Maybe this is an unpopular opinion but...

poisongirl6485

I agree with you OP. My hubby doesn't eat well...at all. But that's his choice. As long as my friends and family aren't shoving bad food at me knowing full-well that I am trying to be healthy, then all is well.

Helice

I get wat ur saying.
Im on a diet, but my bf is trying to gain weight.
So every night we end up having kfc.
I try to go for just the chips and beans.
But alot of the time i end up eating a burger too..
But weve come up with a solution!
I bought him a chocolate safe!
So any chocolate he buys he sticks in there.
And then even if i wanted i couldnt to it....
Well thats the theory, sept the muppet used the pin he uses for everything else.. lol

Helice

And on a secondary not i think its out of order for people to impose things on other. Especially when it comes to food.
For example, a small one is that my step-mum liz was trying to loose weight wen i was little. So no chocolate, biscuits, crisps, pies, ice cream, etc was allowd in the house. But my step mum always had a box full of weight-watchers chocolate bars at her disposal. And if i so much as looked at one longingly, i'd get the 'the chocolate is for her' lecture. It was like wtf! :O ............................
And another bigger example was easter last year.. i live with a bunch of christian vegertarians. Me myself be a carnivorous wiccan, means i have different beliefs to them. Anyway on easter... a day which to me is 'the day of eating lots of chocolate in egg shapes', me and the other meat eaters where banned from eating meat for the whole day. Because apparently christians cant eat meat on easter. So not only was vegertarianism forced on me, but someones relgiion was forced on me!! I was so pissed i went to kfc!!

jemmur

As a vegan who lives with a boyfriend who'll eat anything that fits in his mouth... I think there are similarities and differences. If you want to live happily with anyone, you've got to be considerate about anything they feel strongly about. Expecting everything to be done entirely your way is unreasonable but neither should you be the only one to make sacrifices. Compromises, two way steet, etc.

I'm a bit of a junkfood addict and I actually find it better to keep a little bit of it in the flat. Every day that it sits untouched is like a little celebration that I'm eating better because I really want to, not because I have to. I also find that when I do eat it, I enjoy it because I've decided to treat myself, rather than desperately scoffing it in a mad urge to eat something junky!

BakingGranny

THAT'S unfair to say ALL Christians are the same.Don't compare us all to one bad experience.

simplywriting

There seems to be a really prevalent opinion that, when we're dieting, our s/o's, family members, etc. need to support us 100% (which is great!) but that support should include not bringing junk food into the home. We all seem to get really upset to find out that hubby brought home some cookies, chips, etc. because it's such a temptation for us.
<snip>
WE made the choice to get healthy, not them. WE are the ones on this journey.
Is it really fair for us to ask those around us to change their habits and sacrifice their favorite foods, just because we're afraid of a little temptation?

I could not agree more with this assessment. While I am eating healthier and trying to lose weight, I am also making small changes in my families diet. (more veggies, less red meat, etc.) I am not forcing ANY of the things I'm eating, but I am doing a lot of explaining why I buy certain things now, why I make certain things the way I do.
I have always cooked from scratch, I just didn't watch serving size, fat content or anything else for that matter. Now I do.
I have five kids and then my husband that I have to feed 3 times a day. I will not take away anything. I encouraged my son to join me on the weight loss journey and to learn to eat healthier and watch his portions a bit better. (he's a teen, so he eats EVERYTHING, and its showing).
My son and I have been doing this together for about 3 weeks now (me, about 5 weeks). What I am seeing, is my children don't go back for "2nds", let alone "3rds" anymore. I don't see them immediately choose the chips or cookies as a snack as often anymore. They are reaching for fruit, veggie sticks, whatever....
They still have all the other stuff available to them.
Honestly, I don't like buying the stuff, because it makes me sad I can't eat it... some things I miss. So I ask my hubby to pick up the stuff for the kids lunches (that's where the chips and snacks seem to be used the most). He does it, I know its in the cabinet, but I don't want to eat it.

