Yeah I know how this is.... :(

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  • MiniMichelle
    MiniMichelle Posts: 807 Member
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    I am beginning to feel this way too and I am JUST starting... He is not supporting me. Telling me things like "I dont care about your calories" or "why do you care so much what we have for dinner"... I worked out for 3 days straight, which I have not done since i was like 8 or something, and I said... honey arn't you proud of me? A simple yeah babe great job would have been nice.. but no i get "3 days... how about I be proud of you after 2 months".... Not only will my body be changing the next few months, but I have this sickning feeling my relationship will be too.

    Good Luck to you!!
  • FitFrenchGirl
    FitFrenchGirl Posts: 177
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    I am beginning to feel this way too and I am JUST starting... He is not supporting me. Telling me things like "I dont care about your calories" or "why do you care so much what we have for dinner"... I worked out for 3 days straight, which I have not done since i was like 8 or something, and I said... honey arn't you proud of me? A simple yeah babe great job would have been nice.. but no i get "3 days... how about I be proud of you after 2 months".... Not only will my body be changing the next few months, but I have this sickning feeling my relationship will be too.

    Good Luck to you!!



    totally the same thing with mines...:( he is just like yeah its nice you workout and all but idk your changing..blah blah...sucks...good luck to you too hunny!
  • BRFMcKay
    BRFMcKay Posts: 80 Member
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    I am sorry you are going through this! My boyfriend works 2 jobs and he wishes we could go to the gym together, since he now has a tire in his middle! He is sad, because I motivate him to go.

    The only thing he complains about is my need for feet/ankle/calf/knee/shoulder and back massages, like one a day. lol.
  • iamhealingmyself
    iamhealingmyself Posts: 579 Member
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    Women have to realize that we are not just changing ourselves in this process. We are changing their world too - and it's out of their control. That makes guys crazy. I went though this in 2006 with my now ex. I did it for me because I was tired of being 30lbs over weight and feeling like crap all the time, never being happy or feeling pretty. When I started walking 4 miles everyday, he accused me of having an affair! This after 15 years of marriage, 3 years of being together before and 3 kids. If I wore makeup, he said it wasn't for him and he pretty much called me a *kitten*. So yeah, it's not that their not proud of your efforts but you're taking everything they know and trust and feel secure with and messing it all up (in a good way for you though). Tell them just because you want to change your body and how you feel and what you eat doesn't mean you love and care for them any less. Help educate them about why you're choosing certain foods over others. They really just might be blind to reality like we all were at some point before we got here. All you can do is show them the path and tell them that you wish they would share this journey with you, but let them know if they don't want to, it won't stop you. If they would really rather have an overweight, unhappy and potentially sick spouse, then maybe they're not the right person for you. "In sickness and in health" should mean what it says.

    I hope you all are able to work through what's going on because hurt feelings now will only lead to resentment later. Talk about how you feel, and LISTEN (without commenting until they are done speaking) to what they are feeling and thinking, be sure to include them in why you want to change or get healthy and encourage them to do the same. Of course you can't force them to change when they're not ready or don't see a need but that shouldn't stop you from being the best you that you can be.

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