I cannot go back there!

peej76

The last week or so, I feel like I'm falling into a depression again and I'm fighting like crazy to keep it from happening. I feel so fat and ugly, and just plain blah. I've been keeping up on my exercises and eating not too badly, but getting worse as I feel a little more desperate everyday. I know it's nothing more than this little disease rearing it's ugly head again. My husband keeps trying to talk some sense into me, but I have a feeling he's at his wits end.

Today I woke up feeling a little better, but then we figured out what we still owe on our heating from the winter, then at the dentist today, they tried to electronically e-file my claim for the wisdom teeth extraction that will be happening on Monday and it wouldn't go through, so I may have to come up with the 1200 bucks by myself, then I just got this other thing in the mail saying I owe the gov. money, and they may stop my maternity leave benefits, I still have 6 months off. Something about when I was getting unemployment insurance in 2006, I started work and left my claim open. A couple of the weeks they say my income was higher than I claimed so now I have to try to figure out where on earth the miscalculation came from.

I'm trying to stay positive but man, I'm falling fast. I need a pick me up before I can't fight it anymore. I know what's to come if I go completely into this funk and I do not need that in my life right now. I refuse to let it take over, but sometimes it's hard to fight. Sorry for bearing my soul...yet again, but couldn't think of a better place to get such great support. Thanks guys!

peej76

The last week or so, I feel like I'm falling into a depression again and I'm fighting like crazy to keep it from happening. I feel so fat and ugly, and just plain blah. I've been keeping up on my exercises and eating not too badly, but getting worse as I feel a little more desperate everyday. I know it's nothing more than this little disease rearing it's ugly head again. My husband keeps trying to talk some sense into me, but I have a feeling he's at his wits end.

Today I woke up feeling a little better, but then we figured out what we still owe on our heating from the winter, then at the dentist today, they tried to electronically e-file my claim for the wisdom teeth extraction that will be happening on Monday and it wouldn't go through, so I may have to come up with the 1200 bucks by myself, then I just got this other thing in the mail saying I owe the gov. money, and they may stop my maternity leave benefits, I still have 6 months off. Something about when I was getting unemployment insurance in 2006, I started work and left my claim open. A couple of the weeks they say my income was higher than I claimed so now I have to try to figure out where on earth the miscalculation came from.

I'm trying to stay positive but man, I'm falling fast. I need a pick me up before I can't fight it anymore. I know what's to come if I go completely into this funk and I do not need that in my life right now. I refuse to let it take over, but sometimes it's hard to fight. Sorry for bearing my soul...yet again, but couldn't think of a better place to get such great support. Thanks guys!

michaelhe

Peej,

I don't know about you but I had a serious bout of depression a few years back and I swear that NutraSweet contributed to it. If you are using that artificial sweetener you might want to stop using it and see if that helps.

If money is the problem then you need to get on a written plan so you know what you need to do with your money. Once the plan is written out and you can see how it will come together than you will have it out of your mind and it won't be constantly pestering you. It sounds like you and your husband may need to sit down and figure this out together ASAP.

Also, prioritize what you owe and pay what you can based on what is the most important (for instance food, shelter, utilities first and then after that do what you can). For more information regarding financial planning I recommend daveramsey.com.

I hope this helps!!

Mike

dothompson

Given the list of financial issues you are facing right now. If you were to be feeling giddy and in control that would make you insane. It is normal to feel a little down when you are facing difficult circumstances. But you've seen enough of the ebbs and flows in life to know that this too shall pass. Look for reasons to find joy, beauty and blessings around you. Really try to focus on positive things.

You've lost 17 pounds!!!

You have 3 healthy children!!!

You have dental insurance!!!

.....

Keep up your exercise, it causes very strong mood enhancers.

Mary24

I know just how you feel, and my heart breaks for you:brokenheart:
and just when you think you've paid all the bills you get one from the government it happened to use 3 times in the past 3 months on top of that they stole from our child tax:explode:
They also said we owed them money:ohwell: now I think we are done with the gov bills but we'll see what happens this month:smokin:

Its like when the government owes you money it takes forever for them to pay but when you owe them money they take it from you without warning, or send notice after notice threatening you about something:frown:

Hang in there I have learned to trust God he has always gotten use out of our money problems everything will work out for you just wait and see, worrying does nothing but cause you unnecessary stress and as you mentioned depression.

Take it to the Lord in prayer:blushing:
I will say a prayer for you also.

Mary

sindyb9

I totally understand in financial over load myself. But when I get stressed I do not eat, so it has been hard to eat all my calories. Taking a long walk seams to help a whole lot. I am doing exactly what michealhe said and made payment arrangements on the sensitive bills and pay what I can on the others. If stressing out helped I would do it but it doesnt just makes you crazy. Take a deep breath and sit down and work it out. You can handle this. :flowerforyou: :drinker:

AugustBaby1973

I said a little prayer for you! :flowerforyou:

peej76

Thank you all! I finally broke down last night, but it made me even more frustrated as my husband just doesn't know what to say to me anymore and even more frustrating is I don't know what I want him to say. The money stuff is not usually a contributer to my depression, but it helped keep me down in the dumps yesterday because it was abit overwhelming all at once. I know it'll all work out, it has in the past. Like the old adage says when it rains it pours.

I just sometimes think I don't know what I want from this life anymore, I just want to be happy and leave all the other stuff behind. I know that it won't always be roses and sunshine but this just takes it to the other extreme. Along with this lifestyle change I also have learned to keep a positive attitude, but suffering from depression in the past, it gets really scary know when I hit a low because I just don't want to hit the ultimate low like I used to. I guess that's the worst part, is just knowing that someday I may not be strong enough to turn myself around again, and get stuck back in that place that is just so lonely and sad.

Essence320

Peej,
My heart goes out to you.:flowerforyou: I too suffered from depression but God brought me out of it. Mary gave you the right answer. First of all, don't worry about trying to prevent it yourself. Trusting in the Lord automatically ensures your victory. Yes, it may seem to get worse before it gets better but the enemy attacks in ways that have proved previously successful. I challenge you to praise your way through it. I know it sounds crazy but trust me it works. I have gone from multiple medications to none at all in less than a year. The massive change is in my medical records. Just thank God for your healing physically, mentally, spiritually, and financially knowing that when you have prayed from a pure heart He heard you the first time. Make praise and thanksgiving a constant in your day.
Read Psalm 13:1-6

As far as your questions about your life's direction, remember that YOU were made with a purpose. Once you know what it is you can line your life up with that and there will be no conflicting elements, ideas or actions. The easiest way to do that is to ask God to make you into who He created you to be. Ask God to help you rearrange your priorities to be in line with His will and the talents and abilities He has given you.
Read 1 Corinthians 15:10

I'm sorry if I have rambled.:blushing: This is a subject I am passionate about. You are more than welcome to contact me if you would like.

Love & Blessings