Getting very, very frustrated!

LisaKyle11

Hi All-

Just before I sat down to type this post I said to myself, "I am done logging my calories...it simply does not work for me!"... So before completely throwing in the towel to all of these tools here at MFP and caving to my complete frustration, I thought I would send something out in hopes of some more insight (maybe sane(r) insight!). I have doing MFP for a couple of months and love it - the community and all the tools. BUT the main reason I am spending so much time here is in hopes of actually losing some weight! Just 1 year ago I was at 128 (I am 5'7") and now I am at 138... a good 10 lb gain. I do not look very different actually. All my clothes still fit (pretty much the same) and my legs look leaner... but wtf is up with this fairly large gain? My eating habits are pretty much the same -- very healthy, mostly whole, non-processed foods. Granted I am a Mom of 4 (so very busy) and sometimes have to grab what I can get on the run... I am active - yoga 2-3x a week (hot yoga 90- min classes) and walking hill around home 2-3 miles 3-4 times a week -- plus did i mention 4 kids? ;-) I am 41 years old (maybe that has something to do with this??), but no early menopause symptoms as of yet.

So, fellow MFP, what is the deal? Is it possible I am not eating enough?? I have a hard time wrapping my mind around that concept... I mean, people who don't eat enough, generally LOSE weight right? How do people GAIN when eating less? I know about the starvation mode theory and recognize it, but still gaining and eating 1200+ (ish) a day with exercise?

Thanks for your insights and experiences!

I still have ZERO pounds lost on my ticker!

~Lisa

MrsCon40

Muscle does weight more than fat.... a better guage might be to get a body fat caliper (they're super cheap).

(I'm from Fort Bragg/Willits!! Small world!)

RedHotRunner

Two things come to mind here. One is yes, your age. Your metabolism will slow down and it will be harder to lose weight. Two, you don't have that much to lose so it will take longer.

My suggestion would be to switch up your workout routine. Try something new and see if that helps.

Chiclet26

Ya, you did say you looked a bit "leaner." Maybe you have gained some muscle mass.

patio1313

Muscle is 7x as dense (I think that is the # I have heard) as fat and also if you are not getting enough to eat your body can go into what my nutritionist called "starvation mode" where it adjusts to burn less because it feels like it is not getting enough to sustain itself.

mistyb47711

Well...I am hoping I can help....You may need to go in and change your lifestyle. You may have it set on lightly active or lower and may not be getting enough calories. Please try this before you decide to leave us. It made a difference when I did this. You are very active and that just may be what you need.

roadbiscuit2000

Your eating looks pretty good I agree with the other poster you might have more lean muscle that is replacing fat leading the weight gain. You might try varying your workouts try something new perhaps to try and jumpstart weight loss. Depending on your height you may be at a good weight now and not really loose much in the way of pounds. Keep at it you should see results eventually.

RedHotRunner

Two things come to mind here. One is yes, your age. Your metabolism will slow down and it will be harder to lose weight. Two, you don't have that much to lose so it will take longer.

My suggestion would be to switch up your workout routine. Try something new and see if that helps.

One other thing. 128 is pretty darn lean for someone your height. I'm 5'6 1/2 and 135 pounds. It's REALLY hard for me to go much lower than that and takes a boatload of work.

gatorflyer

You seem to be very active and I have to wonder if it's muscle weight that is counter acting the potential weight loss. You might watnt o try increasing your calories into the 1200-1500 range to see if that helps, because if you aren't fueling your body with enough calories, you maybe counteracting the effects of weight loss.

jeffrodgers1

I would be inclined to agree... muscle weighs more than fat.

With all of the exercise you do, it is more likely you've gained muscle.

A more accurate measure would be to see what your percentage of body fat is.

Ocgrrl

It's really, really annoying actually. I run 4 miles a day, and I was logging EVERYTHING I ate, to the T. I specifically only ate things that had the exact calories, no homemade anything because I didnt want to be off on my calories. I still didnt lose weight, I was running 4 miles a night and only eating 800 cals per day, following the logic that OK, if I dont eat enough I should lose weight.

After killing myself like this for 3 days, I stepped on the scale. UP ONE. I wanted to tear my face off. That's how frustrated I was. Then I decided, that is not the way to go. I DEFINITELY WAS NOT EATING ENOUGH. The whole eating too few calories works, yes, AT FIRST. But then your body gets used to it and conserves its calories and you will not lose weight.

You HAVE TO HAVE TO HAVE TO count your calories, almost be obsessive about it if you want to lose weight. My guess, in all honesty, and especially having 4 kiddies, is that you are eating too much. You arent logging that handful of chips, or that one little cookie here and there. It really does add up. I am meticulous about counting my calories, and sometimes I forget one or 2 little crunch bars I had as a stupid snack. BAM, 140 cals that I forgot about. This is all very very annoying, BUT, HOW BAD DO YOU WANT IT?! If you want it, you will do it. Don't give up, so not worth it. Hang in there momma! Good luck.

