I NEED HELP!!!

spaul82478

Ok.. so I have been on here since about april... I was doing really well. BUT now I am doing bad.. Gaing back everything i have worked so hard for... this is my dilema.

I can not eat what I want. I can in moderation but it puts me in a bad place.... I feel guilty telling my bf that I am hungary every 3 hrs.. This is what Happens when i eat right. I need to eat often.. THEN I feel even more guilty when we go out to familys homes or even just out... I hate spending money eating out every three hours when we are out and about, I hate being the "PICKEY EATER AND UNGREATFUL ONE" I hate that people don't understand how hard it is... I have had this problem my whole life... BUT its getting harder.. I am turning 30 in less than two months.. and Its getting harder and harder to loose.. now I have these dilemas that just make me so unhappy.. My bf LOVES ME FOR ME.. and dont say anything bad but I know I am whiney when I get hungry. I mean what am I supposed to do... Any suggestions... and thanks for listening... What do I say at peoples houses so im not rude or prissy i guess you could say so I can be polite and eat what I need to or just not eat while there.... also.... THANKS A MILLION

steph :bigsmile:

spaul82478

Ok.. so I have been on here since about april... I was doing really well. BUT now I am doing bad.. Gaing back everything i have worked so hard for... this is my dilema.

I can not eat what I want. I can in moderation but it puts me in a bad place.... I feel guilty telling my bf that I am hungary every 3 hrs.. This is what Happens when i eat right. I need to eat often.. THEN I feel even more guilty when we go out to familys homes or even just out... I hate spending money eating out every three hours when we are out and about, I hate being the "PICKEY EATER AND UNGREATFUL ONE" I hate that people don't understand how hard it is... I have had this problem my whole life... BUT its getting harder.. I am turning 30 in less than two months.. and Its getting harder and harder to loose.. now I have these dilemas that just make me so unhappy.. My bf LOVES ME FOR ME.. and dont say anything bad but I know I am whiney when I get hungry. I mean what am I supposed to do... Any suggestions... and thanks for listening... What do I say at peoples houses so im not rude or prissy i guess you could say so I can be polite and eat what I need to or just not eat while there.... also.... THANKS A MILLION

steph :bigsmile:

CMartin6706

Carry carrot sticks with you. Fill-up on protein rich foods and berries of all kinds. Fruit and veggies are going to be your keys. Have you ever tried drinking two glasses of water before you eat? You get your water in that way plus you fill-up before you eat. Protein is really going to help though since it stays in the stomach the longest. Are you lifting too? You have to...it's a must. Try bagging a few of your favorite treats/items in small portions. Label them and allow yourself one a day. It could take you all day to eat at bag, but you only get one and it has to be a small portion. Starving yourself isn't going to work. Hang in there though.

- L

spaul82478

OH i eat.. I love to eat fruits and veggies and I eat an excessive amount of protein.. lots of water and I now walk to work.. BUT my biggest problems fall when we go places that make or order food., which is every weekend. we can be out and about for hours... thanks for listening :bigsmile:

jdelisle

Bring healthy snacks with you. This will help you save money as well. You can get those little picnic coolers that you could throw in the backseat of your car or where ever. One of my favorite things to do is have a picnic and there are so many easy, healthy foods that you can make! Summer rocks for fresh vegetables, fruits, etc. Farmers markets are really great places to load up on these kinds of things.

I find that the first couple of weeks of any kind of diet change are the roughest. You think of food all of the time and you have withdrawals from caffeine, sugars, etc. and crazy mood swings! Its like anything you give up, you have to get over that initial craving period. You need to give your body sometime to adjust. you will feel so much better soon, trust me! Your body will rid itself from certain toxins and you will start having more energy and just feeling clearer overall!

Just relax, have a bath, go for a walk, read a book...

School19

You may want to consider reading about the techniques designed by Paul McKenna. Possibly it would be a better program for you. www.mckenna.com

ChubbyBunny

Hmmmm research or keeping snacks on you or in the car.

