I'm struggling...

sweetlauri70

I've been at this two months...it's the longest I've ever stuck with a diet and the most weight I've ever lost. I have one good friend who is an incredible support and encouragement for me (she just lost 100 pounds)...but the initial encouragement, and support from the rest of those around me is kind of disappearing. My husband still eats junk food...like the trip to the hostess store last week where he bought $30 in crap! When I try to make something healthy, nobody wants to eat it...and if I cook "normal food" I have a hard time not wanting to eat it.

I have been strong though...turning down ALL of the unhealthy choices...sticking to my 1200 calories a day...avoiding eating out (because half of the time, I don't know the nutrition information on what's being served).

But I'm beginning to feel defeated. I've been crying for days. I gave in this weekend and ate "normal" not an excessive amount of calories (maybe 2,000 a day...and according to this website, without excercise, my body needs 2900 to maintain my cow status). Technically, even at 2,000 I should lose something...but over the weekend I didn't stick to the plan and I gained 22 pounds!

I feel completely distraught over this. My mind knows that I didn't consume 80,000 calories to justify a true weight gain like that, but I can't get over it. I feel like giving up and just resigining myself that I will always be this size. I'm supposed to go to the doctor next week and I weigh 13 pounds more than I did three weeks ago when I went. I don't want that kind of failure....and when I feel down, I want to eat. I'm at work and there are no healthy choices here...snickers and butterfingers, cupcakes, pies...

I'm fighting this feeling...I just don't know how long I can hold out.

sweetlauri70

I've been at this two months...it's the longest I've ever stuck with a diet and the most weight I've ever lost. I have one good friend who is an incredible support and encouragement for me (she just lost 100 pounds)...but the initial encouragement, and support from the rest of those around me is kind of disappearing. My husband still eats junk food...like the trip to the hostess store last week where he bought $30 in crap! When I try to make something healthy, nobody wants to eat it...and if I cook "normal food" I have a hard time not wanting to eat it.

I have been strong though...turning down ALL of the unhealthy choices...sticking to my 1200 calories a day...avoiding eating out (because half of the time, I don't know the nutrition information on what's being served).

But I'm beginning to feel defeated. I've been crying for days. I gave in this weekend and ate "normal" not an excessive amount of calories (maybe 2,000 a day...and according to this website, without excercise, my body needs 2900 to maintain my cow status). Technically, even at 2,000 I should lose something...but over the weekend I didn't stick to the plan and I gained 22 pounds!

I feel completely distraught over this. My mind knows that I didn't consume 80,000 calories to justify a true weight gain like that, but I can't get over it. I feel like giving up and just resigining myself that I will always be this size. I'm supposed to go to the doctor next week and I weigh 13 pounds more than I did three weeks ago when I went. I don't want that kind of failure....and when I feel down, I want to eat. I'm at work and there are no healthy choices here...snickers and butterfingers, cupcakes, pies...

I'm fighting this feeling...I just don't know how long I can hold out.

jollygirl

GIrl, just stick to it. Have a "normal weekend" like you said but dont try to eat more then you normally do. Just watch your intake. You do this for yourself and for your kids. Its not a diet its a lifestyle change and there is alot of out there right with ya! Its all about being healthy if you weigh 200 or 100 as long as you are healthy

Benson

You can hold out forever!! This horrible gain will disappear as quickly as it came. Even if you lose a lb or two a week you will be 52-104 lbs lighter next July 9th!! Talk it out and work it out You are worth it. Nothing of value comes easy. I have been having a terrible time but I will persevere and I will win!! We can do this healthy eating thing. Let's prove it!!

mechanicmom

This is just my personal opinion: I don't think you are eating enough. 1200 calories in the bare minimum. You should be eating at least what your BMR is. You are starving yourself. So when you did eat more, your body is holding on to those calories because it's thinking you are going to start starving it again. Eat at least your BMR and give it a couple of weeks. It will take a while for your body to get out of starvation mode. I think a lot of people here will agree with me. I quit losing weight after eating 1200 calories a day for a month or two and someone on here told me to up my calorie intake. I did, and I also upped my exercise. After 2 weeks I dropped 3 pounds in a matter of four days! I wasn't eating enough. I can't emphasize that enough: you need to eat more than 1200 cals. I think it's okay for jumpstarting weight loss, but not for a long period of time. Again this is just my opinion.
Melissa:flowerforyou:

ChubbyBunny

Maybe the food had higher salt content in it, which could be causing a water retention issue. Happens to me all the time.

