Wanna Be

stephilderton

So, when I was in high school (94-98) I was a runner. Today, I weigh 340ish pounds. There is a story in between those two times.

During my senior year, I began gaining weight at a dramatic pace, having no explanation for it. I gained around 100 pounds by the time I began my freshman year in college. Of course, I've gained about 100 more since then. After years of depression and hopelessness, I was diagnosed with PCOS in 2008. The diagnosis gave me a new enthusiasm and excitement, and spurred me to hire a personal trainer.

Between February 2008 and November 2008, when I completed a 5k for the first time since 1998, I lost approximately 80 pounds. EIGHTY. POUNDS. As I write this to you, I have no idea how to explain to you why that was not encouragement enough to continue. I've gained every pound back, but my mind is always on how great it would be to be a runner again...

Yes, I know the obvious answer. Just do it. Get off your *kitten* and begin a walking plan. Then move up to a walk-jog plan. And then be a runner. I'm not sure if it is a mental block or if this is just an impossible pipe dream I've got.

All of this, and I admit... I'm such a wanna be. I read Runners World. I LOVE John Bingham, and I'm totally inspired by his story. I sincerely MISS the runners' high. I would even suffer through shin splints again to have that back.

I'm not sure why I'm sharing all of this... I guess to just be honest for half a second of my life.

luv2ash

We appreciate your honesty! Start out trying many other forms of exercse videos out there to help shed the weight and focus on the running as an end goal, or a reward for the weight loss.

Check out my website---I am on a wonderful program that helped me lose 77 pounds in 5 monnths!.

Raebug123

Its great that you are being honest with yourself and with the world, both are really hard. You will find all kinds of support here and make yourself become a runner again. Good Luck in your journey!!!!

warmachinejt

We gotta work hard for our goals! I want to have a lower body fat% and gain about 30 lbs of muscle. That will take me about 2 or 3 years even more! You obviously can't just start running again. Maybe try stationary biking first and then start doing brisk walks. Just put your effort into it and you will get to where you want.

msbanana

I wish I had room to add another friend (I've reached my limit). I just want to say, You can do it.

I have PCOS too, I hate to say it this way but for a long while I used it as an excuse to gain weight and stay heavy. It's possible to lose it- you've done it. Make the choice to do it again. If you believe that you can you will. I ran my first 5K since college last summer. I have a 12K and two 5K mud runs planned for this summer. If you want it badly enough, get it. You've made a great start coming here. Good luck to you- I'll keep my eyes peeled for you forum post about your first race. :flowerforyou:

kappyblu

Your honesty is so great. This place is all about facing our demons and changing our lives. We also get to meet some great people along the way.

I'm not ready for running yet, either. I don't know what it even feels like to get that "runners high" as you so eloquently put it. I will get there some day. I do the "walk away the pounds" dvds by Leslie Sansone. She's so great!! You do all of this at home, and you really work up a sweat. The great thing is that you can do it no matter the weather outside.

I wish you the best of luck in your journey and maybe you can give me running tips when we both get to that point someday in the future, ok? :flowerforyou:

Anijan

Stay hopeful dear, try to figure out what is your mental blocker, why are you holding back. You deserve the best, you are beautiful!!! Dig deep in your mind, get past those issues first, and you will leave the weight in your tracks as you cross the finish line. Best of luck hun.