night goes.

Another idea might be to offer an incentive. Tell her you want to take her on a cruise or something. Sometimes having goals like that can kick start your motivation again. I know for me ...its my one year anniversary...I want to go to Jamaica. Even if it takes me to my birthday (which is a couple months later) to meet my goal weight...I want to feel good enough about me (and a bathingsuit) that I don't dread that trip.

I don't know what your situation is completly so I'm throwing this out there off the cuff. When I get to the point where I give into that tub of ice cream...I am my hardest critic. I don't want to look at myself in the mirror, I refuse to buy clothes, and I feel guilty for every morsel of food I put in my mouth. On those days (weeks, months..whatever) my husband is literally the only person who can pull me out of it. He'll cook good dinners for me, tell me how beautiful I am and show me extra affection, and he's firm but kind. He reminds me that I'm struggling for more than just myself, because sometimes I think "It doesn't hurt anyone but me ...why do they care?" When I get like that ...I just need someone to gently take my hand and lead me back to the starting line, point me in the right direction, and whisper in my ear that no matter how many times I trip and fall, they will still be just as proud of me for being in the race.

fatsis

Tell him the sex is better after weightloss. That always works on us.

Seriously start by drowning veggies in butter, cheese, or ranch. Then little by little start using healthy dips. I cant promise but it is worth a try. At least U would B cooking veggies 4 both of U.

I wish I could get my wife involved. I hate seeing her so unhappy. I am hoping 2 silently motivate her.

ohthatbambi

I was this man. I am a recovering idiot, sad but hopeful. I once saw myself as the invincible skinniness, no cheeto or porkskin could harm me - I thought. Then I turned thirty and I realized that life was good and my weight wasn't that bad, a few extra pounds, nothing crazy. Still felt and ate like a 17 year old soccer star and thought that my work at the hospital would keep me just as fit. Then I hit 40 and my kids were in their teens and I looked in the mirror and did not resemble anything human. I was round. The roundness had crept upon me and I had not really noticed but suddenly I knew it was there. My spouse, the cook of the house, tried to warn me, she had attempted in vain to change my evil and overly carnivorous ways. But I made it hard for her. I told her I didn't want healthy food. Alas, she gave up one day. No longer was I offered cucumber soup or salad but rather mac and cheese and pizza and steak and potatoes and gravy. I ate chips, candy, cookies. I ate all I wanted every day. Now I am approaching 50 and I have repented in sackcloth and ashes. No longer do I yearn for Krispy Kreme. I run the other way from fat. I abstain from foods I think will harm me and I eat everything else in moderation. My problem is that now that I have "a clue" my wife will no longer cook anything healthy any more. She is struggling with more weight than I am. I told her how right she was about eating less and healthier and she just eats more ice cream.
So, the moral of the story is, even if he's that way, don't you be that way. One day you may both regret it.

I don't know whether to laugh or cry at that story. I remember many a nights that I ate salad and hubby ate whatever he wanted. I can now say proudly that we are both on the same page now. I wish the same for you my friend.

AJCM

I was this man. I am a recovering idiot, sad but hopeful. I once saw myself as the invincible skinniness, no cheeto or porkskin could harm me - I thought. Then I turned thirty and I realized that life was good and my weight wasn't that bad, a few extra pounds, nothing crazy. Still felt and ate like a 17 year old soccer star and thought that my work at the hospital would keep me just as fit. Then I hit 40 and my kids were in their teens and I looked in the mirror and did not resemble anything human. I was round. The roundness had crept upon me and I had not really noticed but suddenly I knew it was there. My spouse, the cook of the house, tried to warn me, she had attempted in vain to change my evil and overly carnivorous ways. But I made it hard for her. I told her I didn't want healthy food. Alas, she gave up one day. No longer was I offered cucumber soup or salad but rather mac and cheese and pizza and steak and potatoes and gravy. I ate chips, candy, cookies. I ate all I wanted every day. Now I am approaching 50 and I have repented in sackcloth and ashes. No longer do I yearn for Krispy Kreme. I run the other way from fat. I abstain from foods I think will harm me and I eat everything else in moderation. My problem is that now that I have "a clue" my wife will no longer cook anything healthy any more. She is struggling with more weight than I am. I told her how right she was about eating less and healthier and she just eats more ice cream.
So, the moral of the story is, even if he's that way, don't you be that way. One day you may both regret it.

I don't know whether to laugh or cry at that story. I remember many a nights that I ate salad and hubby ate whatever he wanted. I can now say proudly that we are both on the same page now. I wish the same for you my friend.

Cecreech - thanks for sharing you story... we've tried to make the family committment to healthy eating, so when one of us gets the urge for the donut, there is a team to pull us back from the brink!

You WILL lose your weight, I believe it. This site is an amazing tool. Maybe you and your wife could both log on regularly? Best of success!!!
:flowerforyou:

jaydedfaery

Thanks everyone...I am hoping some of your suggestions work!!