School19

Not research. Just brainstorming for someone in need.

spaul82478

Hmmmm research or keeping snacks on you or in the car.

Yeah... really... thanks chubbybunny... I love this site and I do well.. I just hate people telling me that YOU CAN EAT WHATEVER... you look fine blah blah

faithloveandhope

I know what you mean. It takes a lot of mental planning ahead of time on what exactly you will do and order when out in a restaurant. All the other not so good and healthy foods look and smell sooo good that it is really easy to say, oh well, just this time. Try to think of it being a permanent life time change and become creative on how you order...light dressings on the side (so you still won't use so much...I sometimes dilute with straws full of water...switch it up with vinegarette, light on the oil), going green or colorful with the veggie choices, or ask for the to go box to be brought when your food comes ...and then immediately put half in the box so it's not so tempting to eat the restaurant's over sized portions. All stuff you've probably heard...KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK...YOU can do it!!

spaul82478

I know what you mean. It takes a lot of mental planning ahead of time on what exactly you will do and order when out in a restaurant. All the other not so good and healthy foods look and smell sooo good that it is really easy to say, oh well, just this time. Try to think of it being a permanent life time change and become creative on how you order...light dressings on the side (so you still won't use so much...I sometimes dilute with straws full of water...switch it up with vinegarette, light on the oil), going green or colorful with the veggie choices, or ask for the to go box to be brought when your food comes ...and then immediately put half in the box so it's not so tempting to eat the restaurant's over sized portions. All stuff you've probably heard...KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK...YOU can do it!!

Thanks.... It has been a hard couple of weeks.. TOMORROW is a new week... Thanks for the encouragement.... I REALLY NEEDED IT :bigsmile:

kittybellenir

Pack Snacks: Apples, Fiber One Bars, Quaker Mini delights, pretzels, keep a baggie of carrots, drink a coke zero while your out, oranges, trail mix, pistachios. Oh and the good thing is alot of these you can keep in your car so that way they are there when you need something .

This is what works for me, cause I get the same way, it also helps me from not pulling over to the first fast food resturant I see and ordering double beefy cheesy with fried whatever I see

spaul82478

Pack Snacks: Apples, Fiber One Bars, Quaker Mini delights, pretzels, keep a baggie of carrots, drink a coke zero while your out, oranges, trail mix, pistachios.

This is what works for me, cause I get the same way, it also helps me from not pulling over to the first fast food resturant I see and ordering double beefy cheesy with fried whatever I see

Thanks... :bigsmile:

ChubbyBunny

Oh hun...I can't eat whatever I want...it turns into a month long binge!

I keep snacks in my car, in my purse, around the house.

If you know you are going to a certain place to eat...do a little research (cause it DOES help and makes you aware of what calories are in foods). Now not everywhere has nutrition stuff on their website but you can get ideas.

It is a lot of work but if we just let ourselves go....well....that's how we got here...:laugh:

spaul82478

Oh hun...I can't eat whatever I want...it turns into a month long binge!

I keep snacks in my car, in my purse, around the house.

If you know you are going to a certain place to eat...do a little research (cause it DOES help and makes you aware of what calories are in foods). Now not everywhere has nutrition stuff on their website but you can get ideas.

It is a lot of work but if we just let ourselves go....well....that's how we got here...:laugh:

Ya I know.. ITS harder when I am at peoples home... resturaunts Im not to bad at cuz i normally eat what i know is safe.. but Pizza, brats, anything people make I CANT EAT.... it sucks..... I acutally made people uncomfortable at places cuz i asked for "SPEICAL ORDERS" at resturaunts and at there house I said Im SORRY i just cant eat it... but they dont get it...... I feel your month long binge.. its been 2 weeks now.. and I just cant stop... UGH..... trying hard really...:bigsmile:

ChubbyBunny

It takes a lot to stop one, but we gotta remember why we are on this site. It's typically not for someone else. It's for us and so we feel better about who we are.

You know what...make them feel uncomfortable. It's your right. Ask to bring food to someones house, that way you know you have at least one thing you can eat.

