Yesterday, I commited a MFP SIN!!!
melbhall
Posts: 519
I'm such a bone head sometimes. I'm just glad that I usually realize it, and get over myself quickly as to hopefully redeem myself.
I had a lovely talk with my husband Saturday night, a 2 hour life changing/motivation talk. Life was good. Then Sunday as we head home from grocery shopping we talked about losing weight, getting healthy and taking back our lives and making positive changes. This is where I commited a sin.... as my hubby talked about his get healthy plans, I took offense, felt left out (because I'm pregnant and now is not the time to diet) and made a snarky comment about how he only wants to lose weight now because he probably saw some hot chick on his business trip in FL and felt the need to impress her. I kept rattling off random weird comments to embarassing to discuss now.
I let my fear/jealousy/I don't know what get in the way of a really positive change my husband wants to make with me. I almost felt possessed. Who says something like that to someone they love. I felt the error of my ways yesterday, but am really ready to apologize and make it right today. I want my super supportive husband to know he has my support, always. And I want him to realize I had a temporary brain lapse where I forgot how strong our relationship was and how much in love we are, and started acting like a jealous child not getting her way.
I'm not saying this is always the case, and people may not always realize it soon enough, but I'm sure others of you have had resistance from a friend or loved one when you mentioned losing weight and getting your life back. I let my insecurities and what not ruin his big "A Ha" moment and for that I'm eternally sorry. If you have had family/friends that seem to want to sabotage you, you should stand up for yourself, explain to them why you are doing this for YOU, and encourage them to be a part of your journey, and maybe you can be a part of theirs.
I apologize this is long, mispelled, and somewhat of a rant, but just know that the bully/ person sabotaging you is often only doing so because they have issues with themselves. YOU are a big enough reason to go on this journey and be successful at it, with or without the help of others. Do it for you and hopefully if you have a bone head in your life they will wise up soon enough so the can be a key player in your success story.
Thanks for listening!
I had a lovely talk with my husband Saturday night, a 2 hour life changing/motivation talk. Life was good. Then Sunday as we head home from grocery shopping we talked about losing weight, getting healthy and taking back our lives and making positive changes. This is where I commited a sin.... as my hubby talked about his get healthy plans, I took offense, felt left out (because I'm pregnant and now is not the time to diet) and made a snarky comment about how he only wants to lose weight now because he probably saw some hot chick on his business trip in FL and felt the need to impress her. I kept rattling off random weird comments to embarassing to discuss now.
I let my fear/jealousy/I don't know what get in the way of a really positive change my husband wants to make with me. I almost felt possessed. Who says something like that to someone they love. I felt the error of my ways yesterday, but am really ready to apologize and make it right today. I want my super supportive husband to know he has my support, always. And I want him to realize I had a temporary brain lapse where I forgot how strong our relationship was and how much in love we are, and started acting like a jealous child not getting her way.
I'm not saying this is always the case, and people may not always realize it soon enough, but I'm sure others of you have had resistance from a friend or loved one when you mentioned losing weight and getting your life back. I let my insecurities and what not ruin his big "A Ha" moment and for that I'm eternally sorry. If you have had family/friends that seem to want to sabotage you, you should stand up for yourself, explain to them why you are doing this for YOU, and encourage them to be a part of your journey, and maybe you can be a part of theirs.
I apologize this is long, mispelled, and somewhat of a rant, but just know that the bully/ person sabotaging you is often only doing so because they have issues with themselves. YOU are a big enough reason to go on this journey and be successful at it, with or without the help of others. Do it for you and hopefully if you have a bone head in your life they will wise up soon enough so the can be a key player in your success story.
Thanks for listening!
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Replies
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Great post. This is so true.0
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Yeah we've all been there girl, at least your big enough to come out and name your mistake and make amends for it. So good for you!!0
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Oh I totally understand I've been there esp. when preggers! It's great that you realized it and your sorry! I'm sure he'll understand!0
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Oh I totally understand I've been there esp. when preggers! It's great that you realized it and your sorry! I'm sure he'll understand!0
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Blame it on your pregnancy hormones!!! LOL Seriously, it's great that you saw that your actions were misguided and that you are supporting your husband. In turn, he will be there to help with the baby and support you when your ready to join him on the journey! Just think of what awesome parents you are going to be together.0
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sounds like the evil pregnancy hormones took over. they used to get me too :0) keep up the positive attitude though~0
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You expressed yourself really well here. You should let him read this.
