just ranting...

princessmedic

I am frustrated and just needed to vent! I have lost almost 50lbs, I cut off all my hair and colored it for a new look and no one has even noticed. I am only a size smaller than I started...I'm 4'11" and every pound shows. I have stalled out on losing, and now began cheating to make myself feel better-not that it works! I just need to exercise more but I make every excuse not to. I am a single mom of three kids...all girls. I work weekend nights, so my eating schedule is hectic and weird. My job is a 12 hour shift in dispatch so its sedentary and no breaks to get up and move. During the week I take my kids and their friends to their sports practices, and try to spend some quality time with them since I don't see them all weekend, and lately we've been eating on the fly so I end up with McDonalds or some other fast food. I need a little motivation!!!! UGH

LOVEthighSELF

I did not write this--- love it though.
Let’s assume you go out and buy two rolls of paper towels, each with only 84 paper towels on it (one for each day of the challenge). You put one aside, and keep it for future reference (your “before” picture). The other one represents you (I’ll call your paper towel you “Ed”). The core represents the lean Ed. The towels represent the fat that is covering the lean Ed. For sake of argument, let’s say that Ed wants to lose 21 pounds of fat, so (84/21) each sheet represents a quarter-pound of fat lost. Let’s also assume that Ed loses his fat equally during each day of the challenge.

Each day during the first week, you tear a sheet off of Ed, representing the fat he has lost for the day. Next, you put Ed next to the full roll (“Big Al”) for comparison. No noticeable difference!!! Even at the end of the week! This can’t be working for me!

But, being a good Ed, you continue to follow Body-for-LIFE. At the end of weeks two and three, you continue to compare Ed to Big Al, and still notice very little difference. That stinkin’ Bill Phillips MUST be a liar!

But Ed is determined! He works hard! Hitting his 10’s…eating his 6 daily meals. Three more weeks go by, the sheets peeling off day after day, before Ed gets up the courage to stand next to Big Al again. Holy Myoplex! Ed is skinny! OK, not skinny, but less huge!!!

By the end of the 12-week Body-for-LIFE program, Ed is down to his lean dream, or somewhere near it. Ed is happy. We are happy. Big Al – well he’s not so happy.

The lesson to be learned is that fat, like paper towels, comes off in sheets. When you are heavy, you are big around. And when you are big around, that fat is spread over a MUCH larger area – just like that outside towel sheet. The closer you get to the lean you, the more each lost pound of fat shows, because it is spread over a smaller area.

While the outside sheet may only cover 1 layer of the roll, the inside sheet may go around 4 times. That last sheet looks like it gives you 4 times the results of the first sheet, but in reality, the results are the same – your perception is just different! And you’ll never see the inside, if you aren’t patient while the outside is coming off! - Bob White

caitlinclock

First of all, wow, you have done such a great job so far and you should be so proud of yourself! I'm sorry that you haven't found any support around you or received any compliments from people you see. Is it possible that they feel awkward to say something or they think you might be sensitive to the topic? I have had people think that of me and not say anything because of those kinds of reasons. Just know that you are doing such a fabulous job and remember you're doing it for YOU!!

I am not a mother but I know that growing up I rarely showed much gratitude or took much notice to things in my mother's personal life. Now when I look back I see them, though. I know when your kids are older they will look back at what you are doing and they will be so proud of you. Maybe it will even motivate them to do great things in their own lives. Don't give up! You can do it!

jb83

Frustration was probably one the the driving factors that helped you lose the 1st 50 lbs! Use that frustration now to make the changes you need to. You know what you have to do.... now get to doing it!!!!

BTW, I like your hair!

BryanAir

I look at stalls this way. Even when the scale isn't moving down, it isn't moving up like it did in the past. Keep up the healthy living and you will keep losing weight.

melodyg

Identifying here! I do like the analogy that the first person responding to your post said. I know that at over 30 pounds lost I have only had a couple of people ask if I am losing weight. I am about one size lower too (I think, I haven't tried on new clothes lately but the old ones are looser!)

I know it is so, so frustrating. I just have to keep reminding myself that if I quit I will never get to be the size I want to be. Sending you a friend request so we can motivate each other!

princessmedic

I think because I work in a predominately male environment maybe they don't want to say anything...who wants to ask about weight? But, its hard to not know if there's a difference. And I asked my friend (again a male) if he could tell since he hadn't seen me in a few months, and he said...nope, guess you'll have to lose 50 more! It was not the answer I had been hoping for. AND I asked another friend (another darn male) about my hair-and he said, well the color is ok but its too short. Women should have long hair. Again, not the answer I was going for.

fitnesspirateninja

I would be frustrated, too. Is there some way that you can recognize your own accomplishments? Do you have mini-goals with rewards? I set a couple of "new clothes" rewards, and that's when I really noticed a difference with my weight loss. It reminded me why I'm doing this - I want to feel better, look good, and be able to wear cute clothes.

When I had a slip up during the holidays, I revised my profile. It's good to look at your reasons for doing this, and think about what inspires you.

Do you have anyone who can be your support network outside or MFP? It might help to have a friendly person to talk to on the phone or in person when you're feeling stressed out about this stuff.

You've done so well already! Keep up the good work!

princessmedic

I really didn't set mini goals...I wasn't sure what to expect out of myself. Since I was feeling low-and had stalled out, I thought rewarding myself with my new hair would be a great idea. I spent WAY more than I thought I would, since I am usually a cheapy haircut place...and I splurged and went to a real salon. I felt really good about it til two people I saw right after said it was too short and I should have left it alone. I really do this on my own. My best friend always encourages me to give in and have whatever it is I am craving. I tried keeping up with my primary care doctor-I brought in a printed copy of my food diary and she went over it and criticized every entry. Weird, I know. It was like the weight I had lost meant nothing since I didn't eat what she thought I should be.

bettertracie

Ok girlie... So If you pay attention to those guys at work (as far as the crap they talk to each other about... guy stuff) as much as you wish they'd casually notice your progress...

You already know... They're just not that observant!!

I work with an all male crew where I am and my guys didnt start to notie until I lost 60 or so; and in my work environment I totally get to talk to people about what I'm doing everyday!! I work for a sports apparel retailer, and wear shorts all year round... The guys finally started to ask questions when I started MFP because I was more energized, confident, and ready to just do it for me! Which is why we all do this, right? RIGHT??

Anyhoo, of course all our stories are different, and I was and always will be outspoken and able to tell it how I think it is and gladly help you realize why it is that way... And when I had lost that much weight, I was so happy, I'd find a way to make it a part of the conversation! I guess the moral here, BE PROUD FOR YOU OF HOW FAR YOU'VE COME!!! LET THAT MOTIVATE YOU TO KEEP IT UP!!

Boys will always be boys, so good luck!!

sojournero

Give yourself a break! You are SUPER WOMAN!... you lost 50 and you are parenting your children. Sometimes i think we need to have our moments and then get back on the horse. As for no one noticing, i think its more important that you know. It is hard for women to provide self care because they are taking care of everyone else. I love that you changed your hair and lost 50. Now find some time to go to the hot tub or get a message... or at the very least, be gentle with yourself