My mom is a diabetic and struggled all her life with weight. Over the last few years with her controling it by diet I am so impressed and proud of her cause she will turn down stuff she can't eat or she know's will make her sick or send her into a binge. She has more willpower then me....Dang if I don't keep chocolate in my freezer!

You can do this. Take baby steps and be prepared.

spaul82478

It takes a lot to stop one, but we gotta remember why we are on this site. It's typically not for someone else. It's for us and so we feel better about who we are.

You know what...make them feel uncomfortable. It's your right. Ask to bring food to someones house, that way you know you have at least one thing you can eat.

My mom is a diabetic and struggled all her life with weight. Over the last few years with her controling it by diet I am so impressed and proud of her cause she will turn down stuff she can't eat or she know's will make her sick or send her into a binge. She has more willpower then me....Dang if I don't keep chocolate in my freezer!

You can do this. Take baby steps and be prepared.

I guess I will just have to do what I was doing and not care what they say.. I just hate meeting new people (my bf family) and sounding like a b***h ya know.... but I guess Only I can do it and no one else can.... I will have to keep snacks with me, drink H2O at places and Make sandwiches when we go to others houses.... I KNOW i can do it its just hard..... and I needed to know IT was ok to be pickey...:bigsmile: THANKS

ChubbyBunny

Oh hun...I'm always one of those (B$@%&amp....it's a curse.

You aren't being picky per say....you are taking control of your health via food choices. You are choosing to be educated and....selective.

I also have found that I feel soooo much better when I drink water, especially when I am out to dinner. Even if I go over with my meal the water seems to help. I only drink my water cold so I keep a few bottles and a water filter jug in the fridge.

fateschild

It's perfectly fine to make people uncomfortable with choosing to eat what you want.

Does you BF's family know that you are trying to lose weight? If so they should be considerate and try to make an effort to provide you with other options at meals or at least understand when you bring your own. I chose to give up meat several years ago and it made it very awkward with my family for a while. But now my Mom calls me and arranges what food we are going to be eating, so that I am comfortable with our meal.

And I know that the average person doesn't like to be reminded that their own diet is generally terrible. So some of their discomfort is from you reminding them of what they should be doing themselves.

Keep up the fight. I know that I have just joined here, but I have also been fighting my weight for my whole life. This year I am determined that I will finally get myself to a healthy weight.

I know that you can do it too.

spaul82478

It's perfectly fine to make people uncomfortable with choosing to eat what you want.

Does you BF's family know that you are trying to lose weight? If so they should be considerate and try to make an effort to provide you with other options at meals or at least understand when you bring your own. I chose to give up meat several years ago and it made it very awkward with my family for a while. But now my Mom calls me and arranges what food we are going to be eating, so that I am comfortable with our meal.

And I know that the average person doesn't like to be reminded that their own diet is generally terrible. So some of their discomfort is from you reminding them of what they should be doing themselves.

Keep up the fight. I know that I have just joined here, but I have also been fighting my weight for my whole life. This year I am determined that I will finally get myself to a healthy weight.

I know that you can do it too.

Thanks.... Its hard with other peoples familys.. my mom will do what ever i ask..so... but yeah the people that have the issues are the ones struggling themselves.... so.... THANKS AGAIN:bigsmile:

jbeasinger

GUM!! i find gum helps me ALOT when i am working an i get hungry between meals.

Trident splash- watermelon & lime!!

YUM!!

age1389

Well I'm probably going to repeat what others have already but here it goes.....
When your eating at other peoples homes and feel that you should eat the food then just portion it out. If you know ahead of time that you will be eating there plan for it. There's always going to be a time that your gonna eat somewhere else but home and it seems that you do it often so in order to be successful is to plan plan and more planning. Save some extra calories for the occasion. And you don't have to eat tons of the food just a small portion of it. Drink lots of water and eat slowly.
As for eating out do what YOU need to do. If you have to order somthing special then you have every right to do so. If someone has a problem with it... Oh well that's there problem. Don't let others stop you from reaching your goals.
And of course pack snacks when you are on the go.
I want you to succeed so please think of yourself before you think of others. Your doing this for YOU!!:flowerforyou:

Adrienne

pmkelly409

I hope I didn't miss this in one of your posts, but what about you bringing a dish with you to these people's homes? you can bring something that you made so you have control of the ingredients, then you can fill up on that and take what I call 'no thank you' helpings of the stuff they make (those are just very small portions of the food they make so you can say you did eat it)

Also, when you eat out - it is your $$ you get the food the way you want it!