It sucks that your support system is deteriorating. Are you the main cook in the house? I say either they eat what you make or they make their own food. There have been times I've had to cook my own meal and the others had to cook their food. Easy, nope.....budget friendly...NO! However, this seems important to you and if it truly is then it's worth it. Those around you will have to adjust.

Walk away from the bad foods. I am totally an emotional eater too. I've had to get my "treats" in 100 calorie size. I also keep them in the freezer which takes a lot of the fun out of them. For stress times maybe stock your desk with healthy snacks that will keep.

You can do this.

MFS27

Listen to your inner voice of logic - you are right - there is no way you gained 22 pounds of fat in a weekend. Water - maybe (esp if you ate salty foods, etc.) But water weight comes and goes quickly.

What I found works for me is not to focus on how long it will take me to lose weight - but just focus on this day, or this hour. Tell yourself: "For this hour, I will eat healthy" and "For this day I will walk 10 minutes", etc.

I got rid of all the junk food - I buy all the gorceries, so I just don't buy any junk. I make dinner, and the family eats what is on the table, or they can make themselves a sandwich. The rule is they must try everything on the plate - and slowly, they are learning to like some of my "rabbit food" :laugh:

For exercise motivation - get a pedometer and see how far you walk in a day. Then try to beat that number each day (even if it is just a couple of steps).

You CAN do it! :flowerforyou:

sarolyna

You gained 22 pounds over one weekend? That is not humanly possible. So either your scale was off before the weekend, showing you as much too light, or after the weekend it has gotten off and showed you as much too heavy. Did you change scales, drop it, move it, etc? You just can't gain 10 pounds a day, no matter if your body is in starvation mode or not.

kerrilucko

I have to agree, for your weight, 1200 calories is very low. I'm on 1200 cals but I weigh 181 right now... I think you may need more food..
My thoughts on your situation are: It sounds like in your family, you are the cook right? well if that is the case your family doesn't have a say in what they eat. If you prepare something healthy the kids will either eat it or go hungry. If they go hungry, put their plates in the fridge until they decide they're ready to eat it. If your husband doesn't want to eat it you can't force him to... but seriously, if he wants your kids to grow up healthy and happy and to be a good influence on them he WILL eat what you prepare. There's nothing wrong with having a treat now and then but they NEED their nutrients and so does he. That said, there's also nothing wrong with you having a treat occasionally. Just make it one you can live with. They have AMAZING dessert flavoured yogurts out now, and a wide variety of 100 cal sweet snacks. And of course, a fresh fruit salad served over a little light sorbet is a yummy treat that won't leave you guilty. You and hubby just really need to exchange a few choice words. If he wants you to keep losing weight and becoming healthy, he is going to have to be more supportive. You're doing it for you... yes, but you're also doing this for your family, and he needs to give up his bad habits for the sake of his family as well. good luck :flowerforyou:

MrsSorenson

Get a new scale because that can't be possible to gain 22 lbs over the weekend. Even if you pigged out!

Forget the number and just eat right. If you have to weight every other week do that!

I became a slave to the scale and being an emotional eater, I would fall off. So stay positive, you have already done an amazing job!

Jess

natalie424

You CAN do this, Lauri! It is a struggle sometimes, especially when everyone in the house isn't on board with the healthy eating. Just keep your fridge and pantry stocked with healthy foods for yourself. Pack some healthy snacks to take to work as well.

