Scared

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By no means am I anywhere near to being thin yet, but when I try to imagine myself thin I can't. I am now down to the same weight I was in highschool. I have been overweight for as long as I could remember. I am scared of how I will look. I am scared at how I will feel when people look at me. Already people are just so amazed at my transformation. People are always saying how good I am looking now but I always thought I looked good I just did not feel good. Now I feel healthy and scared because I dont know what to say or how to act when people say these things to me. I think in the back of my mind what the hell did you people think of me before I lost over 30 lbs.

Replies

  • JennyBanker
    JennyBanker Posts: 49 Member
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    By no means am I anywhere near to being thin yet, but when I try to imagine myself thin I can't. I am now down to the same weight I was in highschool. I have been overweight for as long as I could remember. I am scared of how I will look. I am scared at how I will feel when people look at me. Already people are just so amazed at my transformation. People are always saying how good I am looking now but I always thought I looked good I just did not feel good. Now I feel healthy and scared because I dont know what to say or how to act when people say these things to me. I think in the back of my mind what the hell did you people think of me before I lost over 30 lbs.
  • GinaB30
    GinaB30 Posts: 725 Member
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    They probably thought you looked pretty and everything, but maybe they worried for your health and to now see you LOOKING so much better and healthier, they are probably just amazed and happy for you!
    =o)
    Take the compliments with pride, say "Thank you!" and smile because you're making yourself better every day =o)
  • lotusfromthemud
    lotusfromthemud Posts: 5,335 Member
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    This "fear" is something that is very rarely talked about.

    Your body will be different after you lose the weight, and people will treat you differently. Here are some things I've noticed:

    When I'm shopping, I get better service. I get more attention from people who find me attractive (this is very difficult for me) I have no idea how to dress my new body (I'm learning. . .slowly). In general, I am all of a sudden more "visible" to others. (it's a strange truth that heavy people are invisible to others, even though they take up more space) I think part of this is I conduct myself differently, with more confidence and outgoing, but part of this is how people think about others.

    Things I've found that help me are: reminding myself that I'm still the same (or at least a very similar) person to the person I was when I was heavier. Spend some time looking at (but not judging) your new body. I've taken up dancing and yoga, both things involve looking at your body a lot in the mirror. Or, you can just look at yourself in a mirror. (the eyes will stay the same, so focus there) Another thing is to physically get in touch with your new body. I actually read in a book to moisturize after a shower, so that you're aware of the surface area of your body. (hey, my skin is always smooth now, so that's a benefit). I am now trying to lose the last little bit of weight, and I think that "the fear" is what prevents me from reaching this ultimate goal. (I specialize in self-sabotage. . .a flaw I'm working on.)

    When people pay you a complement, accept it as just that. Say "thank you", and try not to question their motives, or worry about what they thought about you before. "Before" is just that. . .the past. . don't live in it.
  • ecabrera
    ecabrera Posts: 24 Member
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    Try not to worry about what people thought about you "before" just accept that people realize that you are taking care of yourself, getting healthier and setting an example for others. Sometimes when we are overweight most of our lives, we are worried deep inside that we won't recognize ourselves. We never met the thinner versions of ourselves. I know being overweight felt like protection to me. Congratulations on the weight loss. Say "Thank You" and feel proud of your accomplishment.
  • vldowd
    vldowd Posts: 74 Member
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    I can sooooo relate to how you are feeling. I have another 75 lbs to go just to get me into the healthy range. :grumble: To this point I have lost 30 lbs and am surprised by the changes in my body. I cannot envision what will be left after I get to a healthy level. :noway: I think I'm going to try and remember viviakay's advise.

    We just have to remember that these are wonderful changes and that we are the same people inside, despite what the outside looks like.
  • briblue72
    briblue72 Posts: 672 Member
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    I know what you mean. Celebrate, sister!! 30 pounds is amazing! I have found that I enjoy shopping much more than I used to. I love that I fit into sizes at ALL stores, not just some.

    I'm actually worried that I won't be satisfied with my goal weight. It seems like other people see a much bigger difference in me than I see in myself. I like how viviakay said to look at your new body without judging it. Part of my problem is that I see so much room for improvement and I don't spend enough time being proud of the changes that have already happened.

    Feel proud of what you've done, and take the compliments as other people being proud of you, too! :flowerforyou: