What the hell?!

funkyspunky871

So, I do 116 minutes of exercise today and burn 1200+ calories, and my mom starts freaking out about it. She's telling me it's anorexic behavior, and that I'm exercising too much. I exercised that long because I was on a roll, feeling good about myself... And because I was bored, and I didn't feel like letting my energy go to waste, sitting on the couch watching tv all day like I normally do. She says those are just stupid excuses though, and she will NOT listen. It'd be anorexic behavior if I were eating only 500 calories a day and exercising for almost two hours, but I'm not! I'm eating back all of my exercise calories today. If anything, she's the one who she should worry about! She eats 800 calories a day and expects to lose weight every single morning.

This is really upsetting me. I feel like I'm progressing enough to be able to workout for extended periods of time and enjoy it just like most of my MFP friends do, and yet I'm being held back. I normally workout for 20-30 minutes a day, and I've really been slacking lately, so I started up P90X. It's addicting and really fun. What can I say? I did do twice what I was supposed to do, but I think I should be the one to decide how much is too much. That being said, I'm taking a rest day tomorrow.

Ugh, what should I do? Apparently exercise = anorexia to my mother, and I'm scared she'll (god-forbid) seek treatment for me!

Bridgetc140

Tell her that there in NOTHING unhealthy about working out! Especially if you're eating back your exercise calories. Hell...some days I do a second workout just so that I can eat more!! Also, maybe just face the fact that older generations would be quicker to believe that going outside with wet hair will give you the flu than not washing your hands......they believe what they believe and there's nothing you can do to change it.................so....just keep doing YOU and let her deal with it. ((HUGS))

McKayMachina

You've lost 126 lbs.

I think it's safe to say you know what you're doing. Good luck with your mom.

I vote: move out. Only way to have a life that's really your own. And that suggestion comes from experience.

mkennedym

here are the signs and symptoms of anorexia nervosa - just show her this.

obvious, rapid, dramatic weight loss
Russell's sign:[20] scarring of the knuckles from placing fingers down the throat to induce vomiting
lanugo: soft, fine hair grows on face and body [21]
obsession with calories and fat content
preoccupation with food, recipes, or cooking; may cook elaborate dinners for others but not eat themselves[22]
dieting despite being thin or dangerously underweight
fear of gaining weight or becoming overweight
rituals: cuts food into tiny pieces; refuses to eat around others; hides or discards food
purging: uses laxatives, diet pills, ipecac syrup, or water pills; may engage in self-induced vomiting; may run to the bathroom after eating in order to vomit and quickly get rid of the calories[23][24]
may engage in frequent, strenuous exercise [25]
perception: perceives self to be overweight despite being told by others they are too thin
becomes intolerant to cold: frequently complains of being cold due to loss of insulating body fat or poor circulation due to extremely low blood pressure; body temperature lowers (hypothermia) in effort to conserve energy [26]
depression: may frequently be in a sad, lethargic state[27]
solitude: may avoid friends and family; becomes withdrawn and secretive
clothing: some may wear baggy, loose-fitting clothes to cover weight loss if they have been confronted about their health and wish to hide it, while others will wear baggy clothing to hide what they see as an unattractive and overweight body.
cheeks may become swollen due to enlargement of the salivary glands caused by excessive vomiting[28]
swollen joints[citation needed]
abdominal distension[citation needed

ContinuousEffort

I'm so sorry your mom is acting this way. There is no way to tell why. You are doing great, and if you feel like exercising for hours.... do it!!!

barefootbeauty

I can't help but think your Mom is projecting her own fears and insecurities onto you. Sounds like you're doing everything the right way and she is the person with issues. Don't let her negativity tear you down.

If she tried to seek treatment for you, you have your MFP logs to prove you're healthy. End of story.

Elzecat

You've lost 126 lbs.

I think it's safe to say you know what you're doing. Good luck with your mom.

I vote: move out. Only way to have a life that's really your own. And that suggestion comes from experience.

What McKay said.

