Feeling very negative...beware

saralind21

So I gained 5 pounds recently, maybe more now because I haven't weighed myself in awhile. Anyway, thats the problem with me. If I have one bad day it turns into a week,and than a month. Gaining one pound turns into 5 and than 10. And now I am probably only 5 pounds away from going back to my original weight. All that work to lose 15 pounds down the drain!! And it makes me not even want to go on my trip in December anymore. Being so fat is going to ruin the whole thing!! I really just want to quit all together right now. Every weight loss in my life has only been successful for a little while. I always end up gaining it back. Thats why it is discouraging to even try to become healthier...I can never stick to it. Are there any other yo-yo dieters out there? If so, have you ever been able to maintain a weight loss? It feels impossible.

saralind21

So I gained 5 pounds recently, maybe more now because I haven't weighed myself in awhile. Anyway, thats the problem with me. If I have one bad day it turns into a week,and than a month. Gaining one pound turns into 5 and than 10. And now I am probably only 5 pounds away from going back to my original weight. All that work to lose 15 pounds down the drain!! And it makes me not even want to go on my trip in December anymore. Being so fat is going to ruin the whole thing!! I really just want to quit all together right now. Every weight loss in my life has only been successful for a little while. I always end up gaining it back. Thats why it is discouraging to even try to become healthier...I can never stick to it. Are there any other yo-yo dieters out there? If so, have you ever been able to maintain a weight loss? It feels impossible.

tdroseler

yo yo dieting is very common, thats for sure. there are enough companies out there getting rich to prove it.

Have you asked yourself why you give up? why you are only sucessfull for a little while.

I did some really heavy thinking recently, and discovered that i, in the past have sabatoged myself cause i was afraid of what would happen if i succeeded. Sounds crazy doesn't it. But think about it.

Most of us that have a weight problem, have had it all our lives. It is all we know...what the heck would we do without it? Some of us have used weight to disguise, or cover up a problem, insecurities, or whatever else. It is like wearing a mask...being something that is expected of us, it's easier than becoming what we want to be. When we actually loose the weight, then what. We have no more mask. Different things may be expected of us. Suddenly we are uncovered, and shown for who we really are. Im still trying to figure out who and what i really am.

I have decided that this time, i want to know "my better half". I have no idea what my life will be like when i loose all the weight i wish to loose, but i want to find out. I have decided that it cannot be as scary as the thought that i have given control of my life to food, and my weight. I have let my fat dictate everything. I have a heart, i have a brain, i have a soul, and im gonna prove it.

Im not saying this is your difficulty, but ask yourself, why do you want to stay the way you are? Is it possible that somewhere in you is the need to be this way? Is that why you haven't been able to win the fight...yet?

I read somewhere....you can't have a change without having a change within.

hope this helps

borjanap

You have to also remember that it's supposed to be a lifestyle change. I know that every single time I lost weight I would just go back to my old habits and think that everything is ok, but it's not ok.( "If you do what you always did, you will get what you always want!"My favorite quote. )Once you lose the weight you have to change your thinking as well. Just make sure you stay within your calorie allotment per day adn you should be perfectly fine.
As for the trip. Girl, those things are once in a while opportunities, and you should definitely enjoy them no matter how you feel.

icandoit

saralind21

I know what you mean. I have been there, done that. Yes, it is frustrating, but, you can do it. A lifestyle change doesn't happen over night. You need to make little changes everyday. I find myself in front of my computer on this site when I have free time. It really helps me to take my mind off of food. I also have a disgusting picture of myself hanging on the fridge and the pantry door, and I have inspirational quotes posted. It really helps me. Do you have a friend near by that needs to make a lifestyle change too. You guys can call each other daily and give eat other the pep talk that may be needed.
We are all here for you too. Don't give up. You can do this. It will take time, but you will succeed. Look for the post a little something that helps me. I will pull it back to the top. Read the quotes. Maybe it will help you out.
Good luck to you, and remember-
YOU CAN DO THIS:happy: :happy: :flowerforyou: :happy: :happy: :flowerforyou: :happy:

