Hitting a Wall

Debtappe

I've been on MFP since September and lost 10 pounds. I have 32 more to go. This last couple of weeks things have been falling apart diet wise. I think it is my emotional state. My whole identity is that of a fat person. It is how I think of myself; it's how I always think of myself. Even back when I was thin I thought of myself as a fat person. I think this identity issue may be getting in the way of my weight loss effort. I think I am sabotaging myself because I literally won't allow myself to be thin. I have no idea how to be a thin person in this world. Any thoughts or advice?

Bethanybu

I am reading an autobiography: Passing For thin-Loosing half my Weight and finding myself. It touches on exactly what you are talking about. Recently instead of focusing on weight loss I've been trying to set fitness & health goals. Focus on making healthy changes and goals: drink more water, eat 5 servings of fruit & veggies, exercise. Stay off the scale too. Also, I don't know if you are religious, but it helps me to remember God loves me as i am thin or fat. If you have children you know they love you in that same way--try to unconditionally love yourself as well as you journey to be healthier. Wishing you success.

PLUMSGRL

:flowerforyou: Hey Hon,

Kinda sounds like you might have some issues to work out with a professional.

I've had the same mentality in the past, and still need to kick myself in the butt occasionally. I've dropped quite a bit of weight so far, so I look a lot better today than I did 8 months ago. As a result, I seem to have to deal with more social contact, and I'm more of a homebody. I also have to put up with comments from various people about my weight loss, how I did it, and "oh, you don't need to loose any more!" (I'm still in the obese catagory). Most people who see us making the effort to get healthy, try to sabotage us in one form or another and we all have the habit of trying to please others before taking care of ourselves. From time to time we get tired of having to watch what we put in our mouths when others don't, and the exercise (even if we feel great after doing it)~somedays we do it grudgingly if at all because life gets in the way (so we tell ourselves) and we would rather do something else.

But really~ once we loose the weight, why do we (and society) feel we need to change into someone else? Why can't we be just a better version of ourselves? Lighter, healther, better. As you can tell, I still have issues. It took about a 50 pound drop before I realized I needed to get smaller clothes. I compaired the sizes 18W, tried on 16W (too big), 14 (too big), 12?????? Yep they fit just fine. I put the two sizes next to each other and looked. OMG. Then I looked in the mirror and saw me. I'm smaller, but naked I can tell I've still got to get more of the goo gone. But still, I see that I've got a lot of good parts.

It's taken me a very long time to come to this realization, lots of yo-yo dieting, and a good 10 years of fat and unhappy.

Not everyone can look inside themselves and "pull themselves up by their bootstraps" ~ talk to you doctor, chaplin, womens group~ but do go to see a professional to discover what's holding you back...

Best wishes and good luck on your journey!:flowerforyou:

Phitommer

First of all - your pic is so cute!! :-)

10 pounds since Sept! That is great! Especially when you consider the holidays that we had between Sept and now. The very first thing you need to do is love the body you have now (you don't need to love your weight, just yourself!) You need to accept and embrace it! Then tell yourself that since you love yourself and who are, you will work on being better in every way. One of those goals should be to be healtheir and more fit. I know this is easier said than done. But buy yourself some cute clothes and have fun wearing them.

Stay positive! You will have set backs. Everyone does. The next thing you need to do is accept that if you want to make a change and lose weight, that you have to make CHANGES. Set a monthly goal to workout 10 times, or whatever will be the next step for you. Increase that # each month. Also, plan ahead. Plan your meals for the week. This will help from having too many calories in the day.

You can do it!!