World's Funniest Email

girlruns
girlruns Posts: 344
edited September 25 in Chit-Chat
It's always fun when you look like a doofus while you laugh at your desk...

SO FUNNY…
Dear Noah,
We could have sworn you said the ark wasn't leaving till 5.
Sincerely,
Unicorns

Dear Twilight fans,
Please realize that because vampires are dead and have no blood pumping through them, they can never get an erection.
Enjoy fantasizing about that.
Sincerely,
Logic

Dear Icebergs,
Sorry to hear about the global warming. Karma's a *****.
Sincerely,
The Titanic

Dear J.K. Rowling,
Your books are entirely unrealistic.. I mean, a ginger kid with two friends?
Sincerely,
Anonymous

Dear America,
You produced Miley Cyrus. Bieber is your punishment.
Sincerely,
Canada

Dear Yahoo,
I've never heard anyone say, "I don't know, let's Yahoo! it..." just saying...
Sincerely,
Google

Dear 2010,
So I hear the best rapper is white and the president is black? WTF happened?!
Sincerely,
1985

Dear Windshield Wipers,
Can't touch this.
Sincerely,
That Little Triangle

Dear Rose,
There was definitely room on that Door for the both of us.
Sincerely,
Jack
PS, you let go

Dear girls who have been dumped,
There are plenty of fish in the sea... Just kidding! They're all dead.
Sincerely,
BP

Dear Saturn,
I liked it, so I put a ring on it.
Sincerely,
God

Dear Fox News,
So far, no news about foxes.
Sincerely,
Unimpre ss ed

Dear jf;ldsfa/kvsmmklnn,
Please lknvfdmv.xvn.
Sincerely, Stevie Wonder

Dear Nickleback,
That's enough.
Sincerely, The World

Dear Skin-Colored Band Aids,
Please make one for every skin color.
Sincerely, Black people

Dear Sci ss ors,
I feel your pain.....no one wants to run with me either.
Sincerely, Sarah Palin

Dear Osama Bin Laden,
Marco....
Sincerely, United States

Dear World of Warcraft,
Thank you for ensuring my son's virginity.
Sincerely, Parents Everywhere

Dear Anne Frank,
Two can play this game....
Sincerely, Waldo

Dear Batman,
What was your power again?
Sincerely, Superman

Dear Customers,
Yes, we ARE making fun of you in Vietnamese.
Sincerely, Nail Salon Ladies

Dear Global Warming,
You're the best imaginary friend ever!
Sincerely, Al Gore

Dear Ugly People,
You're welcome.
Sincerely, Alcohol

Dear Mr. Gump
WTF are you talking about? There's a little diagram on the lid that tells you EXACTLY what you're gonna get....
Sincerely, Jenny

Dear Katy Perry,
I liked the kiss too.
Sincerely, Justin Beiber

Dear Haiti,
Is it too early to ask what's shakin'?
Sincerely,
Seriously Going To Hell

Dear Martin Luther King Jr.
I have a dream within a dream within a dream within another dream.... What now?
Sincerely,
Leonardo Di Caprio

Dear World,
Please stop freaking out about 2012. Our calendars ends there because some Spanish d-bags invaded our country and we got a little busy ok?
Sincerely,
The Mayans

Dear Snooki,
GET BACK TO WORK!
Sincerely,
Willy Wonka

Dear White People,
Don't you just hate immigrants?
Sincerely,
Native Americans

Dear iPhone,
Please stop spellchecking all of my rude words into nice words. You piece of shut.
Sincerely,
Every iPhone User

Dear Giant Spider on the Wall,
Please die. Please die. Please die. Please die. CRAP! Where did you go?
Sincerely,
Terrified

Dear Trash,
At least you get picked up...
Sincerely,
The Girls of Jersey Shore

Dear Man,
It's cute, but can you pick up peanuts with it?
Sincerely,
Elephant

Dear Dr. Phil,
Look man, there's only room for one fake doctor in this world and I was here first.
Sincerely,
Dr. Pepper
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Replies

  • BrendaBlis
    BrendaBlis Posts: 165 Member
    Awesome!!
  • LOL!
  • brendansmom1
    brendansmom1 Posts: 526 Member
    Oh my gosh, this is so wrong in so many ways....but so stinkin' funny!!!!