I agree with some previous posts that you might need to increase your calories a little. Your body may be telling you that you need more, otherwise it will store those calories. Are you eating your exercise calories? I've read several posts about how important it is to eat those calories.

We are all here to support you! You can achieve your goals... just take it one day at a time!

Lavendersunday

Hi Lauri,

What I didn't hear in your reflection was anything about exercise.

Exercise ...any kind you like...even just going for a walk will help you deal with all of this.

Walk away your frustration even if it shakes up the family schedule a bit.

You will be a happier, healthy wife and mom because it will trigger feel good hormones in you.

Don't internalize the problems or actions of others...only YOUR reaction counts...
the rest of the family will follow once they see how great you look and feel.

It's that easy!!

~Namaste :flowerforyou:

kjllose

Sweet lauri70 don't give up, you are doing good. I have family that doesn't want to eat healthy either. But when I make them hamburgers for instance, I have just gotten used to making mine a turkey burger. Not all food has to be "diet food". There are lots of food that are tasty and not all that fattening. One I use that my family likes is chicken taco salad. We like taco's. Maybe yours would too. I use chicken breast cut up or turkey burger cook it with taco seasoning. Serve with tostitos instead of a taco pile it all with salad and salsa and sour cream. Very tasty! There are lots of recipes out that that you can change to fit your lifestyle. I make spaghetti with turkey burger and they don't know. They eat it and hardly notice. My husband and daughter have learned to give and take. Some nights they eat what I make and it's healthy and some nights they cook and I eat what they make. Sometime I have to eat a salad on their day of cooking at lunch so I stay in the calories but I really like salad. Also don't cry either, don't do that to yourself, don't bring yourself down . Just because it's in the house doesn't mean you have to eat it. Have plenty of fruits on hand or if you like veggies(I do while I read) do those. But no eat's healthy 24/7 but don't let it upset you. Just keep trying and if you need to vent then do so and post.
We'll be here to listen and offer support.

kimber607

Hi

I think (personal opinion) that 1200 is too low for anyone..regardless of how much weight u have to loose
Maybe you were feeling too restricted/deprived/hungry which has caused you to want to binge or go off your program
Tomorrow is a new day, forget about the past anbd the scale and get back on track.,...your body wil respond

Kim

randimockensturm

I am struggling too. but this group is GREAT. KEEP IT UP. The 21 lbs is off somehow. You mis-read the scales before or after. but don't get stuck on that part of this. The goal is to get yourself healthy and noone but you can do this. If others in your household are reluctant to take weight off then they will do everything they can do to make sure you go back to your old ways - it will be more comfortable for THEM. That said.... I would do something if I were you - but I'm sort of an 'all or nothing' type of person.

1) throw out ALL unhealthy food from your house REPLACE WITH ALL healthy food - it would be good to enlist family members to help in this process so they are on board with a healthy change.

2) Announce that anyone who wants to eat unhealthy should go to the corner store and eat that crap. BUT NOT in your house anymore - and NOT in FRONT of you. PERIOD - lay down the law woman!

3) Put around healthy snacks in the house. A dish of celery with carrots with a low calorie dip. bowls of cherries, peaches apple slices with no fat fruit yogurt for dipping.

4) Make a meal plan with all family members present.

5) This is a pain in the butt but works for me. PACK YOUR LUNCH AND SNACKS for the day and put them in a lunch box - and DO NOT eat anything that is outside your lunch box.

6) Here is something someone here told me to do and I used it this past weekend and IT WORKED!
put in your foods ahead of time. AND STICK TO IT.

7) EAT a small bowl of oatmeal as the afternoon snack before going grocery shopping. Make sure you are eating throughout the day so you don't get cravings when your blood sugar drops.

8) keep coming back to this site EVEN ON WEEKENDS.

9) DON'T eat at your desk, get up and walk somewhere to eat. and when you do eat, EAT SLOWLY.

9) REMEMBER - you are probably doing better than you thought.

10) DON'T EVER GIVE UP!

