It just drives me crazy!

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LML79
LML79 Posts: 697
in Health and Weight Loss
Negative people...I know they mean well..but still! Ever since I lost some weight they come out from behind the bushes to tackle me! First it was my mom..who commented I'm loosing too much weight..I must be stressed out..or something is wrong ( Couldn't POSSIBLY be because I have been eating better and burning calories...right!?!) ...then over this weekend we had a big cookout here.. And yes..whenever we have something like this going on..I give my self a bad-eating pass for a bit.. Friends and family we haven't seen in a while commented on how I've lost weight..and good for you and stuff..... then.. my Father in law starts with the "Gosh I hope you don't loose anymore weight...well...so long as you are happy... but take care of yourself..you don't want to loose anymore" type of comments...like four times in the day and again while he was saying his goodbyes. UGH!!!! and every once in a while someone will make a comment when I pass up on certain things because I'm trying to be careful...and they say "What..you are gonna start starving yourself now?" or" You gotta eat something!" Sure..I gotta eat..but not a double cheeseburger from the drive thru!
People just love to tear you down sometimes! it's starting to get very frustrating!

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  • LML79
    LML79 Posts: 697
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    Negative people...I know they mean well..but still! Ever since I lost some weight they come out from behind the bushes to tackle me! First it was my mom..who commented I'm loosing too much weight..I must be stressed out..or something is wrong ( Couldn't POSSIBLY be because I have been eating better and burning calories...right!?!) ...then over this weekend we had a big cookout here.. And yes..whenever we have something like this going on..I give my self a bad-eating pass for a bit.. Friends and family we haven't seen in a while commented on how I've lost weight..and good for you and stuff..... then.. my Father in law starts with the "Gosh I hope you don't loose anymore weight...well...so long as you are happy... but take care of yourself..you don't want to loose anymore" type of comments...like four times in the day and again while he was saying his goodbyes. UGH!!!! and every once in a while someone will make a comment when I pass up on certain things because I'm trying to be careful...and they say "What..you are gonna start starving yourself now?" or" You gotta eat something!" Sure..I gotta eat..but not a double cheeseburger from the drive thru!
    People just love to tear you down sometimes! it's starting to get very frustrating!
  • Shannon023
    Shannon023 Posts: 14,529 Member
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    Well you are looking a little frail, honey. {{snicker}} :flowerforyou: You look stunning in your pics, they're just jealous! :love:


    I had someone ask me if I had a disease. Niiiiice. rolleyes.gif
  • kellch
    kellch Posts: 7,849 Member
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    Yeah I get the same thing...Instead of "Wow, you look great!" or "Good Job" pat on back....(well I do get some of that too) But at work I have all these people saying " you need to plump yourself back up" or "don't lose anymore weight" or my Grandma said "you're not turning anorexic, are ya?" And I had this other old guy at work tell me not to lose anymore weight because my face looks sunken in!!! :noway: :grumble: :explode: :mad: I just looked at him and said "Well, thanks Joe!" I asked my fiance if my face looked sunken in and he said "no, I think you look great" And I asked him if he thought I should stop losing weight...He said he loves me the way I am but that I don't look sunken in and that I do have a little chubby belly still and it wouldnt hurt to tone up a little and maybe lose a few more lbs....Then he said "but I think you're beautiful" LOL...Good SAVE BUDDY!!! :laugh: I don't know if he just knows better or if it was the truth but I have to say I agree that I still have a little ways to go...and ALOT of toning up :bigsmile:
  • diannholland1965
    diannholland1965 Posts: 782 Member
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    I THINK I understand what the problem with them is, Well OTHER then the jealousy thing of course.
    In America, there is a constant stream of “STARS” that are eating badly, And ONCE in a while they add those that are eating healthy TO that list and even though they look great they are still accused of not eating right. Because face it this is the fattest nation in the WORLD! The media puts people that are in shape under a microscoop of good bad and ugly, and America eats this information (wrong as it is) up.
    NOT to MENTION, that when people that do not have the fortitude to even TRY to do what we are doing, they think that if you are not eating the way that they do that you are not eating right.
    This is something normal.
    TRY to look at it this way.
    They are trying to justify themselves, and unfortunately they are doing that by tearing down someone else, In this case they are tearing down us. Just try to remember how GREAT you look and how much better you are going to look and how healthy you are. :bigsmile:
    When THEIR arteries are SCREAMING “HEEEEEEEEEEELP MEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!” :huh:
    --Diann...
  • kimber607
    kimber607 Posts: 7,128 Member
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    Yup, I get those comments as well...stinks
    I never got...you look great..good job
    I only get comments like..." I hope you're eating"..." I hope you don't want to get any thinner"...blah blah
    Dh is right there to back me up and tell everyone I'm eating healthy and working out

    I don't know what it is??

    Kim
  • PrincessLaundry
    PrincessLaundry Posts: 2,758 Member
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    You are doing a great job! I think most people have no clue what to say...they just blurt it out.

    When my husband had cancer I learned something...You ready for this? You sure? Here it goes.

    People's mouths are stupid.

    There you have it....it's the cure all. It doesn't mean people are stupid, but they have no clue what to say, they know what they want to say something, but it comes out in dumb mush. They mean well, but have no clue what to say.

    We had people say all sorts of things that were dumb. One of my favorites is when someone told my DH during his treatments, "Well, at least you get a new haircut now!" WTF? :huh: Ya, get a a new haircut? IDIOT!