Maybe next time you do a lighter form of exercise (a walk, or a swim, or something) ask your mom if she'll join you. Hopefully she will start to understand that you are losing weight in a healthy way and pushing your body occasionally to see what you're capable of!

Good luck~

Ellen

annabetz

Yeah..I agree with those other people who posted! Wow sista!! That's such an accomplishment to lose that much weight! I know PLENTY of people who would love to have your determination. So, good for you! To be honest, I say move out as well....that is truly when you can have freedom. I also know a lot about anorexia. I know a ton of people who are actually struggling with it right now...all I can say is, that you are FAR from becoming anorexic. Just do what feels good and what makes you happy. Tell the mom to "back off!!!"

Good Luck!

funkyspunky871

Can't move out. I'm 16.

verjavec

Even if she does seek treatment for you - one day wherever and they'll know you aren't anorexic. I hope that list of symptoms helps her to see that you are just feeling good and enjoying the workout! I often workout 2-4 hours in one day. I enjoy it. And then I get to eat more food. Much better than starving all day and doing nothing.

mynameiscarrie

Even if she did seek out treatment, and you went to please her, they would test you first before admitting you. They would have to give you a diagnosis. If you're healthy, you wouldn't get diagnosed and wouldn't be accepted into a treatment facility. If you're being honest (which i'm going to assume you are) you have nothing to worry about.

HoopFire5602

Well for one she doesn't know what she is talking about. It's called exercise bulimia. Anorexia is starvation. Although both can be intermixed, I don't see that happening with you. 116 mins isn't that much....when you get into 4-5-6-7 hours a day, that is over kill. As a former exercise bulimic, I myself tend to go back to my 4-5 hours on the weekends...which I know is unhealthy and I am trying to cut it back, but you are nowhere near that. So stop worrying about what she says. As long as you are doing it for the right reason (using up your energy and not to burn off food you just ate) then you have no issues.

funkyspunky871

Well for one she doesn't know what she is talking about. It's called exercise bulimia. Anorexia is starvation. Although both can be intermixed, I don't see that happening with you. 116 mins isn't that much....when you get into 4-5-6-7 hours a day, that is over kill. I myself tend to go back to my 4-5 hours on the weekends which I know is unhealthy and I am trying to cut it back, but you are nowhere near that. So stop worrying about what she says. As long as you are doing it for the right reason (using up your energy and not to burn off food you just ate) then you have no issues.

The unfortunate thing is that she does know what she's talking about. She said anorexic because those terms are often intermixed. She's a nurse, and a very good nurse at that.

Robyn_T

A friend of mine lost about 50 pounds a few years ago. She started eating more healthy and pounds sort of fell off. After the weight was gone, I think she was still 140 pounds. At 5'1", that's still considered overweight. Her family freaked out and told her she needed to stop losing weight because she was getting too thin and she wasn't eating enough.

To me, it seemed that they were use to the overweight Lisa and, in comparison, the thinner Lisa did look very skinny. She wasn't, but their perception was skewed. She was eating enough, she just wasn't eating as much as they were use to. Plus, people who lose a lot of weight tend lose a lot of roundness in their faces at first, making the weight loss seem even more dramatic.

Could this be a similar case for you? Is your mom panicking because she's still adjusting to your dramatic weight loss?

Your mother's calorie intake seems really low. Maybe she's the one who needs to reevalutate her weight loss plan of action.

In any case, I'm sorry she's freaking out on you. In the end, your exercise and eating habits are only something you can choose.

HoopFire5602

Well for one she doesn't know what she is talking about. It's called exercise bulimia. Anorexia is starvation. Although both can be intermixed, I don't see that happening with you. 116 mins isn't that much....when you get into 4-5-6-7 hours a day, that is over kill. I myself tend to go back to my 4-5 hours on the weekends which I know is unhealthy and I am trying to cut it back, but you are nowhere near that. So stop worrying about what she says. As long as you are doing it for the right reason (using up your energy and not to burn off food you just ate) then you have no issues.

The unfortunate thing is that she does know what she's talking about. She said anorexic because those terms are often intermixed. She's a nurse, and a very good nurse at that.