By the way, I had a piece of chocolate cake about a week ago or so. I actually did NOT like it... that was a strange moment for me. Sad, because... omg! It was chocolate cake. But happy because, I just didn't want it. I haven't craved it again since. YAY! (sorry for the long reply! I'm wordy!)

simplywriting

Anyway on easter... a day which to me is 'the day of eating lots of chocolate in egg shapes', me and the other meat eaters where banned from eating meat for the whole day. Because apparently christians cant eat meat on easter. So not only was vegertarianism forced on me, but someones relgiion was forced on me!! I was so pissed i went to kfc!!

Are you sure it was Easter? There is no rule that you cannot eat meat on Easter. Christians (Some) refrain from Meat on Friday's during lent....
If it was Easter, that was a choice they made, not something that Christian's live by.

madijo41

Im a single mom trying to loose weight. I am the only one stocking the fridge and cupboards. I bring in only good food, but I drive him to a drive through every few weeks so he can have some take out, or to the corner store to buy a chip and pop. This way he wont feel deprived but still learn to eat properly.

dmkaiser83

My husband quit smoking and I'm a smoker. He gets a bit irritated when i smoke around him but he understands it was HIS choice. Food on the other hand is a different problem! I buy snack food for the kids, things for easy lunches on the weekends and whatnot, but he has a hard time keeping out of it. For me it's all about moderation. I believe you can eat anything as long as you don't go overboard, but I buy a pack of oreos and they are gone the first day!! he has asked me to stop buying snack food because it's just too hard for him to not eat it. well i'm not going to do it. I have a total chocolate addiction but i am still managing to leave the snacks alone!
i agree it's not fair to ask everyone around you to change just because YOU want to. it's all about teaching kids moderation, not starvation!

BigBoneSista

Well I'm not on the bandwagon with this. Sorry.

You would not bring drugs around a drug addict or alcohol around an alcoholic so why would someone that cares about you and your health bring your triggers around you when you are trying to make a change. Food addiction is a disease that people battle everyday. So yes in my household there is no junk food besides a unopened bag of Rolos thats been in the cabinet for over a month. If my kids want a snack they are allowed 1 pack of pretzel m&m's a week. I go out and get them 1 and they eat it right then. They are allowed to go to subway or get chinese food once a month. They split a sub or they spit the chinese combo. There are no left overs. Not because I wil be tempted, but just because I don't want junk in my home. But if I were to be one that could be tempted I would appreciate the fact that my kids are allowing mom to make the changes I did without grievances. My husband is deployed but he would be on the bandwagon as well.

On another note....Its called respect and if I respect you as my mate or my friend then I will look out for your best interest. PERIOD. I wouldn't try to sabotage your efforts.

Grokette

I agree with you but I also just left a post under one of the other topics about the other side of the coin. Yes, they shouldn't be forced to change their lifestyle because we made that decision but they also shouldn't be going out of their way to purposely sabotage us. I'm finding a lot of that with some of the members of my family and it only makes it harder to be successful at what we are trying to do.

I truly don't think that any one of our loved ones are going to the grocery with the intention of sabotaging the other person / people that are changing their lifestyle.

That goes back to the point that someone else mentioned. We need to live and let live. Let the other person / people make their own decisions. Just lead by example. They will eventually come around.

We are becoming to sensitive to the point where it is almost causing paranoia.

For example: "Like Oh my husband brought home oreos, he is trying to get me to stop losing weight. "

Just the sound of that sounds crazy.

BrownEyedG1rl

I agree with you completely. I have a husband and 2 children in my house too. I still buy junk food for them, but they also have been eating the healthy dinners that I have been cooking. Having junk in the house used to REALLY bother me cause I wanted to eat it, but it's not so bad now.

BrandNewMia

Well I'm not on the bandwagon with this. Sorry.

You would not bring drugs around a drug addict or alcohol around an alcoholic so why would someone that cares about you and your health bring your triggers around you when you are trying to make a change. Food addiction is a disease that people battle everyday. So yes in my household there is no junk food besides a unopened bag of Rolos thats been in the cabinet for over a month. If my kids want a snack they are allowed 1 pack of pretzel m&m's a week. I go out and get them 1 and they eat it right then. They are allowed to go to subway or get chinese food once a month. They split a sub or they spit the chinese combo. There are no left overs. Not because I wil be tempted, but just because I don't want junk in my home. But if I were to be one that could be tempted I would appreciate the fact that my kids are allowing mom to make the changes I did without grievances. My husband is deployed but he would be on the bandwagon as well.

