Back Again For The First Time

SiddiQ815

I got so frustrated and twisted up the last time I was here that I decided to erase and start all over again! I deleted my old account, reweighed myself and came up with new goals and I am in attack mode with a whole new attitude toward losing this weight! I have a great support system and I am much more optimistic and I am ready to put forth a more sincere effort this go around. I need this so badly for so many reasons but I had no idea how hard it could be. A hard day or a sad story from a good friend can cause me to make decisions that ultimately result in my demise. I am embarrassed not because of how I look but because of how I have allowed food to control whether I live or die. It should be simple eat = live; don't eat = don't live but as I'm sure you know it's just not that cut and dry for "us". I wanna go to an amusement park without being terrified that after waiting in an hour long line i will reach the summit and be turned away because the safety restraints don't fit me. The idea of that "walk of shame" back to the bottom of that line is the stuff nightmares are built upon. So this is a beginning again for me. A brand new second shot. I'm going to pretend as though the first time NEVER even happened. Looking for help and USEFUL information PLEASE don't request to be my "friend" just to see what I've been eating all day! (LOL) I had sum really great "friends" here before I hope to hav them back and some new ones as well!

loseit4ever

Welcome...and welcome back!! I know how you feel about the "eat=live" thing. My quote in my profile is "Eat to live, don't live to eat!" I would be glad to help support you. And I don't usually look at people's diaries very often...lol! Good luck. Sending a friend request your way.

flbeachbuddy

Remember, trying and not succeeding is not failing! I am glad you are back.

I stopped posting for a while and don't post my meals every day but find that it helps me realize what I am eating and what it costs me. I am trying a new method - eating well, but once a day having something I really LIKE. Just a smaller portion of it. I am losing more slowly, but I feel that it will stay off this time.

I do understand the feeling awful. But I now try to appreciate what I do have and use it. I can walk, so I try to do that more often. I do find that watching TV is bad for me - not busy enough, so I think I am hungry. So, I try to do something while watching...

And, btw, you can hide your food, etc., from people/friends if you want. I have a password so that I can allow someone to see them if I want to be accountable.

I was going to say good luck, but luck has nothing to do with it. Good Work! And enjoy your life. It helps the awful feeling.

SiddiQ815

GOOD WORK! >>I Like that!