But if you feel that you are okay and that your diary is healthy, is she really right then??? I tihnk she has just seen it before and is worried about you being like them.

kendf60

I' sure your mom loves you and is worried. You have made amazing changes in a short amount of time. I think educating her on fitness and nutrition could help her understand that you are making these changes in a safe way. Keep up the great work!

bjberry

You have successfully lost about 130 lbs in the past 14 months, or so. Correct? You have eaten your 1200 calories each day, plus eaten your exercise calories, so for that 1200 exercise calorie day, you ate 2400 calories. Sounds deliscious! Your Mom should eat 1200 calories a day and start following your habits in order to lose weight. Just a thought. :drinker: (lots of water)

mynameiscarrie

Well for one she doesn't know what she is talking about. It's called exercise bulimia. Anorexia is starvation. Although both can be intermixed, I don't see that happening with you. 116 mins isn't that much....when you get into 4-5-6-7 hours a day, that is over kill. As a former exercise bulimic, I myself tend to go back to my 4-5 hours on the weekends...which I know is unhealthy and I am trying to cut it back, but you are nowhere near that. So stop worrying about what she says. As long as you are doing it for the right reason (using up your energy and not to burn off food you just ate) then you have no issues.

In order to be bulimic, according to the DSM-IV, you have to binge on a regular basis. It would still be anorexia nervosa or EDNOS if anything different. Starvation is a component of Anorexia nervosa and usually the goal; however, patients that suffer from Anorexia nervosa usually use compensatory measures along with a severely restricted caloric intake.

People with bulimia will exercise as a compensatory behavior, but it has to be followed by a binge (usually between 1500-3000 calories in a short amount of time) in order to be considered bulimic behaviors.

feliciapeters

i think I recall u posting about your mom b4.

Hate to say it, but maybe the best way to deal with her is to make sure she SEES you eating, and (as a Mom I HATE saying this) dont tell her how long you actually worked out or how many calories you burned.

She souinds like shes jealous of your success, cant admit it, and is trrying to make the healthy choices YOUR making & how well your doing seem less amazing than they are, in order to keep herself from having to face the fact that she not doing as well.

Its a sad fact that some people cant be proud of someone elses accomplishments if they feel their own are somehow "less"

Ipersonally think your amazing:flowerforyou:

feliciapeters

i think I recall u posting about your mom b4.

Hate to say it, but maybe the best way to deal with her is to make sure she SEES you eating, and (as a Mom I HATE saying this) dont tell her how long you actually worked out or how many calories you burned.

She souinds like shes jealous of your success, cant admit it, and is trrying to make the healthy choices YOUR making & how well your doing seem less amazing than they are, in order to keep herself from having to face the fact that she not doing as well.

Its a sad fact that some people cant be proud of someone elses accomplishments if they feel their own are somehow "less"

Ipersonally think your amazing:flowerforyou:

feliciapeters

i think I recall u posting about your mom b4.

Hate to say it, but maybe the best way to deal with her is to make sure she SEES you eating, and (as a Mom I HATE saying this) dont tell her how long you actually worked out or how many calories you burned.

She souinds like shes jealous of your success, cant admit it, and is trrying to make the healthy choices YOUR making & how well your doing seem less amazing than they are, in order to keep herself from having to face the fact that she not doing as well.

Its a sad fact that some people cant be proud of someone elses accomplishments if they feel their own are somehow "less"

Ipersonally think your amazing:flowerforyou:

feliciapeters

i have NO idea how that posted 3 times :embarassed:

Heather75

Moms worry. Just make sure you are eating well and make sure she knows it.

emilex

It sounds like your mom loves you, is educated and pretty on top of things. But even educated people who are on top of things have a hard time seeing things for what they really are when it comes to the ones we love. I think that it sounds like you have lost an incredible amount of weight, which is awesome! But also, your mom could be having a hard time with the "new" you. Especially if your mom trying to lose weight herself. Just keep on doing what you are doing, being healthy, and plugging along. You mom will come around eventually. And if she does send you to treatment, if you are healthy....your treatment providers will recognize that and they will help your mom see it. Good luck to you!