diannholland1965

I think that EVERYONE on the board has been there. If there is one who is not a Yo Yo dieter among us. Please stand up and give us your will power!
That being said.
As one who, Like you, have the goal as a trip... DO NOT STAY HOME!!!
I do not know if this works for others but I sometimes scare myself back to eating right.
One: If I gain a few LBs I put on the bikini that I am wareing on the sailboat. and I FORCE myself to stand in front of the mirror and see what it looks like.
Two: Fat causes wrinkles...Well, Not exactly, KINDA, IN A WAY, but not all by it's self. But I tell myself that so that I will be sure not to eat that extra cookie. And being 25 with 18 years of experiance, Wrinkles are in the forefront of my mind.
Three: I remind myself everyday...One more step closer to the boat, One more glass of water closer to casting off, One more veggie platter closer to the Carib. Etc.
These things keep the goal fresh in my mind. Each thing I do is a reminder of how I would like to look on the trip. If I make it to my goal GREAT! if I fall short, OH WELL I AM STILL IN THE CARIB!
That being said. LADIES! Why are we so HARD on ourselves? Is it the power of Media wanting us to be stick thin or we think we just do not look good? Is it some man in our life that told us we where fat and we belived him? (Mind you all men are not that way.) Was it a Teacher,Coach, Crush, Someone of influence that we let drag ourselves so far down that we have trouble looking up?
Men do not have these troubles? Why is that I wonder? When they get down about the weight issue, they go work out, when we do, we act like one day ruined our lives and eat until it IS worse.
We HAVE to STOP THIS! :frown:
Now that I am off my soap box...You are going to be fine. Chin up Sis, you will be grand! :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:
--Diann...

filergirl

Saralind,

What you are experiencing sounds similar to what I went through this past weekend. I got on the scale and realized I had gained a bit of weight since the previous week -- only a few pounds, but enough to really discourage me. I felt totally disgusted with myself; I almost let it ruin my plans for the weekend because I just wanted to hide. I tend to do this with lots of things in my life; one thing goes wrong and then suddenly it all starts snowballing and I'm a total failure, I can't do anything right, etc. Logically, I know none of this is true, but emotions can be like a wave; they slam into you, overwhelm you, and then you're struggling to get your head back above water. The energy expended in this struggle against yourself can make you feel even more hopeless and can feed the overall level of negativity.

The only thing I have found to help in this situation is to go somewhere where I am completely alone, close my eyes, and focus hard on what I know to be true. For example, I know I am a good person, I have made valuable contributions to other people's lives, I am going to continue to do that, *despite* temporary setbacks. My mistakes are not the sum of who I am. I try to block out all external sources of validation. For a few minutes I make my best effort to not think about what other people are thinking or how they will think of me. It's really hard, because my brain keeps defaulting to the old negative patterns of thinking. I've found that the more I've done this, the easier it's gotten -- that right thinking is a learned habit as much as wrong thinking is.

You don't have to let these emotions destroy what could be a great vacation for YOU (keyword, for "you" -- not for other people and what they think of you). Other people can't know your struggles or what's in your heart, so you need to feel good about your achievements so far. Gaining the weight back does *not* negate the self-discipline you exhibited or in anyway deplete those internal resources. You've still got it, and you've proven that you have it! Nothing can take that away from you.

saralind21

Thank you everyone for taking the time to try and make me feel better! It really helps : )

Its amazing the difference a day can make. Today I am eating healthy and I have taken a walk. I feel great! I am going to take it day at a time, thats all I can do

Cheers :drinker:

icandoit

That is great. Glad to hear you are back on track. It is really a day by day change. We have our ups and we have our downs. As long as we get back on our feet, it will be OK. Keep it up.