Kids and Diets? Yes or No

trejon

:mad: My pediatrician told me that my four year old needed to lose weight :devil: . She is tall for her age (125%) and weighs about 52 pounds. I was upset this being that she is so young and active. She does not look plump in any way - just athletic! Now she does have what I call a big butt for a kiddo and that too cute belly - that is hard. We eat healthy in our house except once a week. I do not feel that a 4 year old should be on a diet :explode: . Am I wrong in this?

marm1962

I am not expressing an opinion either way......Us moms can be very protective and perhaps blind to our children's shortcomings........but if you disagree with your doctor a second opinion might be in order. Doctors are not always right.

Hanna82

As a parent I would feel mortified to hear that news. We always want to stand up for and protect our children and for someone to say they need to diet would infuriate me. However, the only thing you can do is take the advice given and make it your own. If you feel that your child is active and provided with a healthy balanced diet then who is anyone else to say what is normal for them. You know your child. That's all I can really say.

Angierae75

With a child that age I wouldn't think "diet" really, but just making sure they're more active - lots of opportunity for running around, playing outside, etc. If they are drinking soda, cut that out (they shouldn't be anyway), watch juices, etc.

Heck, DD16 just lost 8 pounds without noticing because DH and I are eating more healthy and there's less junk in the house so she's not eating it. :P

mommytomia

My Dr told me about 4 years ago that my daughter was borderline overweight.
It upset me so much.
I look at her now and she has naturally slimmed out so much between age 4 and 8 that my doc never again has said a word.
Maybe just be very aware and work on snacking and portion size..
otherwise, no diet!!!

crjugrl

I'm no doctor, but even if I were, your the mother. What you feed your child is your decision and if she's healthy and active then then her diet is up to your discretion. If she's not over-eating, not eating an excess of junk food, and at least has an understanding of what's healthy and what isn't, I don't see a need for worry at all. I just think doctors are paying so much more attention to this sort of thing because of all the attention on childhood obesity lately.

Dreamerlove

Oh dear!!! I am not a mom (YET) but I do have that momma gene as a women. I don't know what I would do, I would feed them obviously healthy foods and probably mindlessly have them on a good amount of calories.

It seems you are doing that. I would get a second opinion and most diffidently not let her hear the doctor say that. For fear of her having self esteem issues. It makes me sad to see kids overweight, but EVERY child has a chubby stage..hint "baby fat". I guess he is trying to prevent the next generation from becoming obese but idk.

As long as she is happy and normally active, I would mindlessly keep her on a average calorie goal and healthy foods...

greeneyed84

I wouldn't mind it, putting a kid on a diet is NOT the way to go. It will stay with them forever and then they might grow up with an eating disorder...... Maybe you can just switch out a few unhealthy things for healthier things? For example if you give 3 cups of juice a day reduce it down to 1.... etc.

ceejay000

:mad: My pediatrician told me that my four year old needed to lose weight :devil: . She is tall for her age (125%) and weighs about 52 pounds. I was upset this being that she is so young and active. She does not look plump in any way - just athletic! Now she does have what I call a big butt for a kiddo and that too cute belly - that is hard. We eat healthy in our house except once a week. I do not feel that a 4 year old should be on a diet :explode: . Am I wrong in this?

First I want to say that i do not know your child, and everyone is different. However, I do know that when kids are overweight, they often initially grow taller from the extra calories, so they don't appear to be "fat." Eventually this will stop, though, and they'll start growing wider. Not saying this is the case with your daughter, but that's what happens to a lot of kids.

You don't have to put your daughter on a "diet," and she certainly doesn't need to know if you're trying to cut her caloric intake, but did the doctor give you any suggestions for what to do? Sometimes just smaller portion sizes will help.

spcopps

A friend of mine was told the same thing when her son was 6..now keep in mind he is BIG I would say borderline obese for his age. After trying it for about a week she caved because he would literally sit at the table and CRY for more food. Saying this, before I made a drastic change I would get a 2nd opinion. At age 4 they need so many vitamins to grow properly I would see a 2nd pedi and I would tell them what my first pedi said and if they recommend weight loss I would ASK about seeing a nutritionist before trying this on my own. A child's health isn't something to play with and not getting the right vitamins/nutrients while still growing could have life long consequences. JMO

godblessourhome

I am not expressing an opinion either way......Us moms can be very protective and perhaps blind to our children's shortcomings.

so true. many of my mommy friends have 'heftier' kids with the chubby tummy, and are beyond mad when their doctor mentions anything about them restricting the child's diet. yet those same moms will comment on how sad it is that the elementary kids are overweight. i call it selective vision.

hinesjared87

you guys are overlooking the fact that this guy is a childrens doctor. he's not trying to change the world, he's just making a suggestion that you should watch what your kid eats. i have no idea what you're doing, i assume you probably watch it to some extent, but if you don't take steps now you're going to instill a lifestyle of whatever she's doing. she is after all in her formative years, and i'm sure you don't, but making her believe her big belly and butt are cute would really be detrimental to your daughter's entire life.
a second opinion, as everyone seems to be suggesting wouldn't hurt, but there's probably some merit in what the doctor told you.

hinesjared87

A friend of mine was told the same thing when her son was 6..now keep in mind he is BIG I would say borderline obese for his age. After trying it for about a week she caved because he would literally sit at the table and CRY for more food.

these kind of people make me sick. aside from dieting, this lady is ruining her son for life.

trejon

Hummmmmmmmm! No member of my team is at their BMI. Muscle weighs more than fat. I wish I could post her photo but due to there being "NUT Cases" out there I cannot. My kid is not PLUMP in any way form or fashion. She has a belly and muscles - SOLID. Her body is made of fresh fruit and veggie and limited junk, no sodas, no candy, and once a week treats. She asks for fruit before chips and candy. I really do not know what other I can do besides giving her two bites of each foods on her plate and that is NOT gonna happen.

spcopps

A friend of mine was told the same thing when her son was 6..now keep in mind he is BIG I would say borderline obese for his age. After trying it for about a week she caved because he would literally sit at the table and CRY for more food.

these kind of people make me sick. aside from dieting, this lady is ruining her son for life.