Newfiedan

Muscle does weight more than fat.... a better guage might be to get a body fat caliper (they're super cheap).

(I'm from Fort Bragg/Willits!! Small world!)

No muscle does not weigh more than fat, it occupies a smaller volumetric space than fat does.

improvstitute

Are you using a heart rate monitor to get an accurate picture of how many calories you are burning? You didn't mention it, but if you are eating your exercise calories and those are based on the MFP estimates, that might be part of it.

Having said that, I agree that you have likely replaced fat with muscle. Your clothes fit better...you look leaner...you don't have far to go to begin with...those are all good things. Actual lbs lost is misleading anyway. I have lost 37lbs, but that is not an accurate measure of what is really going on. I could retain 5lbs of water tonight. What really counts are the other ways we measure. I have moved up 3 notches on my belt, my endurance level is waaaaay up and I feel really good most of the time. That is a HUGE improvement over where I was when I started in January. We put far too much emphasis on the actual number on a scale. It pretty much is meaningless if you think about it.

Stick with it! I bet all those logged in meals has kept you focused and that is important. I got really fat by not keeping track of it! Good luck!!!

juliapurpletoes

HI :flowerforyou:

I feel your frustration. Going through the same experience.

I am a small time loser as well, just 10 pounds or so. I've found that I really had to became very "perfect" in the way I report calories eaten and calories burned. So much of what is in the food database has been put in incorrectly, although by nice folks....and then sometimes we guess-timate what we actually eat, etc.

Then forget about the activity database being accurate..it is okay as just a general tool........it helps to get your own heart rate monitor AND report what it says given all of your specific information. (I also will back out my maintance calories from that number. I was advised to do this because being a small time loser I don't have the wiggle room to fudge all the computations.) Maybe that would work for you too.

It sounds like more work that it really is, sort of fun and scientific!!

Or my other thought was to see a nutrtionist who can really work up a great plan just for you.

I'm tall and thin like you, but the peri and post menopausal time will really take a toll on your muscle mass, it pays to start lifting weights too.

Alot of work on top of raising 4 kids I know!! It's what is working for me though!!

Best of luck and warm wishes.
Julia

seobstar

I do not mean for this to sound rude AT ALL but if you don't really look any different and all your clothes still fit the same then why are you so frustrated/ worried about the gain? Maybe the gain is just a hormonal or age thing? Also, with your height, 128 might just be too low for your body! That's very lean for 5' 7. I know everyone is different and has their own comfort zone for their weight so I am not judging you at all but just trying to encourage you that maybe you shouldn't worry so much about the acutal number if really everything else is seeming ok. Hang in there and good luck!!

cnjbarry

As a mom of three I know how hard it can be to eat right. you either dont feed yourself at all or are constantly nibbling on left over girlled cheese crust or that half of a cookie someone didnt eat!!! I would try to eat something every 2 hours or so. By looking @ your diary it looks like you dont eat lunch Stick with it the last 10 pounds are the hardest!!!:laugh:

Newfiedan

Without going into your diary I will repost what has helped many make it happen, this comes from my blog;

1) Eat breakfast try to gun for 30% protein, the reasoning is that it will raise the metabolic rate and get you started off right. Look at my diary to get an idea of what I do to make that happen. If you are pressed for time do a protein shake with some fruit and fiber mainly flax seed. Add a slice of rye or really nice grainy bread with some good peanut butter and you are off to a great start with a 5 minute breakfast. Make sure you eat this within 30 mins fo waking.

2) Carbs and fats are not your enemy, refined carbs and saturated fats are, these 2 create a vicious cylce that peak insulin response which you do not want to do. You want a steady slow release of sugars to keep your energy up and cravings down. Carbs coming from lentils, legumes, veggies are your friends. There are great links that list all the slow releasing carbs I do not have room here to list them all.Get good fats into you, nuts are great for that as well as olive oil, macadamia nut oil and fish. I highly recommend getting omega 3s into you as well as salmon and tuna, all great foods.

3) Every meal should be a carb and protein, it will satiate your apetite longer and keep the body happy. However with that said I gun for at least 3 servings of veggies a day, spinach, broccoli, green peppers, mushrooms (this is a fantastic one especially for women but make sure they are cooked for the max vitamin D)

4) Snacks, get almonds into here as well as peanuts and pumpkin seeds, the pumpkin seeds have many benefits including a positive libido hit. Flax seed is also fantastic I recommend getting that into your shake in its ground form or into an omelet.

5) teas or coffees, get cinammon or honey into them if you need sweeteners both are far better choices than creamers (these can contain some deadly crap in them that I would not dare let pass my lips) honey has huge health benefits and cinammon is a natural blood sugar stabilizer just do not exceed 1.5 tsps/day.