On another note....Its called respect and if I respect you as my mate or my friend then I will look out for your best interest. PERIOD. I wouldn't try to sabotage your efforts.

I totally agree!

My children have a little candy stash in the pantry that I didn't get in to before, so that doesn't bother me. They are allowed to eat something from there a couple times a week. But as for their snacks and meals - I don't want them to struggle with weight the way I did, so they are eating healthier with me, and I don't feel guilty about it at all. My husband is out of the house 5 days a week - he can eat whatever he wants when he is not around me.

You are right - temptation is a major part of this battle. But I don't think it's too much to ask that my own home be as temptation-free as possible.

scagneti

Well I'm not on the bandwagon with this. Sorry.

You would not bring drugs around a drug addict or alcohol around an alcoholic so why would someone that cares about you and your health bring your triggers around you when you are trying to make a change. Food addiction is a disease that people battle everyday. So yes in my household there is no junk food besides a unopened bag of Rolos thats been in the cabinet for over a month. If my kids want a snack they are allowed 1 pack of pretzel m&m's a week. I go out and get them 1 and they eat it right then. They are allowed to go to subway or get chinese food once a month. They split a sub or they spit the chinese combo. There are no left overs. Not because I wil be tempted, but just because I don't want junk in my home. But if I were to be one that could be tempted I would appreciate the fact that my kids are allowing mom to make the changes I did without grievances. My husband is deployed but he would be on the bandwagon as well.

On another note....Its called respect and if I respect you as my mate or my friend then I will look out for your best interest. PERIOD. I wouldn't try to sabotage your efforts.

I agree with this. If my hubby wasn't interested in eating healithy, he could grab whatever he wanted for lunch and stop for some form of artery clogging greasy breakfast on his way to work. If he was an alcoholic, I wouldn't bring home a case of beer and drink it in front of him and if he had a gambling problem, I wouldn't drag him to Vegas even though I love Vegas (he'd be imposing his vacation needs on me!)

As for kids, they SHOULD be eating healthier (if they're not already). When their 18 they can make the choice to either remain eating healthy or go hog wild. What shouldn't happen is the parents fill a pantry full of sweets and chips and expect a child to make the smart decision.

mummum2

Well, my children are 21 (on Monday...7/2) and 13, both very, very outdoor types, into sports, creative drama etc. Anyhow we have always had snacks at home i.e. biscuits, crisps, both have a Friday treat (so not so much now as he's at university), be it Macdonalds, Pizza hut etc, etc, and I'm seriously not tempted to eat what's in the house, out at these eateries etc. My whole approach to this subject is, eat everything one wants but in moderation and move that body with some form of exercising, why should my family deprive themselves snacks because I CHOOSE TO LOSE A STONE AND HALF! :frown:

Kcham817

I did the exact same thing to my hubby when I started eating healthier. However he said oh no honey you're on your own. That's great you want to eat healthier but I want to enjoy the foods I like. It was hard for me, but each day it's getting easier to avoid those temptations.

foxyforce

Well I'm not on the bandwagon with this. Sorry.

You would not bring drugs around a drug addict or alcohol around an alcoholic so why would someone that cares about you and your health bring your triggers around you when you are trying to make a change. Food addiction is a disease that people battle everyday. So yes in my household there is no junk food besides a unopened bag of Rolos thats been in the cabinet for over a month. If my kids want a snack they are allowed 1 pack of pretzel m&m's a week. I go out and get them 1 and they eat it right then. They are allowed to go to subway or get chinese food once a month. They split a sub or they spit the chinese combo. There are no left overs. Not because I wil be tempted, but just because I don't want junk in my home. But if I were to be one that could be tempted I would appreciate the fact that my kids are allowing mom to make the changes I did without grievances. My husband is deployed but he would be on the bandwagon as well.

On another note....Its called respect and if I respect you as my mate or my friend then I will look out for your best interest. PERIOD. I wouldn't try to sabotage your efforts.

check your motives though, if you are only doing it for respect I don't thin that is the right reason.
If you are doing it because you don't want to destroy your children's health, that is different.

BrandNewMia

Well I'm not on the bandwagon with this. Sorry.

