Motivation and how much do we tell?

MsMe79

So I've started this life style change and sometimes I find the thought of losing 147pounds or 67kgs (I'm from Australia) is very daunting. I can't see the end result and that is frustrating.

I know what I'm doing is for me, my health and my life, but it gets frustrating.

Also, for those with partners, do you tell them your weight? Is it a way of being accountable for your actions? My partner is the most amazing person ever for me, and he doesn't judge me and loves me for me, but he knows how important losing weight is... it's just hard to tell him my weight when he weighs only 176pound (80kgs) which is good and healthy for him.

Just thought I'd get feedback from those who have been in my situation.

Thanks :happy:

jen1516

Do only what is comfortable to you. If you don't want to tell your partner your weight then don't but you may feel more comfortable doing so here. I have no one to hold me accountable which is why I'm making friends on here. They can feel free to view my diary and jump on my case (nicely) when I need it. This is a great place to meet friends who will keep you motivated. Welcome and good luck to you.

MsMe79

Thanks Jen... I love him dearly, and I for me, maybe to hit the bottom so to speak I need to be honest with him. He's never had a weight problem so doesn't truely understand which is why I joined here to get that support that he just doesn't know how to give which of course isn't his fault.

arrggghhhh I think I will tell him, he loves me regardless, and I need to put things up around the house to keep motivated and I don't want to hide anything from him.

But the motivation from here is great too. He is very supportive of this site so that is a plus for me too

Painten

I have about 150lbs to lose. I didn't tell anyone how much i weighed and didn't tell my oh till just recently. I felt i needed to tel him as i really needed his help to stick to healthy eating. He has a terrible sweet tooth and is always eating sweets and chocolate and biscuits. I just said i can't have chocolate and such in the house as i just can't leave it. I really needed him to make the effort to not keep buying it or putting it in the trolley when shopping. When i told him he said i'd been so secretive he thought i must weigh 30 stone or something *lol* He's not deliberately cruel he's just an idiot. 30 stone pffft i could have beat him to death with a saucepan.

MsMe79

Awww aren't men just so stupid sometimes!!! :laugh:

I think I need to tell him for me, as I'm kind of like you, he is a real sweet tooth and need him to not talk about sweet stuff, as until I met him I never ate sweets after dinner!!

But you're right, I do need him to make sure he is making an effort, even though he is 100% supportive, sometimes he forgets.

I hope I don't have to hit him with a saucepan when I tell him!

JohnnyNull

Yes, yes we are.

As said above, only as much as you're comfortable with. But to me, a loving couple is open and honest with each other. We have seen each other and supported each other when we've been at our respective lowest.

We all have our different challenges.

Xandi

I struggled with this as well,
I gained a bunch of weight after we got together and even more after we quit smoking.
I need him to be supportive!
I don't talk weight with him, I just talk goals.

Mamapengu

I've been honest, just don't bring up specifics all the time. We are the same height and when we got together it was no big deal for me to pull on his pants by accident. But, 10 years at a desk job and him going back to running put him at under 135 and me fighting to stay under 170... He also does the shopping and picks up treats for me because he knows I like certain foods (chips and chocolate). With his encouragement I started to exercise more and tried to eat better. I lost maybe 5-8 pounds over a year and a half, but the bag of treats he kept filled next to my desk did not help. Now I tell him when I reach a milestone (recently I got under 150 for the first time in 8 or so years, but I really don't share more than that. He's fine with me and suggested that I'm too worried about it and maybe this is my new normal. I do send him to the store with my lists and he now buys treats he knows won't temp me (as much) and all my produce and whole grain foods. He even heard about a new healthy store opening near by, so made a special trip with the family to check it out. The other day he encouraged me to go for a run in the rain 'go burn some calories.' So, it's slow but they do get there. I've seen coming here is much better for day to day, moment by moment encouragement.

MsMe79

Yes, yes we are.

As said above, only as much as you're comfortable with. But to me, a loving couple is open and honest with each other. We have seen each other and supported each other when we've been at our respective lowest.

We all have our different challenges.

I didn't mean that in a bad way, just so you know, and hoping you took it in the jest it was written

We've discussed it, and the way I'm putting up a chart on our fridge so I can track it, so he will see it, but we won't really "talk" about my weight as I'm not that comfortable but I also know, and he told me again today, that he loves me for me and not what I weigh.

I'm having a great positive day and everything finally seems to be falling into place for me

JohnnyNull

I took in partially in jest, and partially as fact, as sometimes we can be. Although, I assumed you were in kidding-girl-talk mode. ;-)