6) go for quality not quantity in the diet, remember feeding muscles requires that you keep an excess of protein, good fats, and vitamins in the body, building muscle needs even more of the basic building blocks. Eating to few cals makes it turn on itself for these needs which you want to avoid at all costs and is the sole downfall of 90% of the diets out there, they deprive the body I want you to feed it and do it right.

Clean eating, I made no secret of the fact that I advocate it, it has all the building blocks needed for a healthy body even without exercise, consider exercise to be the icing on the cake. It will help you improve upon the basic building blocks you have and if you built a strong foundation the rest of it will be strong. So get that into your head that to succeed you must feed the body.

Helpful links that I use regularly;

http://www.beachbody.com/category/michis_ladder.do

eating off the top 2 tiers makes you a saint so long as 80% of the diet is in there then the last 20% will not hurt you, do not treat that as a licence to go nuts though but I highly recommend splurging once every 3 weeks unless you have hit a wall in that case do it once every 2 weeks.

http://fourhourbodysupplements.com/2010/02/slow-carb-diet/list-of-slow-carb-foods/

list of slow carbs for you to resort to.

http://www.dietandfitnesstoday.com/body-fat-percentage-calculator.php

bodyfat calculator, get it into your head that the scale is not the way to track fat loss measurements are. The scale is the greasy car salesman of the weight loss world, it only tells you half the story. If I had to recommend one thing to do when you start its take measurements and a before pic. I recently replied to a post about eating your exercise cals I think it may be beneficial to those who are unsure about eating back the workout cals.

think of it like driving a car, you have a limited amount of gas before the car starts to break down. The calories or fuel that mfp gives you will get you to your destination driving at 80 mph. Now think of exercise as getting you there at 120 mph but not stopping for fuel means that the tires get worn down faster, the car will break down easier and in the end will explode. The body is the car, the calories are the fuel, the tires are your muscle without proper fuel they break down and in the end the body feeds off itself. The point of the exercise is to increase the metabolic rate (the speed at which you can safely drive) not to burn off the fuel (calories)

petithamu

Muscle does weight more than fat.... a better guage might be to get a body fat caliper (they're super cheap).

(I'm from Fort Bragg/Willits!! Small world!)

Sorry...I didn't really have anything to add cuz everyone already said what I wanted to say...I just got excited cuz I'm from Ukiah!! I live in London now but I get excited when I meet people from Mendo! Sorry to barge in..

jessemerson86

Just 1 year ago I was at 128 (I am 5'7") and now I am at 138... a good 10 lb gain. I am 41 years old (maybe that has something to do with this??)

Your BMI is in the really healthy range, so I'm confused as to why you want to lose 10lbs. With your age and the fact that you said you feel leaner, I think you're doing great. Just using some different BMI calculators online I feel like if you lose 10lbs you'll be underweight. I am no expert, but I'd focus more on toning than losing weight since your BMI is already pretty much the ideal.

Paddyrabbit

I've been here for more than about 18 months, and lost NOTHING by logging certainly during the first year. I did wonder about the formula that what we eat minus exercise determines weight loss or weight gain. I know it makes sense, but there are so many variables (eg..matabolic rate, precise logging) that I think it can fool us into believing that more exercise means weight loss.
I stopped logging my food about a year ago, but I keep logging my exercise.........and I lost about 12 pounds in the past six months. Admittedly, my exercise has been very regular, but at least I know now that if I want i can eat MORE and exercise more, and still be where I want to be.
Many have mentioned that muscle weighs more than fat. True. Muscle is also much more healthy than carrying fat, so do not be deterred by this fact.

shaunshaikh

Why do you care about the number on the scale if you look and feel great?

LisaKyle11

hi there!

love the fact that you are from Ukiah! i liked there for 3.5 years before moving out here to the coast. at times (especially weather times like these!) i really miss being inland a bit.

thanks for barging! enjoy London! :-)

LisaKyle11

Thanks so much to all of you for your thoughtful posts and advice! I am surely not going to abandon this community now (now I need to be sure not to abandon myself in this process!). Yes, there are so many days when it is literally almost impossible to feed myself correctly... it turns out to be all about the kids and their meals, etc... Protein shakes are a great idea. I will definitely start my mornings with one once in a while. I am sure that I should start lifting weights... although it is not something I look forward to. I try to keep my exercise in it's most 'natural form'. I know that may sound funny, but I really relate to the idea of walking/hiking and doing strength/flexibility training such as yoga (and it's many practices)...but being in a gym setting or just using dumbbells at home is not appealing to me. It sounds like I should working on my mind-set though.

I will also check out some body fat calculators for reference. Believe me, I would love to leave the scale behind! If not for me, then for my 4 daughters!! I need to continue to walk a thin line with girls because I clearly don't want them to develop body image issues as a result of their Mom becoming seemingly obsessed with calculating every last calorie! :-0

Ok, again, thank you all so much. I will post any progress!

~Lisa