You would not bring drugs around a drug addict or alcohol around an alcoholic so why would someone that cares about you and your health bring your triggers around you when you are trying to make a change. Food addiction is a disease that people battle everyday. So yes in my household there is no junk food besides a unopened bag of Rolos thats been in the cabinet for over a month. If my kids want a snack they are allowed 1 pack of pretzel m&m's a week. I go out and get them 1 and they eat it right then. They are allowed to go to subway or get chinese food once a month. They split a sub or they spit the chinese combo. There are no left overs. Not because I wil be tempted, but just because I don't want junk in my home. But if I were to be one that could be tempted I would appreciate the fact that my kids are allowing mom to make the changes I did without grievances. My husband is deployed but he would be on the bandwagon as well.

On another note....Its called respect and if I respect you as my mate or my friend then I will look out for your best interest. PERIOD. I wouldn't try to sabotage your efforts.

check your motives though, if you are only doing it for respect I don't thin that is the right reason.
If you are doing it because you don't want to destroy your children's health, that is different.

loathesome, I think you misunderstood... She didn't say that she is losing weight and eating right to GAIN respect from her mate. It's that her mate should ALREADY respect her and her needs, like she would not sabatoge his efforts if the shoe was on the other foot. Her motives are totally in the right place already.

BigBoneSista

Well I'm not on the bandwagon with this. Sorry.

You would not bring drugs around a drug addict or alcohol around an alcoholic so why would someone that cares about you and your health bring your triggers around you when you are trying to make a change. Food addiction is a disease that people battle everyday. So yes in my household there is no junk food besides a unopened bag of Rolos thats been in the cabinet for over a month. If my kids want a snack they are allowed 1 pack of pretzel m&m's a week. I go out and get them 1 and they eat it right then. They are allowed to go to subway or get chinese food once a month. They split a sub or they spit the chinese combo. There are no left overs. Not because I wil be tempted, but just because I don't want junk in my home. But if I were to be one that could be tempted I would appreciate the fact that my kids are allowing mom to make the changes I did without grievances. My husband is deployed but he would be on the bandwagon as well.

On another note....Its called respect and if I respect you as my mate or my friend then I will look out for your best interest. PERIOD. I wouldn't try to sabotage your efforts.

check your motives though, if you are only doing it for respect I don't thin that is the right reason.
If you are doing it because you don't want to destroy your children's health, that is different.

I'mma need you to re-read what I said. Being respectful of others and their situation is being a good friend or mate. Where did I said I was trying to get respect from my kids? Thats a given as I'm their parent and have raise them that way. I'm doing what all parents should do. Leading by example and giving my children boundaries.

I don't have motives. I live drama free and what I give I get back in return.

foxyforce

Well I'm not on the bandwagon with this. Sorry.

You would not bring drugs around a drug addict or alcohol around an alcoholic so why would someone that cares about you and your health bring your triggers around you when you are trying to make a change. Food addiction is a disease that people battle everyday. So yes in my household there is no junk food besides a unopened bag of Rolos thats been in the cabinet for over a month. If my kids want a snack they are allowed 1 pack of pretzel m&m's a week. I go out and get them 1 and they eat it right then. They are allowed to go to subway or get chinese food once a month. They split a sub or they spit the chinese combo. There are no left overs. Not because I wil be tempted, but just because I don't want junk in my home. But if I were to be one that could be tempted I would appreciate the fact that my kids are allowing mom to make the changes I did without grievances. My husband is deployed but he would be on the bandwagon as well.

On another note....Its called respect and if I respect you as my mate or my friend then I will look out for your best interest. PERIOD. I wouldn't try to sabotage your efforts.

check your motives though, if you are only doing it for respect I don't thin that is the right reason.
If you are doing it because you don't want to destroy your children's health, that is different.

loathesome, I think you misunderstood... She didn't say that she is losing weight and eating right to GAIN respect from her mate. It's that her mate should ALREADY respect her and her needs, like she would not sabatoge his efforts if the shoe was on the other foot. Her motives are totally in the right place already.

9
again my statement is in place, the op is about it not being fair to push our beliefs on and lifestyles on others (in a nutshell). in summary, she said "its called respect" and how she would respect her mate or friends and their best interests. But that has little to do with looking out for their health, it is looking out for your interests, and not theirs. My statement holds merit.