I agree it could potentially ruin his life, not just socially but also health wise, but I am not sure how I would respond to my child sitting at the table CRYING for more dinner and I don't think she should be judged on her decision. It's not like she was giving him sweets, she removed ALL of those from the house. He was begging for more healthy foods because he was still hungry. This is why I said I would consult with a nutritionist, they could help with determining the right amount of food and ways to make it LESS stressful for both parent and child.

iac368

Hi trejon
Be encouraged! Just keep in mind that Webster’s defines the word diet is “a regular eating regimen”. You are not headed down a dark path of restrictions and limitations by monitoring your daughter’s ‘eating regimen’. We all are on a diet when we purchase our weekly grocery supplies. There is a billion dollar industry that makes money off our desires, but you are on this site and that illustrates that you have a different mindset. My family and I are nutritionally aware however we are aware of our ethnic genetics. We seek a qualitative life by developing healthy lifestyles consider that’s all you’re being asked to reinforce. You can handle this! My younger babies are 16 and 14. The youngest is a slender male and my 16 year old daughter is turning into a woman right in front of me. Both of them are trained by our “regular eating regimen”. Consider giving your pediatrician the benefit of the doubt and see what you can do and monitor the results. Who knows, tweaking her nutrition now can turn into a blessing.

liveinbliss

Just be a good example of what to eat and how to be active...teaching her to "diet" at this age is appalling and would probably set her up for a life long battle with her body. While I do believe childhood obesity is a problem many kids go up and down with their weight as they age and it's just a growth pattern...not obesity. My kids always grow "out" before they grow "up". My husband I will joke that one or the other must be getting ready for a growth spurt because they have started looking pudgey. Sure enough before you know they have grown a couple inches and the pudge is gone. Good luck with your journey!

knittnponder

While I don't agree with putting a child on a "diet" I do think that teaching them good eating habits (carefully) is a good thing. I have four kids and they've been through many changes of eating habits with me as I've learned new things. We've transitioned away from processed foods and are at the point where we mill all our own flour and make our bread and baked goods. I have one kid who is a peanut butter addict! With her I don't tell her she'll get fat if she eats too much peanut butter. Instead I tell her to look at the serving size on the jar and use the scale to measure out that amount. This way she's not deprived of something she loves but hopefully she's learning moderation and how to have a little self control.

A four year old isn't really going to be able to do much of that for herself yet so you'll need to be the regulator until she's old enough. But at about five years old my son was reading labels and knew what to look for as far as what we avoid and what I'm looking for in food (high fiber, high protein, etc)

Can I make a suggestion to you? Quietly track your daughter's food for a week or so. This will give you a realistic picture of what and how much she's eating. Often people sign up for MFP and then exclaim that they had no idea how much and what they had actually been eating. It could be the same for your daughter or she may be eating totally healthy but if you track for a few days you'll know for sure. I do think she'll likely slim down as she grows and she may be in one of those stages where they store fat right before they sprout up several inches.

You are mom and you know your DD best and are her best advocate. Teaching healthy eating is far different than putting a four year old on a diet! (Sorry if I rambled all over! I'm getting sleepy.)

jsmith2377

I once read an article that was quite interesting and a woman talked about having a similar conversation with her daughter's ped. The doctor showed concern for the child's weight and while the child was still within normal ranges, the rate in which the child was moving up the growth charts from year to year was alarming. The doctor explained it very well by saying that while she was normal now, with her more rapid than normal weight gain, by the time she was 12 she would be considered obese.
Once they are overweight or obese, it is more difficult to lose the weight and certainly at 12 those habits will be nearly impossible to break.
Something to consider. Not neccesarily a weight loss regimen but more of a health overhaul.

noltes2

Some kids have naturally bigger frames, as do some adults. You said it yourself - you feed her very healthy foods and she is solid muscle. I was always a bit bigger (not chubby, not rolls of fat, just wider hips and shoulders) and I ate a pretty balanced diet and was active. My parents were always down on me about my weight because i was NEVER thin even at 4 years old... I went on my first diet when I was 7. Pretty much screwed me up for life and when I lost 15 pounds when I was 14 they praised me for "finally growing out of my baby fat" and the day had finally come... except it was not baby fat, I lost it by starving myself, then gained it back later!

Anyways, your daughter is 4 and you are already teaching her a healthy lifestyle, as you said. She will grow taller, or maybe she just has that kind of frame.

suzycreamcheese

if shes eating properly, decent food and being active, then screw what the doctor thinks.
Theres no reason to give a 4 year old issues about food.

My cousins daughter was really chubby as a small child and now shes 8 or 9 and not chubby because her mum put her on a bloody diet. Everything the little girl eats her mum says "are you sure you need that" " i think youve eaten enough already" etc, that sort of thing, and it breaks my heart. My cousin has always had issues with her weight herself, and im sure shes projecting her fear of regaining weight herself, onto her daughter, and id be bloody surprised if the little girl didnt end up with an ED.


I think sometimes it goes too far, and a child is obviously too big, but there are ways of dealing with that without making a child aware, or just on the premise of becoming healthier, without talking about weight.
Other times you get doctors who are absolutely obsessed with children being on the 50th centile for everything. Oh your child is bigger than average, put him on a diet. or your child is smaller than average, feed him more.
i dont think it does anyone any favours.

If you really dont think theres a problem, then listen to your instincts, as long as youre not just being defensive