Jealousy From Friends?

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  • pinkgigi
    pinkgigi Posts: 693 Member
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    I don't talk to any of my friends about my weight loss, this is because I have been on the other end of people who are losing weight talking endlessly about it, and I found it incredibly boring when I was not in that head space myself. I do however talk about fitness with other people into it like me, but not the weight loss.

    My children don't want to be bothered with it either, so I look to places like this for support and encouragement (I'm a widow so now spousal support either).

    I agree with what people say about 'weeding the garden', but maybe you just don't need to be talking to them about it? Just an alternative view, do with it what you will.

    GG
  • SKP1986
    SKP1986 Posts: 392 Member
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    I've found recently that some of the people I thought would be supportive aren't really. I don't know if it is jealousy or not, but I have a couple friends in particular that could be grouped in the "know-it-all" section that I have talked to about my weight loss plans. I've gone on a low carb, low sugar diet because of my dietary needs (Insulin Resistance). When talking to these friends, I get the response "Well I think you just need to watch what you eat and have a smaller portion size." The worst part is that these are friends I haven't seen IN PERSON for months. They have no idea what I am doing or how much I am eating or anything else. They don't know my dietary needs or anything of that matter.

    The thing is, people are always going to gossip and always going to try and talk about what other people are doing "wrong" in their lives. Honestly, I would sit everyone down and let them know that you know what's been going on. Ask them if they have a problem and tell them that this is difficult enough for you without their lack of support. If anyone does have a problem the least they could do is bring it to you instead of gossiping behind your back. Weight loss is hard for anyone, whether you need to lose 2 pounds or 200. As long as you are doing it in a healthy way and staying at a healthy weight in the end, then it really isn't their place to say anything about it.
  • Calidaho
    Calidaho Posts: 110 Member
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    When I lost a huge amount of weight a few years ago (gained most of it back for a complicated reason), I got a weird vibe from some relatives. They couldn't believe that I was losing weight by eating healthfully and without a gimmick. "Can you eat ____?" "I can eat whatever I want as long as I keep things in balance." Some of them sit on the surgery excuse--"If I could only get bypass/lap band surgery, I could lose weight." I did it without anything like that (not that it isn't right for some people, it just shouldn't be an excuse to pile on the mayo) and I think it made them feel bad about themselves.

    Now that I am back on the track to being healthy, I am anticipating more weirdness.

    Surround yourself with supportive friends. You don't have to ditch the non-supportive friends but just let their comments roll off your back. They may fear your judgement because they might not be living as healthfully. You just be your same self, only healthier. And DON'T be guilted into eating poorly! Keep up the good work!
  • kaitlyn12osu
    kaitlyn12osu Posts: 26
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    I had the same exact thing happen to me. I lost 42 lbs while my roommates watched last year! Honestly, I don't want to be discouraging but there was nothing I could do about it but make new friends and branch out. You really find out who your true friends are because a few people are and were totally supportive, but I don't speak to any of my roommates from last year and I attribute it to them being jealous (it took me awhile to even think of how someone would be jealous of me! But I think that's what happened).

    If they can't support you and be happy for you, then they aren't your true friends! True friends are excited for you through the whole process :)
  • Scorpioangel
    Scorpioangel Posts: 951 Member
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    Yep! I have experienced people not being supportive and acting as if nothing is going on even though it's obvious I have lost a good amount of weight on my frame. People are really rude at times and it's sad that people can't support someone who is getting healthier I mean really?! Keep your head up and keep up with the good work!

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