    Why is that? Oh my, we are all going to hell. LOL
  • chris0912
    chris0912 Posts: 242 Member

    Dear Twilight fans,
    Please realize that because vampires are dead and have no blood pumping through them, they can never get an erection.
    Enjoy fantasizing about that.
    Sincerely,
    Logic

    Dear J.K. Rowling,
    Your books are entirely unrealistic.. I mean, a ginger kid with two friends?
    Sincerely,
    Anonymous

    Hubby and I love these books so we had quite a giggle!
  • vitosbud
    vitosbud Posts: 54 Member
    Thank you, thank you, thank you.... that made my afternoon :)
  • Shannon023
    Shannon023 Posts: 14,529 Member
    Dear jf;ldsfa/kvsmmklnn,
    Please lknvfdmv.xvn.
    Sincerely, Stevie Wonder

    *******************************************************************************************************

    bwahahahaha!!! :laugh:
  • abra526
    abra526 Posts: 213 Member
    I needed that pick me up today! Thanks!
  • I liked that. Thanks for posting.
  • Kityngirl
    Kityngirl Posts: 14,304 Member
    :laugh:
  • SheilaSisco
    SheilaSisco Posts: 722 Member
    LMBO!!!! This was GREAT!!! And I really needed a laugh today... Thank you!!!!
  • Jessica_Lo
    Jessica_Lo Posts: 199 Member
    OMG those were fantastic!!! lol
  • YeahMe
    YeahMe Posts: 35 Member
    Too Funny! Thanks for sharing.
  • reese66
    reese66 Posts: 2,920 Member
    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • Moonbeamlissie
    Moonbeamlissie Posts: 504 Member
    I enjoyed this very much! Thanks for posting!!!
  • fitmom4ever
    fitmom4ever Posts: 130
    Thanks. I really needed to laugh this week.
  • mommared53
    mommared53 Posts: 9,543 Member
    Oh my word, those are so funny!!!! :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • SweetToothMelissa
    SweetToothMelissa Posts: 137 Member
    LMAO. Thanks for posting. hilarious!!
  • ebgbjo
    ebgbjo Posts: 821 Member
    lmao... loved all of them, especially this

    "Dear Rose,
    There was definitely room on that Door for the both of us.
    Sincerely,
    Jack
    PS, you let go
    "
  • Evjones28
    Evjones28 Posts: 70
    LOL ... Hilarious, i was trying to see which one was my favorite. I couldn't ... i like them all !!! :laugh:
  • Xandi
    Xandi Posts: 319
    That was fun!!!
    a Little bit for everyone!!!
  • skinnyhopes
    skinnyhopes Posts: 402 Member
    These are fun to read.
  • LuckyLeprechaun
    LuckyLeprechaun Posts: 6,296 Member
    oh gosh, thank you so much
  • Jon_Rod
    Jon_Rod Posts: 158
    Im at my desk and laughing.....HHAHAHAHAHAHHA SOOOOOOOOO FUNNY
  • Liatush
    Liatush Posts: 627 Member
    Love it :)
  • 2406sanu
    2406sanu Posts: 3
    :D Really funny! :D
  • kuhristeee
    kuhristeee Posts: 100 Member
    BUUUUMP! OMG these are so great!
  • I love these....
  • MrsMills712
    MrsMills712 Posts: 350
    So funny! :) I had to keep reading them to my hubby in the other room. Thanks for the laugh.
  • sbrake
    sbrake Posts: 25
    love it
  • TDGee
    TDGee Posts: 2,209 Member
    LOVING THIS!!
This discussion has been closed.