Please also be very honest with everyone you socialize with that you are making a lifestyle change and you would appreciate their support. Saying to you that you can eat whatever you want is selfish on their part - it is your life and it will be way to short if you don't take control.

good luck!

sunnyholtz

Hey Steph. I hate going to someones house and telling them I am "dieting" because then I get all self conscious and think people are looking at me and everything I eat. I know it is probably in my head, but I get around it. I bring my own monster salad with all the fixings and then when it comes to dinner time I pull out my stuff and just say "you know, my doc says I need to eat more veggies and if I get them in before dinner I am more likely to eat them". I make sure my salad is so big it takes the whole dinner to eat it, and when people are starting to clean up I am usually not hungry anymore and I no one seems to notice what I did or didn't put in my mouth. Bizarre, I know. But I really feel weird changing my eating habits around people I know. Maybe because I think that they expect certain behaviors from me and will harass me if I make a point of it. Once again, I know it is a weird thing but I just feel strange thinking everyone is noticing what I eat. So not coming out and saying "hey I can't eat this stuff its too many calories" just doesn't work for me. Probably that way too nice gene that I have to work on - nice guys always finish last and are overweight? Boy, just writing this is making me realize that I have to work on some self-esteem issues! LOL.

And as far as eating out goes... I always drink a lot of water and have a snack or a bar before I go in. Then when I make my choice it is not out of hunger and I think better. I have them bring me a carry out box with my meal and immediately put half of it in the container so that I don't eat the whole thing.

For me, as I loose the weight it is easier to confront people and tell them that I am loosing and how much and what kind of life style changes I am making. Maybe soon I will be strong enough to come out to friends and say "hey, aren't you going to serve some food that is actually good for you and not packed with calories?!". I can't wait for that day.

I know it is tough, and I know there is a big reason you are going this besides wanting to look good. So please hang in there. I KNOW YOU CAN DO IT!

spaul82478

:bigsmile: Thanks everyone for taking the time out to give advice, It is much appreciated.. :bigsmile:

spaul82478

Hey Steph. I hate going to someones house and telling them I am "dieting" because then I get all self conscious and think people are looking at me and everything I eat. I know it is probably in my head, but I get around it. I bring my own monster salad with all the fixings and then when it comes to dinner time I pull out my stuff and just say "you know, my doc says I need to eat more veggies and if I get them in before dinner I am more likely to eat them". I make sure my salad is so big it takes the whole dinner to eat it, and when people are starting to clean up I am usually not hungry anymore and I no one seems to notice what I did or didn't put in my mouth. Bizarre, I know. But I really feel weird changing my eating habits around people I know. Maybe because I think that they expect certain behaviors from me and will harass me if I make a point of it.

And as far as eating out goes... I always drink a lot of water and have a snack or a bar before I go in. Then when I make my choice it is not out of hunger and I think better. I have them bring me a carry out box with my meal and immediately put half of it in the container so that I don't eat the whole thing.

I know it it tough, and I know there is a big reason you are going this besides wanting to look good. So please hang in there. I KNOW YOU CAN DO IT!

THANKS.... HAHA... At least one person in my family understands completely and wont' judge me..lol.... your rock lyss

sunnyholtz

Steph, I never judge. Never. I totally get it!

sunnyholtz

Steph, I never judge. Never. I totally get it!

spaul82478

Steph, I never judge. Never. I totally get it!

I KNOW.... but ya know some people do... like recent blog posts..lol...