When you love your job but loathe your boss

nchandler22

Just curious if anyone out there can relate... I absolutely love my job, probably first time ever but I cannot stand my boss, at first I thought it was just me but there are so many people that feel this way and there is pretty much nothing that can be done about it because she is a long time friend of one of the owners...

with the economy how it is, I try to remind myself that I am lucky I have a job an just swallow it, I try to do the kill them with kindness thing, I try to just turn off the office and do my job, I try to confront and deal with the situation, it just doesn't ever get any easier

Today she had me so upset I was in tears, first time in over a year I have let her get to me like that and the first thing I did was eat pringles, I'd never noticed that when she gets under my skin or anyone for that matter, I eat...

I'm open for any suggestions an generally I do not get any responses on posts I make so I am hoping someone out there can relate... I am stressing wicked hard
:mad:

nchandler22

Just curious if anyone out there can relate... I absolutely love my job, probably first time ever but I cannot stand my boss, at first I thought it was just me but there are so many people that feel this way and there is pretty much nothing that can be done about it because she is a long time friend of one of the owners...

with the economy how it is, I try to remind myself that I am lucky I have a job an just swallow it, I try to do the kill them with kindness thing, I try to just turn off the office and do my job, I try to confront and deal with the situation, it just doesn't ever get any easier

Today she had me so upset I was in tears, first time in over a year I have let her get to me like that and the first thing I did was eat pringles, I'd never noticed that when she gets under my skin or anyone for that matter, I eat...

I'm open for any suggestions an generally I do not get any responses on posts I make so I am hoping someone out there can relate... I am stressing wicked hard
:mad:

Phoenix_Rising

I just left a situation like that. I'm a type A, perfectionist. Everyone makes mistakes, and as long as they try to do their best, I adore them. I had a coworker who was a slacker, never pulled his weight, did his job incorrectly, wouldn't listen to my training or corrections to his errors. My boss was no better -- worse than a slacker. When I complained about my slacker coworker who always gave incorrect information to people because he was too lazy to do his job correctly, my boss yelled at me, told me I was a trouble maker and I needed to find a new job. I sobbed.

It was meant to be though. I applied for a new job that day, got it, and am now very, very happy in that new job with great coworkers and a boss who value a job done correctly!!

Keep your chin up and KEEP LOOKING FOR ANOTHER JOB! That's my advice.

wildkitty505

Well I love my job and my boss now but I've been in your situation more than once. It's definitely a horrible situation, since you can't exactly escape your boss and it isn't the best time to try to find a new job, especially when you truly like the one you have. At some point you'll have to get out. Toxic situations at work tend to seep into your life outside of work until you're always stressed and upset. For now my best advice would be to remind yourself it isn't you its her (since people share your feelings) and instead of grabbing those pringles go for a walk. At least then you can thank her for helping you get a little more exercise each day!! :laugh:

Try to stay positive and keep you eye open for other positions, you never know when something might drop in your lap.

PrincessLaundry

I have no clue what to suggest because I stay at home with my kiddos. That's just how it is around where I live now, Mom's stay home. So good luck with your boss, that stinks! When my current boss's yell at me, I send them to their rooms or make them do laps around the house. When they give me too much work to do, I make them do it, and if they are unhappy with my managing skills, I send to clean their rooms. That's about all the help I am.

You mentioned that you normally don't get responses for your posts, as newer member you might not have noticed but there seems to be two "shifts" of posts. Some post in the AM, and some post in the evening. I miss many posts that go through until I just click on the tiny number under some one's name and that will show what threads they have been posting on. So if I haven't seen or heard from a particular person in a long time, I click there to see what they are up to, how their health stats are going and to see their latest workout trends. It is the only way to keep up with different cyber friends sometimes.

Like here...I REALLY wanted to post on this thread for you since I somehow missed your intro and welcoming you to the board. So welcome girlie!!! You will love it here. Sorry your work is going tough but it looks like you have been going through a lot of stress and are doing great so far! YEY YOU!

:drinker:

PrincessLaundry

Oh...and BTW!!! Your Saint Bernard's are totally cute!!! I have always wanted one. Our yard would be perfect...Lucky bug!

Poison5119

Just curious if anyone out there can relate... I absolutely love my job, probably first time ever but I cannot stand my boss, at first I thought it was just me but there are so many people that feel this way and there is pretty much nothing that can be done about it because she is a long time friend of one of the owners...

with the economy how it is, I try to remind myself that I am lucky I have a job an just swallow it, I try to do the kill them with kindness thing, I try to just turn off the office and do my job, I try to confront and deal with the situation, it just doesn't ever get any easier

Today she had me so upset I was in tears, first time in over a year I have let her get to me like that and the first thing I did was eat pringles, I'd never noticed that when she gets under my skin or anyone for that matter, I eat...

I'm open for any suggestions an generally I do not get any responses on posts I make so I am hoping someone out there can relate... I am stressing wicked hard
:mad:

There are ways of dealing with people like you describe here that can usually offset them. I had a situation like that with my coworker. Fortunately, with us it was a temporary problem.

1. Understand and believe you aren't the problem. Bullies like your boss are always looking to point fingers and foist blame and/or abuse on anyone else but themselves. They act like this because of insecurity and/or control issues.

2. Kill them with kindness - never think you can fight fire with fire. That will not work in a case like yours because you lower yourself to their level, then they can say "See, she's a jerk (just like me). Get her!" Patience, tolerance, and understanding will go a lot farther to lower your stress levels and combat them. Those are qualities they don't have, and they are the best weapons you have against them for your own peace of mind.

3. Never give in and react the way they're looking for you to. If you get angry, or cry, you give them a very special and useful gift - the means to remind you of your moment of weakness - and use it against you any way it suits them. Don't give them the ammunition they seek in order to fortify their position against you.

4. Vent, vent, vent. Talk with trusted friends or loved ones. Til you don't feel the need to carry it around with you. You need to get yourself to the point where it's not effecting the other aspects of your life.

Just some friendly suggestions. Good luck.

nchandler22

I actually breed them, my female is 121 lbs an my male is 186 lbs, they are the most loveable animals ever... my male is hilarious, if I am yelling about something, he will bark and whine louder then I am talking so I can't hear myself or roll over at my feet smacking me with his paws until i have to calm down laughs, he is a riot and I would be lost without my babies!!! Just had a litter of 13 its like having children all over again!!

nchandler22

will you come work with me?????????????????? laughs...

banks1850

I know people, say the word and she will mysteriously dissapear. For a small fee. :devil: