Ever had the need to revist a 'Didn't happen event' if so wh

digby765

Now this is sort of fun and sort of sad, but deffinately not intended to depress you :happy:

So what gave me the idea was a person close to me , who had never as a young girl had a birthday party, you know the ballons, jelly and cake variety...she was so chuffed to have finally had one this year, even tho she's a mum and a gran herself now... My point is it's often very healing to have such an experience.

Anyone else had this experience, or would like to have as a adult something they never had/experienced as a child?

SandyLee1961

Though I did not have an "unhappy" childhood, my mother made sure of that...I did have an alcoholic father. Because of this, a lot of times when I was younger (under 8) my birthday parties were not something positive. When I got older, I didn't WANT parties because I was afraid that my father would get drunk and make an idiot out of himself. Due to this, now, as an "almost" 50 - birthdays are VERY important to me. My husband had the hardest time understanding this for a very long time,. He did get it though and now understands that celebrating my birthday is very important to me. I may not want a party, but I DO want a fuss made out of me. And my children? I make sure their birthdays are super special.

justleeanne

I was in a childrens home when I was younger and despite asking for a barbie every christmas and birthday I never got one and the other girls would never let me play with theirs or if they did they were the old cast offs with no clothes and one arm, drawn all over, hair cut and that kind of thing.

It was something I always talked about as a teenager, it obviously really affected me!

My adoptive mum who is the most amazing person in the whole wide world to me bought me one for my 18th birthday and even though I didn't want to play with a barbie anymore it made me feel so loved and special.

It may sound ridiculous to somebody else but it actually was a really healing experience!

SandyLee1961

I SO understand that For my 30th, I was asked what I wanted. My reply "A Bride Barbie Doll." I wanted one so badly when I was a kid and never got one. I still have her too!

digby765

One of mine was a soft cuddly teddy bear, every year i got horrid 'nobody' plastic dolls, my ex bought me a teddy bear but not a soft cuddly one, so i bought one for myself some years ago, and made sure my kids had soft bears too...

But the main one for me was not being read a bedtime story, it just wasn't on my parents radar (I don't hold it against them, I'm one of 9) and so it just didn't happen, I now often read before sleeping. I always made sure i read to my kids. Sometimes by doing for your kids what was missing for you is very healing too.

xerinx2011

I was in the care system as a child and didnt know my mum until i was 11. She was never my mum even when i met her and we started a relationship. All throughout my teens i craved a motherly figure. I was moved around alot when i was younger and due to that i need stability in my life. Once im settled somewhere i hate moving.

I ended up very hurt by my mother, i constantly craved her love ect and i never got it. It took me until i was 23 to see what she really was. She just goes from man to man and drops her kids like they mean anything. The last straw was when she stole £600 from me when my son was only 4 weeks old. I have never seen or spoken to her since. Its her loss not mine although its still hard when you wanna ring your mum and have a moan ect like all my mates still do. Its proven to me how different i want to be with my children however which is a bonus!!