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suz3777

I am 45 years old with 4 children and also a full time student. many years ago i lost 145 pounds and stayed thin for 6 years. I did it all the wrong ways, eneded up with a bad eating disorder. I starved fo many years, I quit smoking and allowed myself to eat normal well a bit normal I was letting myself eat period, needless to say I put on 55 pounds. I feel horrible I destroyed my metabolism and my self esteem. I am sure like so many others I decide my worth by my weight I hate it. I am hoping to loose 45 pounds and do it right this time. I have tried everything nothing works from all the damage i caused i am stuck any pointers? I gave up wine, still do not smoke, did the gym thing still nothing