I know how frustrated you are and so do dozens of others here. I was just going to write a note that I was getting frustrated too! Keep up your good work - you are going in the right direction girl! chin up

gabi_ele

Ok I'm with mechanic, I think you cut too many calories at once and you are starving yourself. I looked at your profile and you need to eat a lot more, for one your body will stop loosing and go into starvation mode and for 2 you will have a hard time sticking to such a low calorie intake. I also have over 100 pounds to loose but I'm taking the slow road. It takes a while to loose it slow but I can stick to it and eat healthy , I don't feel deprived at all and if I know I'm going to have some cake or pizza I'll do extra exercises to make sure I have the calories. If I think that I will never eat this again I will crave it so I'll tell myself maybe tomorrow or a find a lower calorie version ( check hungrygirl.com)
I also can't count on much support around here ( my husband is one of those that can eat whatever he wants and not gain an ounce) but since I am the one cooking I just don't tell him what I put in there:bigsmile: . I have lightened a lot of my recepies and he hasen't even noticed:laugh: and I have all of you for support....If I get down I'll read some of the funny things on here or some of the success stories and I can do it, one day at a time.
My advice to you is eat healthy, watch your portions and get some exercise in, you will see how great you feel i n a couple of days...

Juliebean

I know how frustrated you must be right now, but you can do this! Just think about how hard you have worked! All of that sacrifice and suffering was for a reason. You will continue to lose and feel so great, you just have to get your motivation back!

The weight didn't go on overnight (even though sometimes it feels like it!) so it's not going to come off overnight either. :grumble: I would suggest increasing your caloric intake for the day. 1200 seems so low! Try keeping some 100 calorie packs at work. That's what I've started doing. Hershey's has a really great snackster bag, which helps with the chocolate cravings and if you really can't resist that junk food then just try a little portion control. Have a few chips, just not the whole bag. Depriving yourself is only going to lead to binge-eating, and no one wants that!

You're so strong and motivated, I know you will get through this! Good luck!

mrsyac2

Are you saying you gained 22lbs in a weekend?:noway: - cause thats not possible- You can still eat the same things as everyone just in smaller portions- you shouldn't deprive yourself because then it is a diet which nobody sticks too- however if you just train yourself that you can eat the same things in smaller portions you will be fine and still lose weight-- I eat the same things just in smaller portions- Im sure my kids and husband wouldn't be happy eating like rabbits and only eating chicken- I just eat smaller portions I rarely even use my large plates anymore I eat off of plates the same size as my children where it looks like i have alot of food just not too much--


If your scale said you gained 22lbs in a weekend then you probably need a new one or the battery needs to be changed cause in order to gain 22lbs you would have needed to eat 77,000 calories I doubt you ate that much

jlr1115

I read all of the other responses and it sounds like you've got some great advice and I agree with much of it. Increase calories some; increase exercise. The one thing I want to add about eating is to learn to eat in a way that you can live with so this is a lifestyle change. You can't "diet" forever, so you need to make lifestyle changes. I recently subscribed to Taste of Home Healthy Cooking magazine and I love it! And - I'm a horrible cook. But, I figured since I needed to learn to cook anyway I may as well learn to cook healthy. It's what I call "normal" food but lightened up. You could check out their website to see a sample, but make sure you look for the healthy recipes because not all on the website recipes are. The magazine gives nutritional information for each recipe, which I like. Because before, if it was any kind of casserole or mixed type of food I didn't know how to count calories. Just make sure you watch portion sizes. Last night I cooked Sweet and Sour Chicken and had it over a 1/2 cup of rice. It was pretty darned good if I say so myself. And my husband, who's not a chicken fan said it was very good! Good luck...hang in there. I don't have as much to lose (this time around), but I have in the past and that's why I'm back to changing my habits now (because of those bad habits are so much easier than the good ones). One other thing...I don't forbid myself anything because if I do that's all I think about. However, I make myself go out to get the "treat"...like a small DQ cone or even if I crave chips, I go by a single serving size so I can't overeat. Hang in there!