Supporting loved ones to start losing

wyatt_sheeder

Okay, so I am as guilty as anyone. I've been up and down on the scale since high school. However, recently I've discovered how important losing weight and eating healthy is to my overall health goals, not just weightloss. So, I'm trying to get my boyfriend to eat better as well. We don't live in the same city so mostly we just check in each day a few times on the phone. He knows what I'm doing and he recently started Weight Watchers. I just don't want to sound bossy or judgemental when I talk to him. Does anyone have any suggestions or stories you can share of your own?
All Ears,
wy

Sara1978

I wish I knew. Both my husband and one of my good friends are over weight-- the friend, really, really severely overweight. I care about both of them very much, and I'd love to *help*, but my husband seems to just shut off when I bring up the subject, and I don't even know how to bring the topic up with my friend for fear of insulting him and hurting the friendship.

You're not alone, certainly! I'm looking forward to hearing what others have experienced if they've tried to bring these things up with people that they care about.

tashajasmine

just give support when he tries, praise when he does good, and encouragement when he fails. you can't force him into a lifestyle change. he has to want to and he won't want to if you pressure him.

dbcja

I have a similar problem except he lives with me. I am overweight, but my husband is a similar weight and thinks becasue he does a pysical job he needs to eat eat eat. On a normal day he eats about 6 weetbix and milk for breaky, I make his lunh which is usually 4 sandwiches with some sort of deli meat and salad, some crackers and cheese, 2-3 peices of fruit, 1 or 2 peies of baking (sweet and homemade with butter), and a couple of museli bars or miniture bags of chippies etc. then dinner, and then come 8.30 he is making himself a whole other meal of cereal, fruit and yougart or sandwiches.

I know he is not eating unhealthly but he is eating CRAP LOAD and cant see that he doesnt need it. I have tried giving him smaller portions, but then he goes and eats crap out the cupboards.

I dont want to nag becasue he needs to make the desicion himself. I am hoping he will see how successful my journey is and decide to go on his own? It worries me. We have 3 little boys who need there mum and dad and we need to look after our own health and show them how to eat sensibly.

wyatt_sheeder

Thanks for the advice. For dbcja, I may approach your husband by asking him to try to approximate the amount of calories he is burning during the day (or you can guess). Then see how much he should be consuming and go from there. Maybe see if he will go to the doctor for a check. Also if you know anyone he works with who eats better see if he might talk to them.

Sara1978, I think approaching your friend and husband put of love might work. Something like,"I really care about you and want you to be around for a long time..." maybe they will react negatively at first but if you are supportive they will see you are serious about helping. One can't help someone who doesn't want to help themselves. That being said I really do think most people are just frustrated and don't know when or how to start. Good luck!