Thank you for sharing this. I think we all can glean some good points.
Be well!0 -
Dont beat yourself up ... hormones and pregnancy make us girls a little crazy sometimes. And being pregnant is the perfect time to get exercise and eat healthier even if weight loss isn't the intent. Better physical shape will make labor, delivery and recovery easier ... and by eating healthier you won't gain too much weight while providing the baby and yourself better nutrition. Good luck ...0
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It's okay, I've done it too. I'm pretty insecure myself so i try my hardest to not show it around the bf. We've been together over a year and have lived together since month 2. So needless to say, we know each other pretty well. But i still get those crazy moments like every woman does. Don't feel bad, he'll understand. We're just hormonal at times and all you can do is be supportive from here on out! Good luck!0
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I Completely understand....
We All have had days like that..
thanx for the Post...0 -
Wow must be a pegnancy thing.... LOL. I just started this aboput a week ago and my Gf is also pregnant and i believe she said the same exact thing to me about gettting a hot girlfriend... I got defencive and reminded her that i am doing it for my health due to my high blood pressure and so i can be around for my new baby girl that is on the way and also for her. I am very much in love with her and want to spend the rest of my life with her.0
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If I was you I'd print this page and show it to him. Congrats on being big enough to admit you behaved in a less than ideal way and are ready to own up to it and be a super supportive wife to match your husband.0
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You expressed yourself really well here. You should let him read this.
Thank you for sharing this. I think we all can glean some good points.
Be well!
Big ditto!0 -
as my hubby talked about his get healthy plans, I took offense, felt left out (because I'm pregnant and now is not the time to diet)
Now is especially important for you to focus on healthy plans! No need to feel left out. What you put in your mouth affects someone else now, not just you. Diet and dietS are 2 very different things. Focus on your diet (what you eat), NOT on dietting (diets don't work anyway). You can be totally on board with hubby by eating/cooking healthy with him, even getting involved in work outs for expectant mommies. There are all kinds of things you can do to not feel left out. You can both get healthy, then when "mini me" joins the fam, you can teach them how to eat and be healthy too.0 -
You expressed yourself really well here. You should let him read this.
Thank you for sharing this. I think we all can glean some good points.
Be well!
Thanks! I will definitely let him read it. I told him I needed to apologize in person too. Sometimes I can be nuts, pregnancy horomones or not, I never want to stand in the way of someone bettering themselves.0 -
as my hubby talked about his get healthy plans, I took offense, felt left out (because I'm pregnant and now is not the time to diet)
Now is especially important for you to focus on healthy plans! No need to feel left out. What you put in your mouth affects someone else now, not just you. Diet and dietS are 2 very different things. Focus on your diet (what you eat), NOT on dietting (diets don't work anyway). You can be totally on board with hubby by eating/cooking healthy with him, even getting involved in work outs for expectant mommies. There are all kinds of things you can do to not feel left out. You can both get healthy, then when "mini me" joins the fam, you can teach them how to eat and be healthy too.
I completely agree. And I have been tracking and trying to make good decisions for me, so why I got jealous of him I have no idea....like I said, just a temporary brain lapse. But you are right, this is bigger than me!0 -
If I was you I'd print this page and show it to him. Congrats on being big enough to admit you behaved in a less than ideal way and are ready to own up to it and be a super supportive wife to match your husband.
He's on his way home now and I plan on showing it to him and aplogizing in person. He has been nothing but supportive of me (in all areas of my life) since the first day I met him. I'm a very lucky girl! And I think I've read enough posts on MFP to realize I don't want to be one of those people that bring others down when the just want to do something as simple as LIVE!0 -
Maybe you should show her my post and your comment. She sounds like a lucky girl. My husband has high blood pressure and I would and WILL do anything to get him healthy again. Pregnant or not, I should never be jealous and jabbing a finger at him when all he wants to do is get healthy for me and our children! I'm the luckiest girl alive to have found such a perfect match.0
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lol it's the hormones!!!! you can't be held accountable for everything you say =P. atleast you realized it and are ready to appologize, i'm sure he understands! it's understandable and excusable because when your pregnant it's almost like you are posessed at times! =P0
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Pregnancy makes us all a little (sometimes more than little) crazy. You are a great person for A) realizing that your emotions got the best of you and being a big enough person to say sorry.
You are amazing and your husband is blessed to have you!0
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