Un Supportive Family

MrsChristinaG

@ WWE_CHICK

I think you are a really strong person to be able to pull away and just not mention it to people what your plans are. This is good because you PREVENT negative comments. I guess I really thrive on the approval of my family/friends and being told how great what I'm doing is. and because of this, it hurts me so much more when i don't get the reaction i was hoping for. My family too would tell me things like "If you don't lose weight, no man will want you" or calling me out in front of guests telling me not to eat, or that i shouldn't be eating that. regardless what it was. After losing the initial 150lbs by developing anorexit behaviors and purging anything other than salad and water for 2.5 years; my famiy forced me into eating again. they too wouldnt let me leave the table. I still struggle every day with the battle against my eating disorder. I'm trying to do this the right way, the healthy way. ad I've come to learn, that nothing i do or don't do, will ever be good enough for them.

daisy89

So, I totally understand that this is the mindset you've been raised in, but I disagree that it's inherent in our culture. I'm Mexican too, my mom was born in San Luis, Potosi, Mx. In fact, I'm the FIRST american citizen in my entire family. However, my mom never taught us to eat more than what we needed to feel full, and certainly never forced us to have seconds.

She always cooked well-balanced meals, and taught me how to eat correctly, and often took us out to the track to walk together as a family (I've got three other sisters) and talk and have fun. And, she came from a dirt-poor family too, so it's not the poverty thing.

I have also been a vegetarian since I was 13 (I'm 21 now) and my family's always supported me, no meat, no lard, no greasy foods. Heck, my mom did it for a couple of years as well.

My problem with being overweight occurred once I moved away from home and didn't have my mother's cooking anymore. Suddenly, yeah I could have a veggie pizza and coke, and dessert, and a snack later, and some energy drinks. ALL without working out. Needless to say, I put on the pounds. My mom even asked me when I would start working out again, so I'd be thin again once.

What I'm trying to say is that you shouldn't blame the culture, when it how the individuals eat. And what's really hard is changing the way we eat. You and I both now how tough that is.

Now, I am in no way trying to sound disrespectful. I'm just saying eating unhealthy is not engrained in all Mexicans.

And, I'm proud of you for changing your lifestyle. Having a parent disapprove is definitely rough. I can't imagine just how hard that is for you right now.

You can definitely add me, and we'll go through this life-style change together. =]

MrsChristinaG

So, I totally understand that this is the mindset you've been raised in, but I disagree that it's inherent in our culture. I'm Mexican too, my mom was born in San Luis, Potosi, Mx. In fact, I'm the FIRST american citizen in my entire family. However, my mom never taught us to eat more than what we needed to feel full, and certainly never forced us to have seconds.

She always cooked well-balanced meals, and taught me how to eat correctly, and often took us out to the track to walk together as a family (I've got three other sisters) and talk and have fun. And, she came from a dirt-poor family too, so it's not the poverty thing.

I have also been a vegetarian since I was 13 (I'm 21 now) and my family's always supported me, no meat, no lard, no greasy foods. Heck, my mom did it for a couple of years as well.

My problem with being overweight occurred once I moved away from home and didn't have my mother's cooking anymore. Suddenly, yeah I could have a veggie pizza and coke, and dessert, and a snack later, and some energy drinks. ALL without working out. Needless to say, I put on the pounds. My mom even asked me when I would start working out again, so I'd be thin again once.

What I'm trying to say is that you shouldn't blame the culture, when it how the individuals eat. And what's really hard is changing the way we eat. You and I both now how tough that is.

Now, I am in no way trying to sound disrespectful. I'm just saying eating unhealthy is not engrained in all Mexicans.

And, I'm proud of you for changing your lifestyle. Having a parent disapprove is definitely rough. I can't imagine just how hard that is for you right now.

You can definitely add me, and we'll go through this life-style change together. =]

you are absolutely right, I shouldn't have said it was the mexican way. maybe i thought it was this way, since both sides of my family act the same way. My dad too, is from SLP. its great that your mom has always been healthy minded, i wish I had that type of support to keep me going. It's true, but i dont understand where this food perspective comes from in my family. its just always been that way, from the very beginning. You didn't offend me at all, you've enlightened me. I never knew (because i was never exposed) that all families werent the same. I'm really glad i found this site, everyone here has been so incredibly supportive, and without even knowing eachother. its amazing what a large group of like minded people, with the same goals can do for eachother, without even seeing/meeting eachother. Thank you so much for your reply

Azuleelan

So, I totally understand that this is the mindset you've been raised in, but I disagree that it's inherent in our culture. I'm Mexican too, my mom was born in San Luis, Potosi, Mx. In fact, I'm the FIRST american citizen in my entire family. However, my mom never taught us to eat more than what we needed to feel full, and certainly never forced us to have seconds.

She always cooked well-balanced meals, and taught me how to eat correctly, and often took us out to the track to walk together as a family (I've got three other sisters) and talk and have fun. And, she came from a dirt-poor family too, so it's not the poverty thing.

I have also been a vegetarian since I was 13 (I'm 21 now) and my family's always supported me, no meat, no lard, no greasy foods. Heck, my mom did it for a couple of years as well.

My problem with being overweight occurred once I moved away from home and didn't have my mother's cooking anymore. Suddenly, yeah I could have a veggie pizza and coke, and dessert, and a snack later, and some energy drinks. ALL without working out. Needless to say, I put on the pounds. My mom even asked me when I would start working out again, so I'd be thin again once.

What I'm trying to say is that you shouldn't blame the culture, when it how the individuals eat. And what's really hard is changing the way we eat. You and I both now how tough that is.

Now, I am in no way trying to sound disrespectful. I'm just saying eating unhealthy is not engrained in all Mexicans.

And, I'm proud of you for changing your lifestyle. Having a parent disapprove is definitely rough. I can't imagine just how hard that is for you right now.

You can definitely add me, and we'll go through this life-style change together. =]

But nobody said it was inherent and even if someone did, there are always, always exceptions...

nerdyandilikeit

I'm not mexican, but my weight problems definitely started when my parents got divorced and i started visiting my dad and stepmom every other weekend. (my whole story is on my profile if you're interested) She grew up on a farm with like a million brothers and one sister, so she learned to cook for an army from her mom. She cooked like this for my brother and sister and I, and her feelings got hurt if we refused to have seconds and it would make me feel guilty. So I ate more than I needed and it's been a hard habit to break ever since. It wasn't intentional sabotage or disapproval, but I definitely understand the pressure you feel when your family doesn't understand why you don't want as much as them. Luckily, as I got older, the pressure lessened, but the food was still there and my stepmom just guilted us into taking home all the leftovers, instead (and very few of her dishes even compare to any of my actual family members' cooking!).

You have to stay strong for you, and hopefully they will understand eventually if you don't give up

Mimishadows

I'm not gonna lie i got fat because i love love love food and my mom's Cuban cooking. But thankfully i haven't had the problem you are having, then again I'm very rude to people who try to discourage me and i speak my mind. I don't care if they think I'm a B****. I'm not gonna take any of that and if they can't respect my decisions in life then they can shove it!

sjackson902

I'm so proud of you for trying as hard as you are! Changing your lifestyle for the better is really hard. I bet once your family sees what an improvement you're making in yourself they'll be appreciative of all your hard work. Keep it up!!