Have to VENT/Encouragment PLEASE

jen1516

Here's a thought on why the people closest to you haven't commented and it may have already been mentioned by someone else, but I didn't read each post. The people closest to you who see you every day may not realize the big change since they do see you every day. The people who don't see you as often are much more likely to notice. So it might not be anything bad as jealousy or anything like that. Kind of like how people say how fast my children are growing up when I may not notice it as much. But great work on the loss!!!! Keep standing your ground and keep up the great work!!!!

dmb0174

Thank you, thank you, thank you! I really do appreciate EVERYONE'S comments. It has just been a tough few days for me, not even really sure why... just lacking motivation and I just kept thinking if only I had support at home. Anyway, I do feel so much better after knowing I am not alone and knowing that I sure can get support on here if I just ask!

Thanks again... you truly are all the BEST!!!

arosegeo

A post I read earlier today from one of my MFP friends got me thinking. WHY do I have NO support (in real life) with trying to lose weight??? Honestly, my husband SAYS that he supports me but then EVERY night it is the same thing. "What do you want for a snack? Want some ice cream? How about some popcorn? Chips and Salsa?" I say no. No thanks. I'm not hungry. NO! But it still continues... "You know you have to eat." Argh! I DO eat. I actually am eating VERY healthy. I always eat three meals a day and often will throw in a snack or two. So why? WHY? Why does he persist with this food pushing? Does he NOT want me to lose weight? Sigh...

And unfortunately it is not just him. I recently started walking with a friend a few nights a week, which is a blessing, but she is forever saying, "Want me to make you some cookies? You like brownies don't you?" She knows that I am trying to lose weight but she always just kind of blows it off and says, "Eh, let's wait til summer and then we can DIET together." (which is not at all what I feel like I am doing) I truly am trying to make a lifestyle change but just really feeling bad because I feel like no one supports it.

So, WHY??? This is hard for me. I have been overweight since having my first daughter almost 8 years ago and I also feel like I am fighting a time clock because it seems as each year passes it gets harder so I want to do this NOW. I want to be healthy. I AM doing this. I am *almost* to the 20 pound lost mark and would be THRILLED to lose another 15-20 pounds but I just wish I had some support in day to day life.

Okay, I am so sorry for the long whining post but I just had to get this out! OH, and one tiny other little sore spot, same non-supporting people, have not made a single comment about the weight I have already lost. NOTHING. People who I barely know have noticed (so I know that there is a visible difference) but not darling hubby or friends. ARGH!

I promise, I am done now. LOL! Thanks for listening and I would love to hear anyone's thoughts, comments or suggestions.

for the people you see all the time not noticing can be because they have seen the gradual change. like growing up with someone and looking back on old pics and being stunned by how different you were then. they say the more things chang the more they stay the same.

amcblee

Do it for you. You have to remember that just because you're eating healthy, doesn't mean everyone else has the responsibility to cater to you. Don't put it on anyone else - encourage yourself! Plus, you need practice saying no because there are temptations all over!

Such good advice. It's easy to forget that while you have calorie counting, grocery lists, exercising and good decision-making on your mind 24/7... others don't. Even if they love you. And they don't care about you eating your exercise calories or going over on your protein limit. And they don't want to hear about the apple you had. They just don't want you to change or get all weird and freaked out about food. So go shopping for hot new clothes and strut circles around everyone with your chin a little higher than it was before. They'll notice that!

LukeEalden

In a weird way, I like this sort of temptation. I'll explain why...

I feel I'm much more likely, and have done so in the past, to fall to temptation when it's just me around and I feel I can 'get away with it'. When I'm with people who know I'm losing weight, a barrier comes up and I'm always good.

So the more people try to tempt me, the bigger and taller this barrier gets for me, thus I don't take the temptation. What it also does though, and this is why I like it, it makes me even more focused and strict with myself not to fall for temptation when I'm on my own like I had been before.

I hope this makes some sense to anyone, it does in my head!

Oh you are doing really well with the weight loss, I've learnt that although comments from other people are great, you have to get in the mindset of complimenting yourself on it. Be your own judge, at the end of the day it's you that you are doing it for.

ybba12490

I know what you mean! My friends all tell me that I look "fine." I am super tall so it only looks like I don't weigh a lot... I am overweight by about 30 lbs... nothing healthy about that! If I pass on a cupcake, my friend *sighs* and makes me feel guilty saying "UGH, I guess I'll eat alone..." My boyfriend is no help either. He is someone who eats fast food 3 times a day, drinks only soda, and STILL loses weight b/c of a high metabolism and his work is physical labor. Every night I visit him and he suggests dinner, its fast food. I tell him I can't eat it because I'm on a diet and he'll get annoyed! Like, seriously? And then he'll say I can take a "night off"... NO, not after I took a 'night off' 2 days ago! Show some support! (thanks for providing the space to rant, no one else listens )