Isn't family supposed to support you?

Diem30

This past summer I went to visit my sister in Portugal and while we were there we celebrated my Nephews Baptism. Well I had just finished my first year of University and had put on my fair share of the freshman 15. I was feeling really sucky as it was when at the Baptism my godmother's husbad wanted to pass and to do that I had to push my chair into the table, well instead of being polite and asking me to move he grabbed my chair and roughly shoved me into the table where I spilled red wine on my very expensive white sundress and said loud enough for the rest of the group (of about 50) to hear (and this is a quote) "Jesus Christ don't they have gyms in Canada" I was humilitated and embarrassed beyond belief my saving grace was my cousin Daniel who told him to F off and quickly ushered me outside. I was so mortified and couldn't even bring myself to go back into the venue.

Isn't family supposed to support you not humiliate you?

Sorry for the sob story but I was wondering if anyone else out there knows what I'm talking about, how are you supposed to succed when those close to you are tearing you down?

jacquejl

Unfortunately, some people need to humiliate others in order to feel better about themselves. What an aweful thing to say! It sounds like your cousin is supportive and thank goodness you have him.

Best of luck to you!

mandijo

I'm so sorry you had to experience that. We've all had some humiliating story about someone not using a filter when they are talking about our weight. It's worse when it's family. I would say that if I were you, I'd remind myself that you aren't losing weight for him. You are losing weight for you. Prove that ***hole wrong and do this. People who act that way don't DESERVE to be in your life. Some people just aren't worth it, and as hard as it is to say "see you later", he sounds like he needs to be kicked to the curb! Don't let his ignorance spoil your success!

ready_for_a_change

Yes they are "supposed" to support you. But this is not always the case. Use this as fuel to be more healthy, thats what I am trying to do. The fat jokes and "big guy" labels have gotten old. They come mostly from family and "friends". Strangers normally do not insult you to your face. Hang in there and come here for support and encouragement!

sarahnicolexoxo

I know exactly what you're going through. They put you down because they are insecure about themselves. Its the only way to make them feel better. Keep your head up *hugs*

crazycatgirl84

I hear ya.. Support is never there when you need it. But if you would have called urself fat then they would have been like OKMG your not fat your perfect. I get that all the time and I am like umm I am like 60 pounds over weight. Which no isnt bad compared to some people but for me its hard because i am a small person and 60 pounds extra is alot of work on the heart. So I can truly relate..

SeattleLady

That is so awful. I too was abused most by those closest to me who thought they were "helping" me. You will be ready when you are ready and need to surround yourself with support. Overeating is a chronic problem in the US, in our family, in our culture, and in our humanity. There is nothing wrong with going through the necessary process to find health and happiness in being healthy. But no one can expect you to be successful if you are bullied into it.

Blessings to you,

R

sarahliftsUP

I would have been absolutely horrified. It's pretty hard to avoid the freshmen 15.. I avoided it though.. yeah, I got the freshmen 20 instead!

It does suck when the people around you aren't being supportive. But at least you have people here on MFP to support you. And we are all in the same boat so we can relate to what you are going through and are able to support and encourage one another.

I would definitely use his comment to my advantage. Think about it when you are working out to push through it. Then next time you see him and he has any questions about gyms in Canada you can just smirk can say, "Don't worry aboot it!" :oP

jenbusick

He was covering. He knew when he spilled the wine down the front of your dress that he'd been a jerk, and everyone would know it, and calling negative attention to you was his way of trying to deflect it from himself.

But knowing that it's his problem, not yours (regardless what you weigh) doesn't take all the sting out of it. I'm sorry, what a terrible thing!

Diem30

Thanks so much for all your guys's support who needs negative family when you have positive people like you all on MFP.