    So Just figure that people's mouths are stupid. They want to compliment, but don't know how. Keep up the great work and say, "THANK YOU!" often. :noway:
  • rosabella
    rosabella Posts: 194 Member
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    They're just jealous. You're hot. They know they "should" lose some weight, and they've spent so long telling themselves that nobody else is doing it so they won't either that when they see you actually DOING it, they want you to stop. Just take it as motivation that you are doing really well!! :laugh:

    And I second PrincessLaundry on that people are stupid.
  • BlackBeltLJ
    BlackBeltLJ Posts: 190
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    Well, I am eating most of my meals with my in-laws- MIL says- " I don't know what you can eat so I'll fix something for everyone and you get what you want", " I don't know why you have to eat all that special food" "It seems like a lot of trouble to me" "Yeah you could probably loose some weight (I am at least 40 more pounds to go) "well I think that you should cook what the kids want to eat" :grumble:

    I am a diabetic and I have found a good way to control my food intake- I buy the right food that I like to eat!! I am also a flexitarian (no beef or pork) so I eat a lot of chicken- my kids want to eat burgers, fries, hamburger helper, pizza, mac-n-cheese- I can't eat that stuff! :noway: So our deal at home is, try what I made- if you don't like it, make something else. This works for us! Of course, MIL sees my husband and boys "wasting" away (the oldest son needs to loose some weight, and the hubby could too!

    My daughter looks at me and we grin- The men folk have been on their own since last Sunday (6th)- so far they have had pizza, tacos, hamburgers and spaghetti- all with the meat that I cannot eat- That is fine with me since they are doing the work- I have told the kids (ages 17, 15, 13 ) that anytime they want something like tacos, hamburgers, spaghetti with meat sauce- they can cook it- they all have their scout cooking badges.

    Okay- that is my rant for today- I have made a chicken casserole my way and an apple crisp/something or other (oatmeal, apples, applesauce, sugarless coconut, eggs, flour, cinnamon, vanilla and splenda) that smell great- I'll share :love: :bigsmile:
  • AugustBaby1973
    AugustBaby1973 Posts: 144
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    The comments your family made were rude and uncalled for, BUT....:ohwell: ....I must say this as a pleasingly plump woman--or fluffy, as I love to call myself! There are some people who take losing weight to the EXTREME, and then they look unhealthy! :sick: No one on the outside may know what you're planning to do--get that old high school cheerleader look back, plan for a baby or just want to fit in that cute little black dress for a nice evening out with your hunka hunka burnin love!:smooched: I look at it this way: as long as you're losing weight in a healthy fashion and you're not endangering your health, then go for it!! :drinker: But, if you are 5'7" tall and 135 pounds one day, and then you've dropped to 100 pounds the next few weeks, then that's just rediculous and dangerousl! :frown:

    :heart: Button
  • Juliebean
    Juliebean Posts: 317
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    I honestly think that people just don't know what to say. I think they tell you what they "think" you want to hear. I mean, think about it. If someone came up to me and said "Wow you look great! How much weight have you lost now? You're looking so skinny!" my immediate thought would be sheer joy! I'd probably do a happy dance right then and there. But there are some people who would think/say "Well how bad did I look before?!" My thought is this: You can't live your life for other people, you can only live for you. If you feel healthy and look healthy and are happy doing what you're doing, then keep on keepin' on! I personally think you look amazing! :wink: Keep up the great work!
  • LML79
    LML79 Posts: 697
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    The comments your family made were rude and uncalled for, BUT....:ohwell: ....I must say this as a pleasingly plump woman--or fluffy, as I love to call myself! There are some people who take losing weight to the EXTREME, and then they look unhealthy! :sick: No one on the outside may know what you're planning to do--get that old high school cheerleader look back, plan for a baby or just want to fit in that cute little black dress for a nice evening out with your hunka hunka burnin love!:smooched: I look at it this way: as long as you're losing weight in a healthy fashion and you're not endangering your health, then go for it!! :drinker: But, if you are 5'7" tall and 135 pounds one day, and then you've dropped to 100 pounds the next few weeks, then that's just rediculous and dangerousl! :frown:

    :heart: Button

    Yeah.. unfortunately..I will never be 5'7......and can only dream of seeing the scale tip to 135 LOL!!
    ( 5'2 max here at 145..yikes!)
  • kerrilucko
    kerrilucko Posts: 3,852 Member
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    This may be just me- and I totally agree that people can be stupid and some of the things you guys have written... well I can't believe people actually said that! -but I would totally rather have people not say anything. Nothing rude, nothing nice, just me for me who cares what I look like. I mean, I know people can tell I've lost weight, 30lbs and 3 clothing sizes tend not to go unnoticed, but it embarrasses and flusters me when people say things, even if they're nice things.
  • sunshine92
    sunshine92 Posts: 228 Member
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    i completely understand... my mom gets mad all the time because i wont eat what she cooks sometimes, or even when i wont get a cookie or a full fat drink at starbucks with her (i always get light or non fat). then she goes on with the comments "you dont need to lose anymore weight...etc." i think its because she's trying to justify herself for eating what she does. Dont take it personally... they're just jealous that you look better then they do! -lol- :happy:
  • JulieB21
    JulieB21 Posts: 492
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    I had a situation just like this over the weekend. We had a family BBQ and my mother arrived late so I had already eaten. She gave me her "what's wrong with you" face and said "have you eaten?"...Well-being pretty sick of hearing her say "Please take care of yourself" - I calmly said "Yea I'm pretty sure I ate yesterday":wink:

    I've never felt or looked healthier. I, too, believe that it's jealousy. My mother told me "life's too short & I don't care how many calories are in something-if I want it-I'm going to eat it". UGH

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