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excerpts from your pets diaries(so cute)

TheNewJessieMae
TheNewJessieMae Posts: 767
edited September 2024 in Chit-Chat
Excerpts from a Dog's Diary...

8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 pm - Lunch! My favorite thing!
1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 pm - Milk Bones! My favorite thing!
7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!
 
 
 

Excerpts from a cat's diary...

...Day 983 of my captivity...
 
...My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength...

...The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet...

...Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a 'good little hunter' I am. *kitten*...

...There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of 'allergies.' I must learn what this means and how to use it to my advantage...

..Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs...

...I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges.. He is regularly released - and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded...

..The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicating with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now...

Replies

  • staciekins
    staciekins Posts: 453 Member
    Haha!!! That is awesome!!!
  • Atlantique
    Atlantique Posts: 2,484 Member
    I've seen this before, but it's always funny!:laugh:
  • RajwaJ
    RajwaJ Posts: 191 Member
    Haha! That was fantastic. The different between cats and dogs heh? lol!
  • MissAnjy
    MissAnjy Posts: 2,480 Member
    hahahaha thanks for the laugh :)
  • staciekins
    staciekins Posts: 453 Member
    proof that dogs are awesome, loyal pets and cats are just evil
  • kymarai
    kymarai Posts: 3,856 Member
    Made me laugh so hard!
  • MissWait
    MissWait Posts: 160
    Bahahahahahhaaa! Soo Funny!
  • TeamLeela
    TeamLeela Posts: 3,302
    ..Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs...


    This is so funny! But this the one that I can relate to the most. There were times when I definitely thought my cat wanted me to break my neck by tripping me down the stairs! Got rid of the damn thing when I got pregnant and never looked back.
  • cdngirl71
    cdngirl71 Posts: 2,641 Member
    :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: thanks for the laugh!!!
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